Week 70: List of Misdeeds
On one hand I feel sorry for Plumeria having to go against someone as dominant as Dash has been since his transformation to godhood, since he’s only there because I hate him so much that I don’t really need much of an excuse to put him in the Jabroni Royale for the millionth time. Ah well.
Last week was Sexton’s last Young Devil match in OHPW, this week will be Tara’s. With the Bunny Title gone and VACANT’s Open Challenge happening more rarely now we have more time to actually give people singles matches. We even got some of our Main Eventers just having matches here, Check out Freddie in the four-way, Flamander standing in the way of ASS as she tries to add him to her list of Bosses she’s beaten. And Maya is up against Pantha! Curious to see how that’ll go. And finally, in our main event, we got SoS make an attempt at winning the Legion Tag Titles from Pineapple Pizza
Scene: Dash is dumb as fuck (hands over the List of things he thinks he did to Vacation Skeleton and it turns that never happened. But VS promises to pretend to be mad anyway.
#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
Plumeria (“c”) vs. Dash Rendar
Oh shit, this went bloody quick! There were only two bad things about this match. First: Dash was in it. Second: Dash survived the explosion and won…
#2 Singles Match
Tara McFly vs. Nawt A Robutt
Tara Mcfly graduated from being a Young Devil by taking the Tokyo Thunderwave of Death 20XX
#3 Singles Match
Super Samio vs. Weeb Weaver
Nice quick match that went to Weeb after they did their finisher for the first time… now the finisher is the Tarantula, a submission that uses the ropes for leverage. So it’s illegal. But they won with a 450 splash immediately afterwards.
#4 Four-Way
Josef Dub vs. Undeddie Guerrero vs. Freddie Hope vs. Team Skull Grunt Blue
Two notorious lowblowers and one occasional lowblower and one guy who doesn’t do that stuff. This match was exactly what you’d expect. Excpet for the fact that the least likely person won. Blue pins Freddie!
#5 Singles Match
Arcade Legend ASS vs. Hellranger Flamander
This match slapped. ASS took most of the offense, even taking three Snakes early on but managed to mount an impressive comeback before succumbing to the fourth and final snake.
#6 Singles Match
Maya Northwind vs. Pantha
Where the previous match was drawn out more, this one was fast and to the point. Pantha showed why she was champ and Maya proved that she can hang but ultimately couldn’t get the win against Pantha.
#7 Legion Tag Championship
School of Slam vs. Pineapple Pizza (c)
School of Slam debuted their revolutionary new tactic of not tagging every few minutes and guess what? It worked. Pineapple Pizza didn’t go down without a fight but all the heavy hits came from SoS, making them champs once more! Pineapple Pizza successfully defended the Titles two times.
