I think I’ll get a pair, just to see what kinda skin I can use with them.
They will nickle and dime with the DLC, there’s no way to use the skin you want.
It’s going to get cracked day one.
Maybe, but I don’t think it will be that fast.
Yeah, I think I’ll just wait until it’s modded for custom skins.
I thought the nanomachine fabric was bad for your health?
No that’s just a meme.
My walls are made of that thing and I’m alright.
Are the walls hacked yet?
I’m going to marry Camotan!
We now have underwear that can change its look… Don’t you just love the future?
I would if they weren’t a bunch of assholes with their business practices.
Then don’t buy the underwear.
I won’t
This thread is closed
For the longest time, the term “Christmas Cake” referred to women aged 26 or above, who are regarded as undesirable – just like a Christmas Cake that ceases being useful after December 25th.
But men around Glitch City developed a sweet tooth.
”Who doesn’t like a mature woman?” Todd, 19, told The Augmented Eye. “They have all the necessary experience already and plus, I’m soooo tired of spoiled, immature girls doing stupid sh*t. I say bring on the hot office ladies!”
Jill, 27, is confused.
”Christmas what? Is that like the opposite of Beefcake?” After discovering the real meaning, she launched into an hour-long rant. “I’ll let you know pencil skirts are the best!”
Don’t you just love casual misogyny?
Sukeban Soft just unveiled a new line of personal computers for the anime enthusiast market. This is after several attempts at appealing to a broader audience with the Uranus game console.
Launch games have been announced as well. They include popular franchises like Monster Girl RPG, Monster Girlfriend, and Monster Companion.
”We’re going for the weeb audience,” said Kiririn51, a Sukeban Soft janitor.
”What’s dignity anymore?”
Sukeban Soft plans to launch the AM TOWNSHIPS sometime next year.
Just because you’re self-aware about being gross doesn’t mean you’ve stopped being gross, guys.
Weapon enthusiasts are freaking out right now over a firmware update that MAKISE Heavy Industries is releasing for its EDKV-186 line of assault rifles.
Full compatibility with NANOCAMO has been announced, allowing civilian models of this weapon the use of nano camouflage, and the option to customize their look for free with the help of the NANOCAMO app.
”We’ve been using NANOCAMO in the battlefield for a year now,” MAKISE’s chairperson told The Augmented Eye during a phone conversation. “And thanks to its flexibility, we can now sneak past the enemies using the environment to our favor. Our equipment is basically invisible with NANOCAMO.”
The NANOCAMO update will be released this month.
Every now and then, I wonder if I’ll ever meet my significant other…all the stimulae from being born just three years ago, and directly being thrown in this wonderful disaster that is the idol industry, makes me think of all the things I’m missing. Accidental love, lost love, or even the gentle touch of another person, I feel like I’m in this bubble that won’t let me catch all possible feelings, and my senses get tired of the same environment.
I want to meet new people, places! Because even though I have a large bank of knowledge, I actually never experimented with what most consider normal.
But you already know that from my songs
“And that cage?”
“I…um…brought my cat.”
“Your cat?”
“DID I HEAR YASUNORI KATO WAS IN THE BAR?!”
Wikipedia tells me that Yasunori Kato is a fictional character created by Hiroshi Aramata, and the protagonist of Teito Monogatari, so…yeah? Talk about a deep cut.
“Wait…there are no evil Onmyouji here.”
“Boss…what the fuck?”
“Didn’t you say you brought Kato to the bar?”
“My cat. CAT!”
“Well, that’s even better! Hey Fore!”
“…”
“So cute.”
“Why did you bring him?”
“I heard some apartments in my building were being raided.”
”Fore’s my weed carrier, you see.”
“I don’t have anything suspicious, but you never know. So I’d rather have him here, at least today.”
“Ah well, I’d say something about the health regulations, but we already had a pack of Corgis here.”
“Do you want me to take care of him in my office? Please?”
“Sure…but he’s a bit shy, so…”
“And I think she didn’t hear me.”
”I haven’t slept in 10 years, Jill.”
“I live close by.”
“Really?”
“Yup, Chief got me a small apartment nearby. Something about the BTC housing program.”
Is BTC an intentional reference to bitcoin or am I just reading too much into things?
“Oh yeah, I got mine through that too…”
“Time to mix drinks and change lives.”
“…”
“Um…lady, did you hear me?”
“A dog. ANOTHER dog.”
“Hey! I’m not just another dog, I came here as a part-timer!”
“So you’re the part-timer.”
“Yeah!”
“…”
“Boss! I’m taking my break!”
“It’s too early!”
“Shit.”
“sigh The part-timer is here!”
“Huh, he came early.”
Dogs are cute, Jill.
“Because look at him! He has a Hawaiian shirt! And sunglasses!”
See? Dana here knows what’s up.
“And he’s a Shiba, not a Corgi. I don’t know what you’re complaining about.”
(“They all look the same to me.”)
