Summary
: The worst part is, I can’t tell if this is supposed to be a pun on Nakategawa being a pedophile or not.
: Anyway, this update is going to contain some uh.. ‘risque’ footage, people being very horny and creeping on idols, and a suicide. Nothing much happens in this update anyway, so feel free to skip to the end.
: “So, what’re you doing here? If you don’t have anything to do here, you should hurry up and go home. We’re pretty strict on tardiness here.”
: “Ah! I forgot… yeah, that’s right. I’d assigned you something. What was it again? Ah, the sketchy websites… so how was it? Ah, I see. So you went and collected this flier… I see. Good work.”
: “OK then, shall we get to it?”
: “Using a firewall to strengthen it up, that’s clever. Hm. Bingo…! Hm… so this is the famous ‘dark site’.”
: I like to think that during this, Big Dick is skating around the office and dialling numbers on the phones for no particular reason other than to enhance the late-90s hacker atmosphere.
: Big Dick wakes up the next day and there’s a giant cardboard box labelled “HACKER STUFF” in front of his door.
: “It’s OK. We’ve put reverb on it so I know the address. I wonder how this’ll turn out… keep up the good work. Please continue the investigation. I’m busy with plenty of things myself… goodnight.”
: “If crime had a shape, then the Mikumo case would be lead. Hard, unyielding, and heavy… you can feel the weight of it. Like.. it’s heavy.”
: If I was on the writing team for this game, I would absolutely have had Kusabi go “Sumio, you dumbass, lead isn’t a shape.”
: “Look, Sumio. Crime itself has no boundaries. Crime is crime. I’m sure this goes without saying. But, well, I get what you’re saying. That Mikumo stuff was the last of its kind.”
: “People got smarter. They decided they don’t want to touch on other people’s consciousnesses.”
: “Living every day, being exposed to the emotions of the masses, having to interact with people even when you don’t want to. That cycle can easily wear a person down.”
: “I wonder if from here on out this will change into some sort of lighter, easier form.”
: “Who knows… but a person’s emotions don’t just disappear. For example, take ‘evil’. It has to be transformed into actions. It’s the same as math. It depends on what equation you use.”
: You heard it here first, math is confirmed evil.
: “People choose the simplest equation, right? When something convenient is discovered, people adapt to that and grow. Well, some people call that ‘degeneration’, but…”
: “But about what you’re saying… Sumio, you’re just rationalizing what you’ve done. Rationalizing crime – just changing the process and method doesn’t make it a totally different act.”
: “However you try to twist it, you’re a killer. An unforgivable sinner.”
: “That’s pretty harsh…”
: “That’s because I’m a detective. It’s a given for people to try to take the easiest route. As long as a person is alive, that’ll keep going.”
: I hope you’re ready for more uh, exciting IRC action.
: This segment changes up the chat to be a little more readable, probably reflecting that different sites would obviously have different designs.
: Anyway, I’m going to post a brief summary because this is a very long, very pointless conversation: Furuya (as “oldman”) pisses off the Kamui cult, who threaten to kill him.
(stoney)
: here we go again(Jack)
: Graham, get rid of him.(Graham)
: oldman?
: what the hell?
: if you just wanna cause trouble
: then go do it somewhere else
: seriously, I’ll kill you.(Henry)
: OM,
: look, the people here
: can easily confirm all your
: bullshit about yakuza and or whatever
: they’ll find you
: This feels like reading through Homestuck all over again. I got maybe fifty pages into that before I gave up on it.
(oldman)
: you threatening me?
: i’ll report you to the sitemaster(Jack)
: here we go, trying to turn it
: around on us
: go ahead and report us(stoney)
: we’re used to it(sanderson)
: this is a bohemian site
: and by the way OM
: im the sitemaster
: your claim is frivolous
: im rejecting it(Henry)
: get the fuck out of here
: ill find you and kill your ass(oldman)
: can you really do it?
: for reals!
: bring it the fuck on if you
: think you can!
: Ah, the age of the internet tough guy.
(Henry)
: well…
: Jack, go for it(Jack)
: got it.
: sanderson,
: please send me the log
: i just need 15 minutes(sanderson)
: ok
: oldman, you seem pretty brave
: so go ahead and enjoy yourself
: here for a while
: thatll allow us to
: kill your ass for sure(Graham)
: lets decide on a motif
: how about alabama, 1974?
