Part 168
Part 168: 12/7: Taking Out The Trash
When last we left off, Shido was only one letter of introduction away from being completely undermined. But I’m suuuuure those Phantom Thieves won’t get any further. That would be just impossible.
Also worth noting: we’re officially done with Hallway Simulator 2017. Thank fuck.
Music: Ark
Just that cleaner dude left then. Wanna go cause a scene somewhere and lure him out?
As I’ve already said, we should avoid doing that if we can.
But we’ve gone everywhere on the map. Is there any place we haven’t checked yet…?
Hm? I don’t recall ever passing by such a place.
Wait, I found something… The engine room. Remember how you were wondering about that smoke earlier, Skull?
Oh yeah… Where was that?
Back down on the main level of the side deck, the thieves find this vent.
I’m getting a reading from inside, but I can’t tell if it’s him.
Huh? We ain’t gonna be able to get in like this. You wanna try forcin’ it open, Joker?
OK, let’s do it!
But his men are with him too. Exiting here will land us directly in front of them. There will be no chance of escape at that point. What do you think, Joker?
Very well. We shall jump in!
I said you’re off the hook, didn’t I? You got guts, bro.
Crap, this guy might be just a cognition, but he’s damn scary!
I’m too busy to deal with you punks now. I’ll be leavin’ that to my men here.
This fight is just more Baphomets and is therefore a complete joke. Melchizedek has Mahamaon and can thus instakill all of them in a single turn. Get some better henchmen. I am of course referring to the cleaner, not Shido. That would be absurd, as Shido is perfect. Shido cannot fail, he can only be failed.
Look, over there!
Dammit, we’re not lettin’ him escape! Let’s take that letter by force if we gotta!
Bead Chain and a Diamond, not terrible.
Our target appears to be within this room. We have cornered him thus far, so let us look for a way inside.
They’re holed up in this room…
Agh, dammit! He locked the door!
This won’t do. We can’t exactly give up on the letter either… Is there some way in…?
…but the door is impassible. They’ll need to find another way in.
Climbing up on these containers allows the thieves to reach another duct they can crawl through.
This will be our final letter of introduction! We must get it!
Very well! It is time we put an end to this charade!
You punks… You snuck in again!?
The cleaner removes his jacket.
Music: Tension
WHAT DID YOU THINK HE WAS DOING, YOU MORONS
Crap…! Is he really yakuza?
IT seems that bastard Shido has close ties to the underground…
How are we supposed to get the letter of introduction from him? Do we have to prove our worth?
Well, if you have any pattern recognition at all, everyone except Skull, Mona, and Fox have had some one-on-one session with the targets to prove their mettle, so I guess it’s gonna be one of them who gets it for us.
I’m a busy man. I gotta deal with cleanin’ up problems and all them mental shutdowns, after all. If you got business with me, just spit it out already.
May I please have the letter, kind sir?
A letter of introduction? Why the hell would I give you one?
Music: Wicked Plan
A tattoo?
Yep, it’s Fox’s turn.
I thought you’d be able to do it, Yusuke…
Ixnay on the fucking names, jesus christ!
What’re you squabbloin’ about?
Yusuke, draw something! Art’s art, ain’t it!?
…… …Very well. May I at least decide what I draw?
Uh uh. I won’t accept anything ‘cept a godly phoenix fitting for my godly personality.
A phoenix… I’d rather something else…
Makin’ excuses now, mister “artist”? You’re all talk. People like you are a dime a dozen.
I am not all talk. I can draw anything you want. Bring me a brush and a piece of paper.
It should be emphasized that Skull sounds hilariously pissed here.
…Is it a monster? It has some kinda crazy aura…
A truly… explosive piece…
This is my perception of a phoenix.
I get that this thing is wrong for a yakuza tat, but I personally think the rest of the Phantom Thieves are a bunch of whiners here and that Fox’s drawing looks fucking badass.
Thank you.
It seems like… it went well…?
Well then, I request a letter of introduction.
I decline.
Music: Desire
No letter for you then.
I must decide my own path as an artist. I will not receive aid from others any longer. Now if you understand, hand over the letter. Otherwise, we’ll just have to take it by force. By the way, you’re more feral pigeon than phoenix.
We’re still gonna fight after all that!?
