Roll Boss Rush is a 2D Action Platformer that consists of nothing but boss fights and ‘’’’’’’‘sexy’’’’’’’’’’ Robot Master girls.
You play as Megaman’s sister Roll, but not the one from the games, rather, the one from the Ruby Spears Megaman Cartoon.
There are 4 difficulty levels (which only affect how much damage you take). You choose one main weapon (burst because all the rest are objectively worse) and one sub-weapon (vacuum-toaster-saw, none of which matter). You can also now choose between fighting 1 or 2 bosses at the same time (mono-melee) regardless of difficulty level, which is basically impossible without constant bug abuse.
During battles Roll can commit a sex crime on your enemy and absorb their power to use it against them. Roll can even perform some Street Fighter moves if the loading screens deign to tell you about them, such as a drop kick. You also have a super meter that allows you to perform a SUPER MOVE, like in Street Fighter.
Each boss has a weakness, but the weapons are so horrifically unbalanced you won’t bother with most of them. At the end of each battle, you’re given a grade based upon your performance (with prizes for high ranks that are only useful if you’re getting low ranks), an information Token to trade for boss weaknesses, and a Password.
So without further ado: Let’s begin.
Roll Boss Rush #1: Shader Support (Heavy Sigh, Shinryu, Combat Lobster)
So… 11 years, huh? I would have thought that was enough time to reconsider any part of this, but I guess not.
Mega Man 7 actually gives us a sneak peek at this game’s version of Dr. Wily.
And we’re back with the Magic of Airbrush Tools Vol.2.
Roll Boss Rush #2: MIDI Enabled (Heavy Sigh, Combat Lobster, and Jspades)
This update right here is how you can tell this game was still actively worked on in 2019.
Roll Boss Rush #3: Geometry Transformation (Heavy Sigh, Combat Lobster, Jspades, and Shinryu)
Photosensitivity warning for this episode.
Roll Boss Rush #4: Texture Mapping (Heavy Sigh, Combat Lobster, Jspades, and Shinryu)
This video contains PRODUCT PLACEMENT.
Roll Boss Rush #5: Celebrity Endorsement (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shirnyu, and Combat Lobster)
This is the part of the game that forced the creator to give up on his original vision.
Roll Boss Rush #6: Sprite Warping (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shirnyu, and Combat Lobster)
Okay so with regards to the slowdown issue with the fish, I kind of had to check a few things.
The Playstation has 2 MB of RAM, with another 1 MB for VRAM and 512 KB of RAM for sound. I assume that the game loads all of the necessary level data (bosses and AI, background, etc.) straight to the RAM and not a constant data stream.
Jumping Flash, an early 3D platformer with polygonal and pretty sizable 3D levels, loads all of its level data to the RAM at once and runs pretty well for what it is.
This meas that either those fish take up way too much memory for what they are (probably unlikely) or the creator didn’t think to cap the number of fish visible onscreen to cause the Playstation to start chugging. Considering what’s been shown off of this game so far, that must’ve been a whole lot of fish to be distracted by in a fight that already has problems with some of the projectiles note being easily visible.
Warning: This video contains incredible voice acting.
Roll Boss Rush #7: Offscreen Rendering (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shinryu, and Combat Lobster)
SECRET CAMEO in this episode. Can you find him?
Roll Boss Rush #8: Pitch Modulation (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shinryu, and Combat Lobster)
Merry Christmas, everybody.
Roll Boss Rush #9: Rotation Engine (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shinryu, and Combat Lobster )
In todays level, we experience the wonders of knockback, as well as the gimmickiest fight in the game!
Roll Boss Rush #10: Clipping Allowed (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shinryu, and Combat Lobster)
Happy New Year, everybody.
Roll Boss Rush #11: Bust Processing (Heavy Sigh, Jspades, Shinryu, and Combat Lobster)
So, what part of this game stood out to you the most, dear viewer?
I just binged all the rest of the videos and oof I think I need to take some steps back. I still can’t get over how bad some of those boss gimmicks are. Some really need adjustments to make them okay but the standout ones are ones I can’t fathom how to really fix without a straight up redesign.
I reiterate: 11 years. Someone had 1.1 decades to realize this was a bad idea and somehow did not.
I mean I guess this could have ended on a boss rush if the author was feeling really lazy/cruel, but I’m not sure the actual final boss is “better.” I think it was a strictly horizontal move.
This game fucking sucks.
Like, I could try and be more specific about it, but what’s the point? Everyone knows exactly what’s wrong.
The LP was good though! Good job!
THE RIDE NEVER ENDS
Roll Boss Rush #12: THERE IS NO ESCAPE (Heavy Sigh, jspades, Combat Lobster)