OHPW - Business May Die [Fire Pro Wrestling World]

Deathmaster780 · February 10, 2019, 6:00am

Mina%20Headshot%202 Well that sucked, it’s what I get for only cheating at a 60% level. And the Scottsman didn’t even blow up when I lit him up! Man I need to find someone else to beat up to cheer me up now.
Oh well, till next time 당신 안녕을 사랑!

yerpalhal · February 10, 2019, 11:04am

Angus: Man whit a nicht eh. Man i never had this hard fought a match since the gorbals rammy of 2016. I beat the mighty flamander! how awesome is that

-sips some true bru-

Susan I see a great career in yuir future hen continue to brutalise anyone stupid to get in yuir way and if ye need someone tae dae the brutalising then feel free tae caw me i like a good rammy.

Noo as fir ye firestar I need to explode a schmuck called Schicklgrubers car ye in hen…i’ll show ye how explosive tru bru mixed wie hellfire is

IGgy · February 10, 2019, 2:37pm

OHPW - Week 4: DARE DESU KA!!?

Match Card and Results:

Hello again everybody. It’s time for our first major event. We’ll come together in the usual place, at the usual time and crown our first ever Infernal Hellweight Champion as we wrap up our Hellweight Tournament. Who will it be? On top of that all our titles will be defended on the show. The Legion Titles, the Bunny Title :3, the Darkweight Title, the Seven Deadly Pins Title and even the Jabroni Royale

The tournament right now:

Scene: IGgy explains to Satan that he will leave OHPW to avoid spoilers since he’s meeting all these people who know him but he’s never seen. But he has arranged for someone to replace him. After IGgy leaves, a Skeleton introducing himself as IGgy from the far future appears and takes over.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge (‘c’) vs. The Great Maharaja

They both explode. rip.

#2 Seven Deadly Pins
Hobo One Kevodki vs. Harley Havic vs. Manic Misanthrope vs. Weeb Weaver vs. The Ego vs. Super Samio vs. Kelsey Slaughter vs. Undeddie Guerrero ©

Ah, yes, our clusterfuck. Unfortunately for Undeddie he could not retain. In the end it came down to Kelsey Slaughter and Hobo. Kelsey managed to put away her final opponent and is the new Seven Deadly Pins Champion.

#3 IHC Tournament Round 2 - Group 1
Firestar vs. Angus McMutton

Firestar tries to set Angus on fire early on but Angos is not fazed by it. Not too much anyway. Eventually he wins using an Ushigoroshi

#4 IHC Tournament Round 2 - Group 2
Dash Rendar vs. Suzan Blade

This match made me happy because Dash got his ass kicked something fierce and lost

#5 IHC Tournament Round 2 - Group 1
Fomore vs. Flamander

A good match, lots more back and forth than expected. But Fomore could not pull an upset and had to give way to Flamander after a Pumphandle Driver

#6 IHC Tournament Round 2 - Group 2
Undeddie Guerrero vs. Black

Undeddie, even though he wisely didn’t overexert himself in the 7 Pins match could not defeat Black.

Scene: Robutt is just standing there without any clothes on when Vacation Skeleton appears to admire his hot bod. VS and Robutt agree to form a unit called “The Fun Gang”. DCB enters the room because she forgot something and is immediately dragged into The Fun Gang, becoming a member.

#7 OHPW Legion Duo Championships
The Fun Gang vs. Pineapple Pizza ©

THE FUN GANG WINS! … but Pineapple Pizza retain because The Fun Gang won by DQ. Although they did use a fun move to do so. The Chair’s Illusion that famously had Undeddie Guerrero win against The Great Maharaja in the previous week.

#8 IHC Tournament Semi-Final - Group 1

Angus McMutton vs. Flamander

Holy shit! this is the biggest win in Angus’ carreer. He defeats Flamander with the Tru Bru!

#9 IHC Tournament Semi-Final - Group 2

Suzan Blades vs. Black

It was an even match until Suzan did a Hijack Backbreaker on Black. Black had to tap out during the spinny part of the move. Wow.