The Shadow Cleaner is unique among minibosses in that he actually has a semi-unique model (albeit just a palette swap of Fuu-Ki). (Nope! It’s just an Ongyo-Ki!) He also has a shitload of health. This fight is a bit annoying and took over eight minutes, which is about double what a miniboss normally takes.
He’s capable of using Maeigaon to hit everyone with Heavy Curse damage, using Myriad Slashes for a bunch of physical hits on one party member, and can increase ailment susceptibility with Foul Breath (one target) and Stagnant Air (everyone, including himself). While he doesn’t have any status ailments to inflict on us, I’m pretty sure they also increase the hit rate for instakill skills, which he does have in the form of Mudoon, a Curse skill. He can use (Ma)Rakunda to lower Defense and Tarukaja to raise his Attack, as well, plus Heat Riser to increase all three of his parameters.
I don’t think he has a weakness, but if he does I don’t know it. Thankfully, One-shot Kill from Astarte has a high crit rate. I also left out the best part of all this, which is that he gets two turns. Joy. This is where I started dipping into my reserve of Takemedic-All-Zs to replace my lack of Mediarama.
Anyway, the Phantom Thieves kick his ass.
That’s all five!
Music: Suspicion
You’ve got some backbone. All right, I’ll give you my letter. Normally I’d have to “clean” you guys up for messin’ around on the ship, but… there’s no point now.
Uh, why is this dude not cowering and repentant like all the other cognition/Shadow hybrids? Is he just a cognition? If so, why did he go berserk? Actually, never mind. Here’s the only important question here: Why is he suddenly wearing clothes again?
You’re letting us go?
This place ain’t gonna last much longer if powerful soldiers like you guys got in here. Time for me to jet. The captain was great n’ all, but he’s gonna have to go down with this ship alone. See ya later, kiddos.
Politicians never get too close with their shady connections. They must have only been linked monetarily.
How do you know that, Noir? Is there something you’re not telling us?
That must be it.
Well, we finally have all five. We need to use these to get into the main assembly hall, right?
Yes, and I believe that will be where we find the Treasure. We’ve been to most other places to gather the letters—there’s almost no doubt about it.
We’re gonna take his Treasure, no matter what!
As I’m sure you all know, the importance of this particular card is unlike any that’s come before. Once we send it, our opponents will know that Joker, who they presumed dead, is in fact still alive. We will be putting our backs to the wall.
If we lose, our lives will truly be over…
We can’t let that happen, can we!?
Hell yeah!
Then it’s decided.
The real question is, how and where do we send the calling card?
How about we make it super flashy? Our whole big plan was all for this moment, you know!
Actually, it must be theatrically done. A minor leak will only be crushed by Shido’s influence.
Maybe it doesn’t have to be in letter form this time.
Hehe… It’s finally my turn to steal the spotlight.
…What’s the matter?
Heeheehee… It’s nothing.
Well, there’s no use in thinking about it here. Let’s head back for now.
Music: Ark
It was quite the feat, but we can finally open that door! Let’s take the Treasure!
It won’t be that easy, Phantom Thieves, for Lord Shido wi—actually, you know what? Fuck it. The Phantom Thieves have chewed up and spit out everything you’ve thrown at them, and I know which way the wind is blowing. I’m siding not just with the winning team, but the right team. You have nothing left, man, and the Phantom Thieves are just getting warmed up. Say your prayers.
Man, it’s good to not feel like I’m under some shitlord’s heel anymore. Even if I get a mental shutdown, this is worth it. Time to kick back and watch the Phantom Thieves do their thing.
There’s no obstacles left between us and victory now. Let’s just head back to where the Treasure is and we can call this a day. I’m positive there’s nothing that can possibly stand in our way.
Music: Desire
ah fuck
Hmph… I’m impressed that you managed to deceive me. It seems I underestimated your abilities.
Who cares? My targets were all doing the same damn thing in this eat or be eaten world. All I did was remove their evil from society. How is that any different from the Phantom Thieves?
In just a few weeks, my plan would have come to fruition…! But no, you just had to interfere…! I can still take it back though. I’ll just need to kill you all.
That wasn’t Robin Hood… Could it have been a different Persona?
But… I…!
You are the trash of society…!
…You’re so lucky. Lucky to be surrounded… by teammates who acknowledge you… And once Shido confesses his crimes, you’ll all be heroes. As for me, people will find out my past deductions were just charade. My fame and trust will vanish.