: I looked it up, and I have zero idea what Graham is talking about.
(oldman)
: fuck off!
: you think you can get through my defense?
: its impossible, dont even bother(Neutral)
: OM, you should run.
: you cant win this.
: these guys are net junkies.(Henry)
: huh??
: you betraying us, neutral?(Graham)
: hes just doing as his name says
: thats fair
: OM isnt gonna run away like that anyway
: right?
: OM(sanderson)
: lets see what we can do
: jack, im almost ready on my end
: send it over and ill attack immediately(Jack)
: youre sure in a hurry..
: just a bit more(oldman)
: you think you can kill me with sarcasm?(Neutral)
: these people here can(oldman)
: how?
: They could’ve cut off the chatlog here and it would’ve been enough.. but no. I’m not sure if this was less lame in 1999 or not.
(stoney)
: sanderson, is it ok to just
: leave him alone?(sanderson)
: stop it there
: neutral is a nice guy
: but this is to protect our place here
: we have to fight our enemies
: or this commune is finished
: i love this place
: i like it here,
: so i have no problem killing with him(Neutral)
: OK.
: im going now
: OM, keep it up and youre going
: to die, you know
: see you, everyone(Graham)
: bye(Jack)
: later(stoney)
: see you(sanderson)
: thank you(Henry)
: stay stafe(Jack)
: almost there..
: sanderson, you ready?(sanderson)
: yup, im ready(oldman)
: are you fuckers serious?(Henry)
: hes hella scared
(stoney)
: into his crotch(Henry)
: i bet hes already shit himself(Graham)
: wtf?(Henry)
: what?
: you know he is(Jack)
: ok lets knock this off
: its distracting
: i got this chat window open
: while im working(sanderson)
: hows it coming…?(Jack)
: ok, all ready to go
: sending now(oldman)
: psychos(Jack)
: psychos?
: maybe…
: but youre having fun, right OM?
: all this thrill just from simple text
: I mentioned it extensively in the P5R LP, but my brain just kinda shuts off in situations like these where I’m being bombarded with exposition that I really don’t care about, and this is definitely one of those.
(sanderson)
: once it comes true
: that gap is gonna be even more thrilling
: hey here it is, I just got it
: ok, you ready
: OM?(Jack)
: lets kill him(Henry)
: where at? i got the car ready(Graham)
: ok everyone, this is alabama
: so dont forget preparations
: I assume by ‘preparations’ he means having a bike in the back of your car in case there’s a football game nearby, because at that point the entire state is going to come to a halt.
(stoney)
: ok, ill set up
: the offline party(sanderson)
: you ready too, OM?
: everyones so excited, we havent
: hunted in a while
: your address is…
: I stopped attempting to learn Japanese months ago, and the katakana here is too screwy for me to read much of. I can tell the last three characters are “Sa-ya-ka”, which is what this segment is about.
: This segment is probably the horniest I’ve ever seen Suda get, and that’s including No More Heroes.
: I would like to mention that it is implied Big Dick is searching for horny anime content. This is not the case. Big Dick is a chinchilla and has no interest in human women, unlike a certain cat-shaped shadow.
: No, you’re doing it all wrong! You don’t want to wear a swimsuit when eating watermelon, it drips all over the place. Now you’re gonna have to shower again.
: “What?”
: “Was the debriefing today…?”
: “Huh? You haven’t heard? The show’s being broadcast live.”
: “Show? What show?”
: “Sayaka Baian, the idol.”
: “Baian? What, that’s not so rare, is it?”
: “An idol concert means it’ll be broadcast on the Internet, right?”
: “Are you two really detectives? Secretly filmed footage of Baian.”
: “Really? You sure it’s not just a fake?”
: “Totally naked. They sold the password on underground PPV…”
: “How much?”
: “150,000.”
: “Did you buy it?”
: “With your own money?”
: “No.”
: “From the budget?”
: “I’m going to say, yeah.”
: So wait, is he or is he not a pedophile?
: “You think it’ll work?”
: “Yeah.”
: “What about the boss?”
: “Two for 300,000?”
: “Yes.”
: “From the budget?”
: “Of course - it’s part of an investigation.”
: I like to think that at this point, Big Dick shrugs, takes the department credit card, and then uses it to go on a lavish spending spree at an underground chinchilla club.
