Week 102: Road to Hellfire II
Round 1 - Night 2
#1 VACANT Fuck You Challenge
CANCELLED due to excessive violence by VACANT. We are working on finding a replacement for our non-tournament openers.
Scene: [spoiler]Some guy called Johnny Fuckyou shows up and acts like the VACANT Fuck You Challenge was calling him out specifically. He demands to face VACANT who isn’t here because he’s in time-out for tearing Tara’s arms off. So instead Majin Bob Sapp will take on Challengers
#1 SAPP TIME! Challenge
Johnny Fuckyou vs. Majin Bob Sapp
Lotsa Puncing and some throwing. Kind of what you’d expect. Johnny has a Superman Punch he calls the “Fistful of Fuck You” in his arsenal. Which he does on Sapp, who then immediately gets up, Punches him much harder, pins him and wins. Fucking buried![/spoiler]
#2 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Ricc 2 Thicc vs. Blaze Rider
We see Blaze fighting formidably until Ricc decides to win via the Thicctory roll. That’s literally what it was. Classic Ricc. Too bad for Blaze Rider, she could have really come into her own in this tournament.
#3 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Not Your God vs. Nawt A Robutt
Two people who are not certain things and also have very contrasting styles. They both threw their best at each other. The Tokyo Thunderwave of Death 20xx, various holds and stuff. Eventually NYG submitted Nawt A Robutt with a move I’m not trying to pronounce.
#4 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Cock Thunder vs. Palpatine
Holy shit! Yes! The match was what it was, it didn’t even have the chance to blossom into anything. But the way it ended was glorious. Thunder suplexes Palpy and holds the bridge for the pin, but oh shit! It’s a rope break. So Thunder just keeps holding on for another suplex, this time releasing Palpy so he flies out of the ring and gets knocked out. Siiick!
#5 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Suzan Blades vs. Lea Lionheart
This match could find its identity moreso than the previous one, but it was still mostly defined by the finish. Which had Suzan hit Knightfall, but Lea kicks out. So Suzan decides to just do another Knightfall immediately. This time for the win.
#6 Well shit, don’t ask me.
The Skeletons (Bone Idol, Vacation Skeleton, Skullistair, IGgy) vs. The Abominations (Duckbaby, Boob, F.O.E., Sans)
This was as much of a shitshow as you’d expect. This was technically Lucha Tag rules, meaning if someone lands on the outside someone else can enter the ring and become the legal person. I don’t think that became relevant, though. Anyway, fun times were had until Boob locked the Sunken Chest on Skullistair for the win. What a party pooper!
#7 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Spitbal vs. Isabel Ibarra
We have not seen Isabel like this before. She just kept doing her Schoolboy Powerbomb over and over like it was going out of style and Spitbal took all this damage and still fought on. But Isabel followed with the Hijack Backbreaker, for some reason probably one of the most protected moves we have, and submitted Sptibal. However.
#8 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Grace Thoruson vs. Sexton Blud
Throughout the match Grace shows her experience by not allowing a big outside brawl with Sexton to happen. Because that’s where he’s the most likely to find a way to make himself bleed. Sexton, however, still finds ways tom make Grace bleed and make er bleed hard. Which only makes her angrier and eventually destroy Sexton’s legs enough for him to surrender to That Move Grace Keeps Winning With.
#9 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Freddie Hope vs. DivineCoffeeBinge
You’d call this an LPFWA throwback, but then you remember LPFWA had them in separate divisions so that couldn’t have happene.d However, the winner of this match move on to face Grace. DCB! chants are getting loud but Freddie his determined to move on in this tournament, even survives a transitional move from DCB, if only for the ropes. Freddie manages to keep DCB down for long enough after a double arm DDT to win the match.
#10 Hellfire Tournament Block B Round 1
Harmony Gray vs. Pantha
These to slapped the shit out of each other and it was good. Eventually, Pantha gained the upper hand and even though the Pantha Claw could not finish it it did enough damage for Pantha to win via Pinfall with a Pantha Suplex.