#10 Bunny Championship :3
N-T Punk vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

What a showing from N-T Punk. But he still lost to Mr. Shakedown who is still our Bunny Champion :3

#11 OHPW Underworld Darkweight Title
Pantha vs. The Cocademon ©

The Power of Coca Cola was not strong enough to withstand the Pantha Claw! Pantha wins by submission.

#12 Infernal Hellweight Championship

Angus McMutton vs. Suzan Blades

So this is what it’s all come down to. An exhausted Angus vs. a comparatively fresh Suzan who kept her matches on the shorter end. Not that it matters because the game doesn’t simulate exhaustion, but we’re telling a story here damnit! But Angus and Suzan gave it all they had left until it ended with a Knightfall from Suzan for the three count. Our first Hellweight Champion is Suzan Blades!

Scene: Well, this is unexpected. Vacant appears. The most decorated wrester in history. He’s held all the titles at one point except the ones that were won in tournaments in brazil way back. It seems he’s upset he wasn’t even invited to defend his titles. So he issues the Vacant Open Challenge to prove that he is the best. Starting next week challengers may arise.

Whew, we have our first Hellweight Champion. PublicOpinion drew a nice sketch of them. Have a look!

The entire bracket looks like this now, for those who care

IGgy · February 13, 2019, 5:12pm

This week we’ll have our first show after the IHW Championship Tournament
It will, of course, take place in the usual place at the usual time

The Match Card is down below, featuring some people we know, some new faces and the beginning of the Vacant Open Challenge.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge (“c”) vs. N-T Punk

#2 Battle Royal
Anna May vs. Boob Marley vs. Palpatine vs. Weeb Weaver vs. Harley Havik

#3 Singles Match
Grace Thoruson vs. Harmony Gray

#4 Tag Team Landmine Deathmatch
Lawful Good vs. Wizards Not Allowed

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Hobo One Kevodki vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
Some yet to be determined fool vs. Vacant

#7 Underworld Darkweight Championship
Black vs. Pantha ©

IGgy · February 16, 2019, 9:45pm

Going live now and starting in 15 minutes https://www.twitch.tv/iggy_igsen

Here’s the match card again:
#1 DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. N-T Punk for the Jabroni Royale
#2 Anna May vs. Boob Marley vs. Palpatine vs. Weeb Weaver vs. Harley Havik
#3 Grace Thoruson vs. Harmony Gray
#4 Lawful Good vs. Wizards Not Allowed
#5 Hobo One Kevodki vs. Mr. Shakedown © for the Bunny Title :3
#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
#7 Black vs. Pantha © for the Darkweight Title

IGgy · February 17, 2019, 12:28pm

OHPW - Week 5: Gimmick Infringement (Twitch VOD)

Clips:
Match 1: https://clips.twitch.tv/DarlingCheerfulMomTF2John
Match 7: https://clips.twitch.tv/IgnorantKindZebraBrainSlug
Match 7 (Spoiler): https://clips.twitch.tv/SparklyClearDugongVoteNay

Match Card and Results:

This week we’ll have our first show after the IHW Championship Tournament
It will, of course, take place in the usual place at the usual time

The Match Card is down below, featuring some people we know, some new faces and the beginning of the Vacant Open Challenge.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge (“c”) vs. N-T Punk

Just a few seconds to go! DCB goes for the roll-up! One… Two… NOOO! And then everybody explodes

Scene: Dash has a bit of a meltdown and promises a “big surprise”

#2 Battle Royal
Anna May vs. Boob Marley vs. Palpatine vs. Weeb Weaver vs. Harley Havik

First Harley gets eliminated with a screwy countoud where she only got thrown out of the ring when the count was nearing 20 already. Seconds after Weeb succumbed to Palpy’s Imperial Powerbomb. Now it’s a three way. They go and go, Palpy even hits the Galactic Elbow on Boob but ulitmately is the next to be eliminated by Anna May’s Claw. From here Boob puts Anna into the Sunken Chest repeatedly but she does not surrender and makes Boob tap with another Claw to win the match.