Captain Shido’s orders… He has no need for losers. Well… this just moves the plan up a little. He was going to get rid of you after the election anyway.
You’ve been nothing but a puppet from the very beginning.
Let’s go, Joker.
Your soul shall burn a brilliant crimson with my hellfire. Now then… take up your mask.
I shall stay by your side in the form of a mask. Now, show me your power to change yourself in battle!
We finally secured our route to the Treasure! All we need to do now is send the calling card.
That means we’re ready to send the calling card too. When should we do it?
We must consider the method by which we will send it as well.
All those guys cheering for Shido better be ready. We’re gonna surprise the shit outta them!
I can’t wait for this.
Well…
It’s about Akechi-kun, is it not? That was really sad what happened to him… Honestly, I have mixed feelings… but I think he was a victim too.
He might be small, but don’t underestimate him. His quick movements will decimate you!
I’m here with you! Just remember what we practiced!
It’s strange that no one like him has come forward until now.
He is so charismatic. Upper management could learn a thing or two from him…
He only thinks of people as stepping stones for his own personal gain. …… Father… Father, is this the type of person you fought to protect us from? …I will fight against this injustice with my own power. I’ll be all right. I have Sis and the Phantom Thieves on my side. So… watch over me, OK?
In this case, what kind of crime could the person who fired the gun be tried for? A: Attempted murder/B: Involuntary manslaughter/ Which of these is correct? Yuo be the judge!
This was kind of a mean question. The answer is A, but this is two cases of attempted murder… You’ll get charged with the same crime, even if someone just happened to get wrapped up in it.
It would be pointless to send it to the Diet Building.
What shall we do then…?
snickering
You shoulda told us you were plannin’ something!
It’s kickass!
…start with national news. Since the young man suspected to be the leader of the Phantom Thieves died while in custody, the police have officially announced that these crimes have come to an end, and assure everyone that the peace will be restored–
I dunno, and we can’t switch it out! Seems we aren’t the only ones affected either!
The hell!? It was getting good!
Oooh, the police reacted much faster than I thought.
You think it’s some kinda prank?
Yes. Before that happens, we will take this country!
I’ll crush them beneath my heel!
What did they mean when they said “nobody has died”!? Could they have installed a new leader just to threaten us and Shido!?
Excuse me…
This isn’t the time for games!
Um, I really don’t know what you’re speaking of… Oh, but that reminds me… I received a calling card from the Phantom Thieves… but everything from then on is a blur…
Did the Phantom Thieves get to her…?
Search the place.
Oh, you mean those guys they’ve been talking about on TV?
I hear what Shido-san is saying, but is it true?
But don’t you think that Shido looks like a criminal too?
I don’t know what to believe anymore…
This has me excited as well. snicker That boy really keeps the news rolling in.
I guarantee it.
Aww, I wish I’d gone straight home! I could’ve seen it in person in Shibuya that way!
I knew they were up to no good the moment that stuff came up. I bet they’re just a bunch of scumbags.
…Not that it matters. If you have a complaint, I’m willing to listen.
I will crush any who stand in my way!
I will crush any who stand in my way!
You will regret your actions. …You’ve angered me for the last time.
Yes…
According to Wakaba Isshiki’s research… Temporarily collapsing a Palace will take down anyone inside it as well. The abrupt nature of the collapse means they will be unable to escape without extreme luck.
Let’s go!
It’s too far! We won’t reach it in time…!
Ryuji!
Hang on!
Medicine…?
Should we get him to a hospital…?
We should probably wait and see a little longer…
Everything will be ruined!
Announce that he’s not feeling well!
I was taken to that asshole Shido’s place, but they suddenly told me I could go home. That’s thanks to his change of heart, right?
Right!? Anyway, have you heard of Shiro Asakura? It seems like he’s behind these crimes. Well, I’ll be counting on you for the rest!
The look on your face seems to be that of a man who has accomplished a great deed.
To think you would use the trap set against you to entrap them… I’ve never seen a dramatic resurgence such as that. Truly marvelous—those are the only words I can think of to describe you.
Or… could it be that it’s not a dream at all? My memories aren’t any closer to coming back to me… But might there be something I’m supposed to remember…? ……
And then, there’s that calling card… Shido-san denied any of it was true though.
I wonder if Shido-san is OK… I’m worried, with the elections so close.
