Colors Flying High - Let's Play Persona 5 Royal

In Star Trek V, Kirk can’t be mind-controlled because he’s a god. In P5R, John Persona can’t be seduced into the new reality because he’s an SMT protagonist with no ego or desire of his own, and thus has no wishes to have fulfilled.

Click Here for Update 106

newmascotresized: I really have to remember not to save at the end of a day, because the stupid “no recording” pop-up comes up every time you load.

Akechi: “Based on the look in your eyes, I’m guessing your friends aren’t going to be of any use to us.”

Akechi: “We need as much manpower as possible right now. I was hoping at least some of them would avoid being useless… but that seems to be beyond their capabilities.”

newmascotresized: There should have been an option to punch Akechi here and go it alone.

Akechi: “Well, there’s no point in griping about it out here. Are you ready? As I mentioned yesterday, it’s quite likely that we’ll have to confront Maruki physically. If you’re not prepared for such a contingency, then please go ahead and take care of your affairs as quickly as possible.”

newmascotresized: We could buy new gear for Akechi. I do not. He is being kicked out of the party as soon as I am no longer forced to use him.

Ryuji: “Whoa. Uh, hey guys…”

newmascotresized: I hate how fucking lazy this is. They’re using the same poses and animations from when you use the bottom floor of Leblanc as the hideout.

Haru: “Looks like we’ve all had the same idea.”

Yusuke: “Are you here to speak with Akira as well?”

Ryuji: “Uh, kinda… so, he’s not here?”

MorganaHuman: “He left around noon - said he was meeting up with Akechi.”

Futaba: “Sojiro said if we need to… talk about stuff, we can use this place for a while.”

Ryuji: “Cool.”

Ann: “You know… Akira asked me the other day… something along the lines of whether or not I’m okay with how things are. At first I didn’t know what he was talking about, but as he kept going, his words started to make my chest feel all tight…”

newmascotresized: Another rejected idea I had was having Salty Vanilla do a comic for Straight Joker where he breaks Maruki’s reality because everyone is in love with him.

Makoto: “…I know what you mean. And, ever since then, it’s like… like something isn’t right in my heart anymore…”

Yusuke: “I have no complaints about my current life - on the contrary, in fact. I am truly happy with it. So, in that case… what is this inkling of a feeling I have deep in my soul?”

Ryuji: “Ugh, dammit! I’m so bad at figurin’ out this sorta stuff. Hey… do ya think maybe we’re all runnin’ away from something super-important?”

Ryuji: “I’ve been kinda wonderin’ for a while now… maybe the reason Akira’s words hurt so much is 'cause he’s right. But I was too scared to admit that, for some reason. That’s why I pretended I didn’t understand what he meant…”

Haru: “When I was speaking with Akira, I felt like… I caught a glimpse of this mysterious sight. Something that shouldn’t have happened, but still… I felt like I shouldn’t turn away from it…”

newmascotresized: That was probably light reflecting off her forehead.

Ann: “Same here!”

Yusuke: “And myself as well. It seems that we really have lost sight of something precious to us after all…”

Futaba: “That… might be… but… but… I’m so scared to remember what it is! If I remember… ‘that,’ I feel like my life as I know it is going to end!”

newmascotresized: The writers do add in a little of what I wanted with Futaba, but it’s too little, too late. They’ve already shit their pants and cannot un-shit them.

Makoto: “Futaba…”

Futaba: “But, even still… I don’t want to feel this way anymore, either…”

Haru: “…Me too.”

Ryuji: “I guess that’s it, huh? Akira was tryin’ to tell us all somethin’ important, and I bet he’s probably still workin’ on it somewhere. Ain’t no way I’m gonna bail on him just so I can keep runnin’ from… whatever it is.”

Yusuke: “When I had that strange experience you all mentioned, I saw Akira and the rest of us there together. I want to believe the connection we share here is a genuine one.”

Ann: “Well, I know if we don’t do something soon, we’re gonna lose our connection with Akira… don’t ask how I know… it just feels like the truth to me.”

MorganaHuman: “I admit I am happy right now, but… I just can’t accept the situation as it is. I’m done with trying to escape my problems!”

newmascotresized: Oh, you were expecting we might get to see a human Morgana in a dungeon? This is Atlus we’re talking about. That would require effort… even though I’m 99% sure Morgana’s human model is just Joker’s with stuff slapped on it.

BlackMask: “We encountered an information guide after going up that elevator… if he intends to welcome us in so graciously, perhaps we’ll come across another guide soon.”

BlackMask: “Ah- Before I forget… I suspect the battles are going to get even tougher from here on out due to our lack of manpower. Focusing on our own abilities is fine and all, but depending on the situation, it’d be more efficient to team up.”

BlackMask: “The combination move we pulled off before… that wasn’t half bad. Of course… that all depends on whether or not you can keep up with me.”

newmascotresized: I had to record this part twice because today is the first chance to get Maruki’s bad ending, and on my first run I thought to myself, “There’s no way they’re going to let you just walk in through the front door again, right?”

newmascotresized: As it turns out, the route we took to get to Sumire the first time we were here still works.