#3 Singles Match
Grace Thoruson vs. Harmony Gray

Wow, what a brutal match. They hit each other hard and they never stopped. Neither of them actually hit their finishers. The match ended after a Kamigoye to Grace. She couldn’t get back up. Harmony takes the win!

Scene: Harmony returns to Gorilla exhausted from her match and talks about how she loves fighting Harmony (even if it means getting hit very hard repeatedly)

#4 Tag Team Landmine Deathmatch
Lawful Good vs. Wizards Not Allowed

The heels Lawful Good vs. the heels Wizards Not Allowed fought and the match ended via illegal maneuvers leading into a pinfall, earning WNA the win.

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Hobo One Kevodki vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

It took two elbow drops to the ass and a wallet squeeze for hobo to tap out but that’s a lot of punishment.

Scene: HazMatt comes to the ring, furious that Chief Engineer has a similar attire to him. He’s so mad he requested a tag match of the Fallout Boys vs. No Wizards Allowed

#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE

Vacation Skeleton vs. Vacant

Vacant claims their first victim. Vacation loses by TKO

#7 Underworld Darkweight Championship
Black vs. Pantha ©

Another hard hitting match. Black never went for his finisher somehow, even late in the match. He’d probably have won if he’d used it. Pantha on the other hand was relentless, whipping out move after move, one more devastating than the other her final move was the Pantha Claw, Bkack refused to tap out and instead passed out.

IGgy · February 20, 2019, 5:43pm

It’s time once more to wrassle!
We will do so at the usual time in the usual place

We’ll have the promised Fallout Boys vs. Wizards Not Allowed match for the honor of HazMatts attire, the singles Debut of Harley Havik against newcomer Kayu Zakisaka, Mr. Shakedown faces his biggest challenge yet with Undeddie Guerrero. Can Shakedown resist catching and holding a chair within view of the ref? The Vacant Open Challenge continues and finally Kelsey Slaughter defends the Seven Deadly Pins Title.

I started gathering Highlight matches they don’t have their own videos yet but you can still check them out. Eventually I’ll make upload a video for heach highlighted match.

Here’s the match card.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Boob Marley

#2 Singles Match
Harley Havik vs. Kayu Zakisaka

#3 Tag Team Match
Fallout Boys vs. Wizards Not Allowed

#4 Singles Match
Firestar vs. Palpatine

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Undeddie Guerrero vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
One unlucky fool vs. Vacant

#7 Seven Deadly Pins
Nawt a Robutt vs. Cocademon vs. King Skeleton vs. Great Maharaja vs. Fomore vs. Angus vs. IGgy IGsen vs. Kelsey Slaughter ©

Deathmaster780 · February 21, 2019, 12:17am

Mina%20Headshot%202 헬로 풋 내기, it’s Mina again! I’m back after two weeks of drinking and low blowing with my new friend Angus. Turns out Hell’s not that really on fire like the stories said but I’ve done my best to fix that.
Anyway, Angus asked me to come meet him at the arena tonight. I thought we were going to knock back some more brews and boneheads but apparently he just wants me to meet some creepy old man he works with. That’s fine by me, I love low blowing new people!
Mina%20Headshot%202 Wish me luck! 당신 안녕을 사랑

IGgy · February 23, 2019, 9:45pm

Going live now and starting in 15 minutes https://www.twitch.tv/iggy_igsen

Here’s the match card again:
#1 DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Boob Marley for the Jabroni Royale
#2 Harley Havik vs. Kayu Zakisaka
#3 Fallout Boys vs. Wizards Not Allowed
#4 Firestar vs. Palpatine
#5 Undeddie Guerrero vs. Mr. Shakedown © for the Bunny Title :3
#6 Someone vs. Vacant
#7 Seven Deadly Pins Battle Royal feat. Kelsey Slaughter ©

Deathmaster780 · February 24, 2019, 1:11am

Mina%20Headshot%202 Holy Fuckballs! I haven’t had so much fun crushing old man nuts since that one time in Vegas!
Man, if this is what’s like in the ora 66 then I’m going to fit in just fine! 당신 안녕을 사랑!