Just by looking at his eyes, you can tell that he’s trustworthy. Who can we believe in, if not him?
So much happened this year! Our question is “What single word describes this year for you?” Predictably, many are saying the word “thief.” Yes, the Phantom Thieves were a big deal.
Did anything actually good happen this year? Just thinking about the future depresses me.
Woof! Woof!
Um, I heard from my teacher that dogs can’t live as long as people. I might have to say bye-bye to you soon…
As you can see, though small in numbers, there are supporters for the Phantom Thieves. Should the opinions of those people be ignored?
Do you know what you’re being called online?
I can only request this of you, my right-hand man, for you are the one who saved me!
G-Great Sun God…! I will follow you!
Don’t you think Masayoshi Shido and Akechi-kun look alike somehow?
So that Shido person was the bad guy? The Phantom Thieves were right all along?
Well, it may not be that simple. On the internet, people are speculating it’s a hoax by Shido’s political rivals.
I bet it’s a trick meant to discredit Shido-san somehow! That’s what the talk shows are saying—that it’s just slander due to the elections.
It’s not too late for you. You should settle things once and for all. I decided to start facing my own crimes from now on. I was saved, thanks to the Phantom Thieves. That’s why I got so excited when I heard that they’re alive. That really made me happy. You’re still young. Make sure to live life to the fullest, so you don’t have regrets like I do.
Well, they picked a fight with Shido, right? Think it’ll affect the election?
Didn’t seem like it phased him. I mean, he denied it, so…
I see… So you’re my opposing candidate… No, you’re working to overthrow the regime!
What!? What are you talking about, Senpai!?
Yep. You get it! Any new prime minister will work to “purify” Shinjuku of guys like me. No way am I down for that. Anyway, you wanna become a Phantom Thief with this radio wave jacking kit?
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Shido’s pretty much gone into hiding. They all say he’s fallen ill or something.
That’s the total opposite of what you said before. But you know, I admire your shamelessness.
Japan’s finally on a roll. I LOLed at this huge news right near the end of the year.
So… Are you Team Shido or Team Phantom Thieves?
A Sincere Omelette, correct!? As you wish Master.
There’s overwhelming support for Masayoshi Shido’s party…
Right? Ya can’t trusht that Shido guy! I would never drinksh wi’ the guy! He’d not pour me any sake, jus’ to dishrepeck me… burp
When I asked my parents, they just said they didn’t care who…
Our parents only care about our entrance exams. They won’t listen to anything we tell them.
You mean people like Masayoshi Shido? I hear whoever’s left from the Phantom Thieves is spreading lies. I haven’t looked into it, myself.
Well, forget about it and just knock one back with me! All I care about is livin’ it up, dude!
Actually, I thought it was kind of funny. In the end, it’s not really my problem. I care more about preparing for the year-end party than any scandals linked to Mr. Shido.
Is this some kind of trick? The police said he was dead. I guess this is just par for the course—there’s always a scandal when it comes to politicians.
Well, I don’t agree with the Akechi hatewagon!
Same thing happened with the Phantom Thieves. Just goes to show that no one thinks for themselves. We’re the only ones who’ve stayed true. We’ll be devoted until death do us part!
Bein’ here’s made it clear—Tokyo ain’t for me. Now’s as good a time as any, what with the election.
It’s just too much for Bryson to handle! He’s collapsed!
Well, no, not really. They did manage to stop all the attacks on my blog though. The internet is so distracted by their comeback, no one has been attacking me for praising myself. Ah, their return to heroic form was truly smashing. It’s inspired me to be more courageous too. I shall watch what becomes of them while preparing to take dramatic action of my own in my career.
I’ll let you go if you can satisfy me, blorp! You’ll have three chances, blorp!
Give me a number to open the gate, snap! I’ll give you three chances, snap!
If you don’t give me a number I like, I’m gonna blast you all the way back to the beginning!
Not that I asked for your opinion on the election. Well, no matter what the cause was, this election is heading in the right direction.
I’m so surprised they’re still updating that. Which side is winning, anyway?
Not many people voted “Yes.” And there’s not much going on in the comments.
So the deceitful thief who ravaged the world has shamelessly entered this infernal domain… I shall show you the true tortures of hell… At least, I would… but it’d be boring to treat the famous Goemon the same as any old person. Instead, we shall use the two dice in my hand for a little game. I call it… odds or evens!