: They have grass that isn’t even legal in Japan, and expensive sunflower seeds imported from Europe.
: “Jesus Christ..”
: “OK, it’s starting.”
: I like that this is supposed to be a hidden camera thing, yet there’s cameras at multiple angles, including one close enough for her to be looking directly into.
: Even though the plot says it is, I like to think that Nakategawa paid like $2200 for some generic clip from a porn site, and it’s not even Sayaka Baian in the footage.
: Nakategawa and Kotobuki have a combined mental age of about 12.
: I’d like to talk a little about this, because it actually relates to something I talked about in Tsuki. Remember how I said that Japan’s press freedom ranking slipped in the 2010s and never really stopped?
: Recently, the Japanese government passed a law that makes “online insults” punishable by up to a year in prison or a fine of up to $2200.
: That law was passed as the result of the high-profile suicide of Hana Kimura, who I think I talked about briefly in the P5R LP. Hana Kimura was a pro wrestler who went on reality TV and developed an online hatebase, because that’s how idol culture works.
: Anyway, there’s serious concerns that the “anti-bullying” law could be used against journalists or people criticizing Japan’s government or politicians.
: “She was killed instantly. Yesterday, Baian had live footage of her private life exposed on the Internet, and upon learning this from her manager, she apparently went into shock and threw herself from the roof of the building.”
: “This isn’t a news report. Just say it normally.”
: “I am. Back to the topic at hand… just after the report of Baian’s suicide, the Telecommunication Crimes Unit found the host.”
: “Eleven people, made up of part-timers and unemployed people, all thought to be members of a hardcore Baian fan club, were arrested.”
: I’m willing to bet it was Konami.
: “So basically, they required high-spec machines and plenty of disk space. They partitioned and customized some of the computers used.”
: “The eleven suspects used their own home computers as hosts and passed the huge access numbers onto the other PCs.”
: “So they were hackers?”
: “Not exactly. Corporate networks with half-assed network administration are relatively easy to get into. You could get access with even just basic knowledge.”
: “Exactly. A lot of the fan club members worked part-time at the company. So they got information from other employees which made getting into the network easy.”
: “Is that even possible?”
: “It’s definitely not impossible at all.”
: “As I just said, it’s relatively easy.”
: “That’s scary. Are we safe here?”
: “I’ll take care of it, so yes.”
: “I see. So they went this far for Sayaka Baian…”
: “The eleven people arrested think they’re heroes, and are apparently looking to get picked up by the media.”
: “Hey, Hachisuka. Did you break up with your boyfriend or something? That short bob looks good on you…”
: “Funny to hear you say that!”
: “I bet you recorded it, didn’t you?”
: “Of course. I had to at least break even.”
: Some police force they have there.
: “Gross…”
: “As a woman, you sympathize with her, right?”
: “Not especially… I’m not interested.”
: “How cold… some messed up fans take this celebrity’s life, and the footage of her gets out into the world, and countless numbers of people peek into her private life. You don’t feel sorry for her?”
: “Should I? That was her job, wasn’t it? As long as her customers have needs, isn’t it her job to fulfill them?”
: “Damn…”
: “Anyway, I’m really not interested. Some idol kills herself and everyone reveres her for it. It’s somewhat common, isn’t it…?”
: “Fucking hell… is it really that bad, Naka?”
: “In a way, thanks to some of her fans, she’ll be able to shine forever now. She’s become a sort of legend..”
: “That’s kind of sad. It happens a lot, but she must’ve been lonely.”
: “But it was a manufactured loneliness.”
: I mean, if Oshi no Ko is anything to go by, it might not be.
: There’s no way this wasn’t shot at whatever building Suda was in prior to forming Grasshopper.
: The audio for this loops and becomes increasingly distorted as the video goes on.
: I’m gonna go ahead and say there’s no way this particular shot isn’t an out-take where the actress burst out laughing.
: This is almost the exact facial expression I made every time Maruki came on screen in Persona 5 Royal.
: Oh man. She’s not playing games, she knows that’s plastic love.
: And that’s this part of Kamuidrome over. There’s still plenty more, enough that I’m not sure I’m going to get through it all in the next update. Next time, we’ll watch as the plot devolves into something that’s more or less Fight Club.