IGgy · February 24, 2019, 11:54am

Week 6: I’ve Exploded Before (Twitch VOD)

Clips:
Match 4 (Outcome Spoiler): https://clips.twitch.tv/DarkCooperativeGoatDatBoi
Match 7 (Elimination Spoiler): https://clips.twitch.tv/PricklyBillowingKoalaFUNgineer
Match 7: https://clips.twitch.tv/IcyTubularEelTBTacoLeft

Match Card and Results:

It’s time once more to wrassle!
We will do so at the usual time in the usual place

We’ll have the promised Fallout Boys vs. Wizards Not Allowed match for the honor of HazMatts attire, the singles Debut of Harley Havik against newcomer Kayu Zakisaka, Mr. Shakedown faces his biggest challenge yet with Undeddie Guerrero. Can Shakedown resist catching and holding a chair within view of the ref? The Vacant Open Challenge continues and finally Kelsey Slaughter defends the Seven Deadly Pins Title.

I started gathering Highlight matches they don’t have their own videos yet but you can still check them out. Eventually I’ll make upload a video for heach highlighted match.

Here’s the match card.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Boob Marley

It takes three Sunken Chests before DCB can’t take it anymore. No victory for the Explosion. But unfortunately also no victory for DCB

Scene: Palpy tries to recuit Firestar and she seems to be on board but will make her decision based on how much fun she’ll have in their match later on.

#2 Singles Match
Harley Havik vs. Kayu Zakisaka

This is the first singles match for Harley and the Debut for Kayu and they made sure to put on a clinic to let you know just how much potential they both have. Kayu wins the match via pinfall.

#3 Tag Team Match
Fallout Boys vs. Wizards Not Allowed

This is the result of HazMatt’s challenge from last week, but it didn’t end with Matt or Chief taking a lot of punishment, but with George Cluwney almost sneakily pinning Doc Mutant.

Scene: Not satisfied with this match Chief Engineer challenges Haz Matt to a singles match in a post match interview. It will take place at RAISE HELL and to make sure there’s no interference it will be a cage match. How will this feud over who has the best hazmat suit end??? Tune in for RAISE HELL in two weeks. But also next week.

#4 Singles Match
Firestar vs. Palpatine

Nobody flies out and explodes but Mina gets extended time with The Dark Side which makes Palpy tap out.

Scene: Just Majestic Goat-Man and Vacation Skeleton having a chat backstage. Nothing unusual happens.

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Undeddie Guerrero vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

Even though Undeddie tried to win by DQ like three times he proves that he really wants to earn the Bunny Title by not surrendering until he simply can’t get back up anymore and Mr. Shakedown wins by pinfall.

#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
The Ego vs. Vacant

Ego loses, Vacant wins. The only reason I’m putting these foregone conclusions in spoiler tags is so when someone gets a fluke win over Vacant it’ll still be a surprise to people.

Scene: The oRa 66 celebrate being three people again.

#7 Seven Deadly Pins
Nawt a Robutt vs. Cocademon vs. King Skeleton vs. Great Maharaja vs. Fomore vs. Angus vs. IGgy IGsen vs. Kelsey Slaughter ©

First Fmore fucking kills Angus for real just less than four minutes in. Next IGgy taps, then the reigning champ Kelsey gets pinned. Robutt is eliminated next also via pinfall, as is Cocademon and finally Fomore taps out both King Skeleton and Great Maharaja to become the new Seven Deadly Pins Champion.

IGgy · February 27, 2019, 6:49pm

It’s time for more OHPW in the usual place at the usual time.