Almost like the devs didn’t have time to make two separate sprites so they just used the same one for Shibas and Corgis.
“Granted, Shibas could be seen as the Japanese counterpart to Corgis.”
“They’re both funny-looking and dogs used by the royalty.”
“Anyways. Starting today, this dog will help around here.”
“My name is…”
Urge to make a bad, bad reference suppressed.
“IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS.”
The part of Dana Zane is portrayed by Dwayne Johnson.
“…Boss, please don’t shout.”
”Don’t reference 70 year old television either.”
“Sorry.”
“Just call him Rad Shiba.”
“Why Rad Shiba?”
“What part of Hawaiian shirt and sunglasses don’t you get? He’s the raddest thing here!”
“Thanks!”
“Anyways, he will mostly help getting orders, bringing clients in and cleaning, but he ought to know how things work.”
“Cleaning? That’d be a change of pace.”
How many people have done this thing with Jill so far? Like, two?
“Um…right.”
“I’ll have a Grizzly Temple.”
“…”
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, just a couple of post-traumatic flashbacks.”
“Coming right up.”
“Wow! This is awful!”
“People actually pay for this shit?”
I could make a meta joke, but I already did that, so I won’t.
“Hard to believe, I know.”
“So…what brings a dog like you to taking a part-time job here?”
“I’m here to help the funding of my organization.”
“Are you with the Seifar Toy Company?”
“What? No! Don’t lump me in with those Herding Supremacists.”
Because what this game needed was racist Corgis.
“I have a more noble and benign organization. I belong to CIRA.”
“CIRA?”
“Canine Independent Rescue Association.”
“We give a place where dogs can be dogs and save them from themselves.”
Rescuing dogs from the horrors of modernity.
“CIRA is what I love, but, damn is it expensive sometimes.”
“We decided to take part-time jobs to help fund anything it needs.”
“We want to help CIRA be the best it can be.”
”Mostly that just means buying chew toys.”
“What do you do at CIRA?”
“Pay treatment for hurt dogs, give food to the hungry ones, play with the bored ones…”
“We’re there for everyone.”
“Huh…that actually sounds nice.”
“Say, do you have a menu?”
Is it called a menu if it only has drinks? Genuine question.
“Something like that, yeah. Here.”
“Now, let’s see…”
“Any recommendations?”
“Avoid the part with “Promo” drinks.”
“Oh, the Grizzly Temple is one of those.”
“Fluffy Dream? I like the sound of this one.”
“Coming right up.”
“Well, this one’s nice.”
“So, why did you pick a bar?”
“It seemed fun.”
“I didn’t need that many weird skills to be part of this so it was my best bet.”
“Besides, it’s close to home, so I can get here by walking.”
“And I do love me some walks. I could walk all day!”
“Weird skills?”
“Yeah, stuff like “food handler’s certificate”, “previous work experience”, or “thumbs”.”
“…”
“Why did you pick a bar?”
”Cheap booze.”
“Um… On a whim too, I guess.”
“I wanted a place where I could see people come and go all the time.”
“And bartending sounded a bit more glamorous than just being a store clerk.”
I know a convenience store where the local high school kids just started stealing like, cabbages and shit. Ended up having to install cameras.
“Oh yeah. About the way you mix stuff.”
“Yeah?”
“Is it-…hey…”
“It’s a cat! A cat!”
“Hey Fore, weren’t you in Boss’ office?”
“Hello cat! Wanna play? Let’s play!”
“…”
“Didn’t dogs hate cats or something?”
“We don’t hate them - unless they’re intruders.”
“Huh…”
“You said his name was Fore? Hello Fore! Let’s play!”
Pretty sure this is the second foreplay joke they’ve made?
“…”
“No playing allowed, you’ll make a mess. Fore, go back to Boss’ office.”
“Meow.”
“That’s one obedient cat.”
Meanwhile, my cat is pure chaotic evil.
“My pride.”
“You want something else?”
“Eh?”
“Alright.”
sigh (“I shouldn’t get riled up so easily by dogs, but…I’m just tired, I guess.”)
“Hello Jill!”
“Eh?! T-That voice…”
“W-What happened to you?!”
“Nice seeing you too!”
“Well, I fell from a really tall place to a really rough spot.”
That’s…one way to put it.
“Are you okay? Do you need an ambulance or something?”
“I just got out of one, don’t worry.”
“How did you manage to slip by the mobs lynching White Knights?”
”I killed them all!”
“It was a bit rough. Luckily these bandages helped me conceal my identity! Heheh…”
You wouldn’t believe how many cerulean-haired girls there are in Glitch City.
“Why come straight here?”
”To get wasted.”
“I…”
“The ambulance where I got treatment couldn’t stray too far away from the hospital.”
“They’re nice people, I’ve talked to them a lot while on rescue duties.”
“I was nearby and yours was the closest friendly face I could find.”
“I needed to regain my composure before doing anything else, so…here I am.”
