Week 24: NO SHOW
This Saturday it is time for NO SHOW the sixth PPV of OHPW. Now our calendar is a little weird, but this means half a kayfabe year for the show! (In reality it’s more like 168 days, which the savvy among you will know is less than half a year, but the real half-year show would not happen to fall on a PPV, so…)
In any case, we got a loaded card. 13 matches! This might seem a lot, and it is. However it’s also less than it first appears. At least in terms of total runtime. Unless one or two run abnormally long…
We got Josef Dub sneaking his way into the Jabroni Royale match! We did not think this would happen but he got eliminated almost ten minutes before everyone else in the 7DP match. Speaking of: A couple returning challengers in the Seven Deadly Pins Battle Royal! Pine Appel most notably, who had a war the last time they were in a 7DP with Vacation Skeleton.
The Showdown Tournament continues with more B-Block match-ups! I could have had both blocks in there but don’t you think that’s a lot of matches already?
Harley challenged Apollo to a duel, which made Apollo angry enough to challenge Harley to a duel. So now we have duel! Palpy will challenge Freddie for the Darkweight Title. He is, of course, expected to lose. But people! The most important match is the one with the guest stars that have zero stakes in OHPW! I have secured us Alberto El Patron for NO SHOW! CM Punk will also be there making his return to wrestling? What a world to live in! The match will also feature Dante from the Devil May Cry Series!
And after that we got some throwaway match for our most prestigious title. Who’s the champ again? Pantha? Wait, someone beat Suzan? Ah well, she’ll defend against Mr. Shakedown.
Expected run-time - 2:30 hours
#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
Kayu Zakisaka © vs. Josef Dub
#2 Seven Deadly Pins
Pine Appel vs. Anna May vs. Manic Misanthrope vs. Guzma vs. A Mimic vs. Fomore vs. Great Maharaja vs. Vacation Skeleton ©
#3 Bunny Championship
Undeddie Guererro vs. Roy ©
#4-6 Showdown Tournament B-Block Round 2
N-T Punk vs. Cocademon
Ryu vs. Weeb Weaver
Cheese Pietzza vs. Malfest Goat-Monster
#7 Landmine Deathmatch
Kelsey Slaughter vs. Nawt A Robutt
#8 Legion Tag Championships
School of Slam vs. Team Skull ©
#9 Singles Match
Harley Havik vs. Apollo
#10 Underworld Darkweight Championship
Palpatine vs. Freddie Hope ©
#11 VACANT Open Challenge
Someone vs. VACANT
#12 Special Singles Match
Alberto El Patron??? vs. CM Punk???
#13 Infernal Hellweight Championship
Mr. Shakedown vs. Pantha ©