Things are heating up as we get ready for RAISE HELL, the event where we raise hell. DCB tries once more to get rid of the Jabroni Royale against deathmatch wrestler Kelsey Slaughter in a Barbed Wire deathmatch with an explosion timer. 1 1/2 Dragons (Roy and Ryu) make their debut, Rosette and Flamander compete for a Hellweight title shot next week and Pineapple Pizza defend their Legion Titles against oRa 66.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Kelsey Slaughter

#2 Singles Match
Super Samio vs. Manic Misanthrope

#3 Tag Team Match
1 1/2 Dragons vs. Lawful Good

#4 Infernal Hellweight No. 1 Contender Match
Canada ‘Rosette’ Alderman vs. Flamander

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Vacation Skeleton vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

#6 Vacant Open Challenge
Somebody with a death wish vs. Vacant

#7 Legion Tag Championships
oRa 66 vs. Pineapple Pizza ©

Deathmaster780 · February 27, 2019, 8:47pm

Suzan%20Headshot%202 “Do you know what the difference between good soul, and a bad souls? The Drunken Scotsman Angus and the endless darkness Black were good souls. They proved to be challenging opponents and worthy of my time!”

Suzan%20Headshot%202 “Dash Render however is a bad soul. He wouldn’t just lay down and get out of my way so I was forced to beat the piss out of him and try and show him the error of his ways. A task I failed at mind you. Yes Dash, I heard you banging outside my dressing room door, have some goddamned self-respect, you’re supposedly a warrior aren’t you?”

Suzan%20Headshot%202 “But I digress, at the pay per view in two weeks I will be facing either HellRanger Flamander or the Pink Warrior Rosette. They are both good souls and I will be happy to fight either one of them. So Rosette, Flamander, sort it out between yourselves who will face me and then be prepared to bring your best to the fight because at Raise Hell…”

Suzan Transforms into her Dark Knight form

"WE WILL RAISE HELL!!!"

yerpalhal · February 28, 2019, 10:47am

Angus wakes up in the ring where he ended last weeks broadcast

Angus: the fu…

-rubs his head-

Angus: I need tae get me erse in gear ah dinnea wantae fight dcb

-looks at match card-

Angus: that’ll do ig…that’ll do

Deathmaster780 · February 28, 2019, 4:14pm

Mina%20Headshot%202 Mina saunters down to the ring with a 24 pack of beer

Mina%20Headshot%202 “Here, drink up dumbass, our match is only in 3 days and if we’re going to Cheat those Pizza fools out of their titles I’m need you unconcussed and good and drunk for when it rolls around.”

IGgy · March 2, 2019, 9:44pm

Going live now and starting in 15 minutes https://www.twitch.tv/iggy_igsen

Here’s the match card again:
#1 DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Kelsey Slaughter for the Jabroni Royale
#2 Super Samio vs. Manic Misanthrope
#3 1 1/2 Dragons vs. Lawful Good
#4 Rosette vs. Flamander
#5 Vacation Skeleton vs. Mr. Shakedown © for the Bunny :3
#6 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
#7 oRa 66 vs. Pineapple Pizza © for the Legion Titles

IGgy · March 3, 2019, 1:53pm

OHPW - Week 7: Bad Vacation (Twitch VOD)

Clips:
Match 4: https://www.twitch.tv/videos/389417826

Match Card and Results:

It’s time for more OHPW in the usual place at the usual time.

Things are heating up as we get ready for RAISE HELL, the event where we raise hell. DCB tries once more to get rid of the Jabroni Royale against deathmatch wrestler Kelsey Slaughter in a Barbed Wire deathmatch with an explosion timer. 1 1/2 Dragons (Roy and Ryu) make their debut, Rosette and Flamander compete for a Hellweight title shot next week and Pineapple Pizza defend their Legion Titles against oRa 66.

Scene: Angus is still knocked out from last week, apparenlty. He’s being woken up by a crew member and is asked to vacate the ring for the show that is about to start.

#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
DivineCoffeeBinge © vs. Kelsey Slaughter

Holy crap! Kelsey proves she’s a deathmatch wrestler. Despite some bursts of offense from DCB she controlled the match until the end, winning via pinfall!

#2 Singles Match
Super Samio vs. Manic Misanthrope

We talked about NXT during this match then Manic won via pinfall as I was about to point out that he’s ripping off King Skeleton’s moves.