“Um…if you’re scared because they might come for me I can leave, you know?”
“The security systems of the bar are top-notch, and my boss is also the bouncer of sorts here.”
The security systems are just Dana.
“I’d say you’re actually safer here. So I’m not worried about me.”
“Instead I’m…worried about you.”
I’m pretty sure that even in this state she could suplex a train.
“First I hear you were at the bank, then I find out you “disappeared”.”
“And now you show up with all those bandages.”
“Are you fine? What happened at that bank exactly?”
“Did you talk with Stella? She was worried sick about you!”
“Slow… Slow down a bit… The medications make me feel everything more intensely, almost like a hangover.”
“S-Sorry.”
Turns out giant blocks of text are bad for the brain.
“It’s nice to know someone like a bartender was worried about me though. Thanks.”
Pretty sure bartenders have feelings just like everyone else, Sei.
“Everyone I know has been ignoring me, so I was feeling lonely.”
“Why would they?”
“Well, you’ve seen the lynches they give to any White Knight they find.”
The Glitch City opposition are a very…unique bunch.
“By ignoring me, they’re actually saving me from getting kicked to death.”
“My good deeds finally paid off, I guess…heheh…”
“Can I get you anything?”
”Get me ten Jägerbombs.”
“Um…something sweet without alcohol.”
“Thank god these pants still had my wallet in them.”
They started making womens’ pants with pockets? Wild.
“Oh no, I couldn’t take your money right now. It’s on the-…”
“Jill, please. I wanna pay for my drinks.”
“I take it I won’t be able to change your mind.”
“Nope. I mean yes. I mean… You won’t be able to change my mind.”
“…sweet and no alcohol, right? Coming right up.”
“Yay! This’ll help me calm down a bit.”
“So, what happened to you? Where did you fall from?”
…a building?
“I was escaping the place near the end of the whole thing, and I had to make a leap of faith.”
“I’ve jumped from higher places, but I landed badly here.”
“Most of my injuries are actually from some debris that fell on me.”
“Oh, but my broken arm is actually from the fall.”
“How?”
“I rolled to mitigate the fall, but I made a bad move and broke it.”
“Good thing I drink lots of milk!”
“…”
Same, Jill, same.
“I was under rubble for quite a bit, but luckily someone found me.”
“”Someone”?”
Jill seems to be asking a lot of dumb questions today, for some reason?
“I woke up in the hospital, they told me some guy brought me there.”
“I don’t know who he was, but I owe him my life.”
“…”
“W-What?”
“N-Nothing, you just sound um…cheerful.”
”Also that’s the second time a complete stranger saved your life.”
“I’m alive! Why wouldn’t I be?”
“After all that happened at the bank, here I am, talking to you. Being able to talk at all.”
I’m pretty sure that Valhalla is actually Purgatory, so I dunno why you’re so happy.
“…”
“Don’t think too much about it. I’m fine! I’m totally fi-owowowowowow…”
“…”
“Eh…um…”
“H-How were things around here? I heard there was a huge commotion when the whole thing happened.”
“I had to sleep here in the bar on Saturday, but I guess it could’ve been worse.”
”I mean, I could’ve been stuck on a terrace, forced to make small talk with my boss. Wait…”
“Glad to know that.”
“Did you contact Stella? She was on the verge of despair yesterday.”
“Eh…um…”
“H-Hey Jill! I want another drink! A…uh…um…a Bleeding Jane!”
“…”
What you actually have to do here is get her a Blue Fairy. The game will occasionally throw curveballs like this, and the correct choice usually relies on remembering a character’s favorite drinks, and other similar things.
“Phew…”
“Thanks!”
“Yeah…”
“So, how were things inside the bank?”
Violent, I’d imagine.
“cough cough Come again?”
“What happened inside the bank? How did you manage to get through it?”
“Um…I was with this nice bunch of people. Well…they were apparently nice at the very least.”
“We tried our best to find our way out of the whole thing, cracking through the security, finding safe spots.”
”In the end, it turned out it was just an elaborate Room Escape challenge!”
“But then…”
“Um…”
“…”
“Sorry for asking all that, it was obviously over the line.”
“N-No, don’t worry about it. It’s just the analgesics still numbing me.”
“I’ll take my leave now. Thank you for everything, Jill.”
“Are you alright?”
Does she seem alright to you?
“…”
“sigh”
“Eh? Weren’t you leaving?”
“Yeah, I was, but…well…”
“You know how I just said I was fine?”
She was not.
“Yeah?”
“I-I’m not.”
“So I wanted to know if you could lend me your ear for a bit.”
“Well, I was gonna take my break…”
“Oh sorry…”
“No, what I mean is that I could lend you an ear if you don’t mind going to the back alley for a bit.”
Nothing at all suspicious about back alleys.
“Y-Yeah, please…”
That’s the end of this segment and somehow…no one has said “I see.” at all. Talk about a shocker!