Behind the scenes though, you guys must be making lots of money. Tell me how you do it.
I don’t think you’re cut out for it.
Oh, you’re getting the wrong idea. I’m just allowing them to promote themselves. They don’t understand that you have to pay a price to survive in this cutthroat industry. By the way, you guys seem like you’re pretty popular. Why don’t I be your producer? If I manage you, you could become household names in show business.
All you gotta do is listen to what I say!
I will become your new mask and take control of your destiny…
The might of my hammer shall find a new home within your mask.
I ask for the support of you, my constituents!
This can’t be true! Shido-san!
Hell yeaaaaah!
Come now, don’t be that way.
I was able to settle a debt in regard to my father as well.
We all worked so hard for this…
Well, overall, Shido’s new party won by a landslide… However, there are some who support my arguments. The world isn’t all bad. Without you, none of this would have been possible. Thank you. The true battle is about to begin. Let’s both work hard.
If a case is assembled against him… everything about us will be exposed too… What are we supposed to do…?
Prosecutor Niijima is serious about taking Shido-san to court, right!?
Yes, I’m aware… But even if we prevent her from doing so, what about the public? Shido-san’s conduct was shameful…
The year’s already ending, huh? So much has happened that it’s like “where did all the time go?” Oh, but it’s not over for you yet. You still have finals for three days, from tomorrow to the 22nd.
Yeah, yeah. It’s still night, OK? You’re in a better mood than usual, aren’t you?
I wanted to thank you again for all your support. With the next generation, I will change this county into one that overflows with justice!
This is a bench press. It will increase your strength, of course. It’ll also make you mentally stronger since you need to keep a consistent rhythm and form.
I had high hopes for him… It’s unacceptable for Japan to be without a prime minister. I hope he steps back up to lead this country…
Yes. Honestly, there’s no one more qualified than Shido…
How can people still believe in him…?
……
Oh, well. All of that stuff pretty much has nothing to do with us.
You went back to your parents’ place, right? Well, let’s make this next year a good one. I feel this weird vibe in the air. I wonder if it’s because of all the election chaos. The information the mass media is showing is pretty complicated, and it’s getting me frustrated.
It’s like none of it ever happened. Pretty insane, if you ask me.
I pretty much failed all my finals. I’m so screwed…
You just need to adopt a new mindset. Get a fresh start in the spirit of the new year. Still, the year could have ended better. I mean, we still haven’t decided on a prime minister.
Well, there’s been a big change in government. We can make that same kind of change next year!
No, I voted for someone named Yoshida. He’s not the kind of politician who stands out though.
So he’s plan and simple like you? That’s hilarious!
Remember I still have this guitar/Don’t forget, I still have this song/ Hm, something’s not right… The whole city seems like it’s in a daze… The big bad got his just desserts, and that totally rocks, but… Where’s all the excitement?
The politician who’s supposed to lead our country has fallen ill…
It’s the same sort of tragedy that happens in every era. Heroes fall before reaching their goals.
Hey… You can cry if you want. You don’t have to hold it in.
But the Phantom Thieves never even existed? So, what we saw was… what? An illusion?
meow?
Damn… I’m dead…
Don’t open the cells, OK? I have no intention of leaving this place…!
Removing your restraints is not allowed. Outsiders… must be eliminated!
no, you’re not doing this
I finally get to live without having to think for myself now.
I mistakenly thought myself to be talented… but now I think I’m a fool for wanting too much.
I’m done actin’ like a big shot. Who cares if I’m stupid? It’s not like you get punished for bein’ dumb. Nobody needs to strive to be more than they really are.
Hmph, I won’t deny that you’ll need it to continue onward. But mark my words, you’ll never get your hands on it. After all, you’ll have to go through me to do so!
I’ll hunt you down and skin you if you dare cheat on me. I’m your mask now… You better be ready.
Your soul shall act as a tool to transform my dauntless might into an unstoppable mask.
The Prison of Regression is representative of the collective desires of humanity. They wish to be chained down, surrender their cognition, and neglect the world around them… These feebleminded commonfolk will make your “social reform” all for naught. The shared heart of the masses has fallen into an excess of indolence and transformed into a prison.
My shine is proof that they desire my existence. As long as humanity yearns for me, I shall never perish…
