Week 38: Day
Click here for the exact time of this Saturday’s show, as usual.
Before getting to the card for this week here’s another episode of Hell’s Gate
OHPW - Hell’s Gate #2: Battle Cocks - (Twitch VOD)
If you’re only gonna watch one match from that card I recommend the first one. Steve Dirt vs. Florida Man vs. Sexton Thicc in a Landmine Deathmatch. Many explosions and buckets of blood.
Here’s the Results
As for our regular show:
Punk doesn’t deserve to face Anus. He did nothing wrong. Then again, Anus is kind of on a downward spin, having lost to Family Man, so who knows how this will go. Flamander’s first match after losing the Bunny Title :3 and possibly the last before facing Freddie in two weeks.
Guzma, meanwhile, attempts to capture said Bunny Title :3 from Palpatine who may or may not be trying to match his reign from the LPFWA days. And in the Main Event, Canada attempts to recapture the Darkweight Title in a match against Ryu.
Scene: Lawful Good discuss that IGgy is looking for someone to investigate the attack on Door-Chan, and who else would they go to? Then IGgy comes and walks right past the two, entering the locker room of the obvious detectives: The Fun Gang! IGgy and The Fun Gang then discuss possible culprits but ultimately they know nothing.
#1 Jabroni Royale Deathmatch
N-T Punk (c) vs. Anus McMutton
#2 Tag Team Match
Space Wizards vs. Team Skull (Pink and Plumeria)
Grunt did a Tornado DDT on Jan for the win. The match was dangerously close to getting to 30 minutes.
#3 6-Way Elimination
The El Chad vs. Kayu Zakisaka vs. George Cluwney vs. Dash Rendar vs. Super Samio vs. Chief Engineer
Cocky as I am I decided to curse this match from the beginning, alluding to its length and using the Fight Forever chant. Thankfully, it didn’t quite go over an hour, but it was still over 40 minutes before Cluwney finally ended it all by submitting his tag partner Chief Engineer.
Scene: We got the camera crew into Freddie’s Dojo and he talks a bit about the facilities but then just rambles on. Clearly obsessed with the match against Flamander in 2 weeks.
#4 Singles Match
Flamander vs. Harley Havik
Flamander wins in a bit over 10 minutes. In the post-match attack, it looks like Harley is countering most of is post-match assault until he switches tactics.
#5 Bunny Championship :3
Guzma vs. Palpatine (c)
What clusterfuck. Both wrestlers brought their stables with them. The only one Absent was Blue. But he did show up by interfering in the match for a minute or two before returning back to the locker room to recover from his match from a week ago. Overall Team Skull were one short and Palpy ended up winning the match.
#6 VACANT Open Challenge
Undeddie Guerrero vs. VACANT
After most of the previous matches running long I was kind of expecting a 30-minute classic here. But VACANT defeated Undeddie in under 8 minutes.
#7 Underworld Darkweight Championship
Canada Alderman vs. Ryu (c)
After most of the previous matches running long I was kind of expecting a 30-minute classic here. But Ryu defeated Canada in less than 10 minutes.