Scene: Goat-Man and Vacation Skeleton have a bit of a chat about their origin stories but they are interrupted by Malfest Goat-Monster manifesting in the room, viciously attacking Vacation Skeleton sending him flying across the room with a single strike.

#3 Tag Team Match
1 1/2 Dragons vs. Lawful Good

The newcomers take this one. After Ryu uses the Kaiser Claw on Lemuel he just can’t kick out anymore.

#4 Infernal Hellweight No. 1 Contender Match
Canada ‘Rosette’ Alderman vs. Flamander

Flamander seemingly didn’t take this match seriously at all while Rosette gave it all she had. It took almost twenty minutes before it was decided that Flamander would be facing Suzan Blades next week after beating Rosette via submission.

Scene: HazMatt comes out to the ring to raise the stakes for his match against Chief Engineer next week. He is demanding a mask vs. mask match.

#5 Bunny Championship :3
Vacation Skeleton Nawt A Robutt vs. Mr. Shakedown ©

Robutt brought in all the suplexes except for his Tokyo Thunderwave of Death but he was still bested by Mr. Shakedown. Who can stop this guy?

#6 Vacant Open Challenge
Kayu Zakisaka vs. Vacant

Kayu fought valiantly against Vacant but after the second time she was knocked down she could not get back up in time before the ref counted to ten.

Scene: Vacation Skeleton returns from the hospital and demands a match against Goat-Monster, but announces that like everything else he won’t take it seriously. Goat-Monster agrees to murder Vacation Skeleton again next week.

#7 Legion Tag Championships
oRa 66 vs. Pineapple Pizza ©

What a great match. Firestar and Angus proved that they can work as a team by finishing the match with stereo Ushigoroshis. Angus pins Pine Appel

Scene: Dash Rendar occupies the press conference stage and challenges the tag champs on his own to a title match next week. What an idiot.

yerpalhal · March 3, 2019, 3:00pm

Angus; welp sucks fir the veggie tales or whoever they are. I finally found a tag partner worth her weight in gald…this gald

-taps his belt-

noo as fir the soon tae be died man bring it on rendar me an firestar will set yuir ass on fire…or blaw ye up its oor gimmick after aw

Deathmaster780 · March 3, 2019, 5:22pm

Mina%20Headshot%202 거룩한 씨 발 공 형제! What a goddamned good time yo! Nothing makes victory taste so sweet like cheating to win. Angus my dude, lets go out drinking to celebrate! Somewhere that has pizza, I really want Pizza right now for some reason.

Mina%20Headshot%202 Oh yeah right, before we go, Dash. I almost feel bad about the fact that me and Angus are gonna destroy your ass at the PPV…HAHAHA just kidding, I’m going to see how much fire it takes to make a spaceman fly. 당신을 사랑, 안녕!

Skips out of the arena while spooting off dual flame throwers

IGgy · March 6, 2019, 3:54pm

It’s time for wrasslin’ again in the usual place at the usual time.

This week we’ll raise some hell!

We’ll have Mask vs. Mask Match in which HazMatt and Chief Engineer try to settle their hazmat-suit related feud once and for all.
Vacation Skeleton will probably be destroyed by Malfest Goat-Monster.
Dash, that fool, is challenging the oRa 66 for the Legion Titles on his own.
And Flamander will take a shot at Suzan’s OHPW Infernal Hellweight Title.
Among other things, of course.

Here’s the match card:

#2 Seven Deadly Pins (Interval Battle Royale)
Roy vs. Rick Wreckage vs. George Cluwney vs. Maya Northwind vs. Weeb Weaver vs. Inspector Jane vs. Palpatine vs. Fomore ©

#3 Singles Match
Kayu Zakisaka vs. Black

#5 Singles Match
Vacation Skeleton vs. Malfest Goat-Monster

#8 VACANT OPEN CHALLENGE
Someone vs. Vacant

#9 Cage Match - Mask vs. Mask
Chief Engineer vs. HazMatt