BlackMask: “Just as I thought - they’re politely informing us of their location.”

newmascotresized: There’s really not much in this area. It’s a hallway with a couple of rooms coming off it that have nothing particularly interesting in them.

Marukevil: “Once her inner turmoil begins to settle, I’ll have her remember her life as she wishes to live it.”

BlackMask: “The life that she wishes for, huh? Call it what you like - you’re merely brainwashing people for your own satisfaction.”

newmascotresized: I have a feeling that up until the last minute, the writers knew NOTHING about Maruki. They didn’t know if they wanted him to be a villain or not, they didn’t know how his powers work, they knew nothing.

newmascotresized: I feel like I know what happened, too: the Royal devteam was going to make Maruki into a villain - he was going to be a cult leader and the whole “world without pain” thing was going to be global-scale brainfuckery instead of him actually warping reality.

newmascotresized: The only problem was that when they focus grouped it, the people who latched onto Akechi in the base game also latched onto Maruki - and they realized that if they made Maruki a villain, it might hurt sales.

newmascotresized: Instead, they decided “We’re going to be as milquetoast as possible and flip-flop constantly as to whether he’s a villain or not, effectively making a non-villain villain” and that’s how this shit came to be.

newmascotresized: Oh, and then there’s my actual point here: if he can alter reality, that’s not really brainwashing.

Marukevil: “I’m wholly aware that some will interpret my acts that way… but if that self-satisfaction leads to the happiness of thousands of others, don’t you agree that outcome is for the best?”

newmascotresized: By the way, when I was looking for a screenshot for the bad ending (I had to borrow footage because I didn’t feel like sitting through 20 minutes of credits) I found about a thousand YouTube videos of people going “WOULD YOU AGREE WITH MARUKI” and god fuck that shit.

Marukevil: “Kurusu-kun - if I understand correctly, you went and checked in on your friends this past week. This reality is the one that they all wished for… did any of them seem troubled by that fact?”

Marukevil: “Once you do, you’ll be just as happy as they are. Didn’t you see it yourselves? Your friends don’t just want to live these lives - they want you to choose this reality for yourselves and live happily too.”

newmascotresized: Here we have Cult Leader Maruki.

Marukevil: “Please, I want you to understand… for their sake, as well as yours.”

newmascotresized: I’ll cut the rest of the flashbacks. They’re word-for-word identical to the last update.

newmascotresized: The worst part of this? This scene might’ve fucking been effective if the writers had a fucking spine!

Marukevil: “Well, it’s time…”

BlackMask: “…”

Marukevil: “For the sake of Yoshizawa-san, and the rest of your friends… I ask you to give me your answer.”

Marukevil: “Huh?”

BlackMask: “Negotiations seem to have broken down.”

Marukevil: “…I see.”

Sumire: “You’re not serious, right? Please… I’m begging you, Akira-senpai… please let me live as Kasumi!”

Sumire: “But, why? The pain is too much… why can’t I just leave it behind me!? Kasumi is gone forever, and… and it’s all my - all Sumire’s fault! I can’t live that kind of life!”

Violet: “If you do, then I’ll…!”

BlackMask: “How stubborn… no matter what you say to her, I doubt she’ll understand. I don’t think we have a choice in the matter here. I could take care of it for you right now… but you’d prefer her to leave here alive, right?”

BlackMask: “Just hurry up and end this.”

newmascotresized: Akechi then fucks off to let us do this boss fight alone.

newmascotresized: Kasumire can only use physical skills and bless spells - and guess what Lucifer is immune to?

newmascotresized: I hit the rush button and let it handle the fight for me. Kasumire doesn’t repel or null Bless, and doesn’t have Megidolaon lined up if you null everything she can throw at you.

newmascotresized: At low health, Kasumire will start using Charge… which is a total non-threat if you null Physical.

BlackMask: “Looks like you lost.”

Violet: “…Why?”

Violet: “Akira-senpai… no… I can’t… I can’t go back to being Sumire… you saw it all for yourself, Akira -senpai. it’s my own fault that my sister’s…”

Violet: “Why don’t you understand!? Please, I beg you…”

Marukevil: “Yoshizawa-san…”

newmascotresized: Naturally, the animators had to put in a scene of a tentacle creeping up Kasumire’s thigh.

newmascotresized: This fight is scripted, because we didn’t get enough of that shit with Yaldabaoth.

newmascotresized: Berserk Cendrillon has the same gimmick Yaldabaoth did - on her turn, if her HP is low enough, she’ll drain one of the Byakhees to heal herself for 600 HP.

newmascotresized: Now, you might ask “What happens if you kill both Byakhees before she goes, say by using a high-level Nuclear spell?” and the answer is that Maruki goes immediately before Cendrillon does and summons more.

newmascotresized: The Byakhees will always attempt to use Heat Riser on Cendrillon if she isn’t already buffed. The best use of Akechi’s turns here is to use nothing but Debilitate.

newmascotresized: I thought I might be able to get a weakness hit using Cendrillon’s actual weakness (which is Curse) but nope, she’s just neutral to everything - including Bless.

newmascotresized: Anyway, the rest of this fight is watching Cendrillon heal until…

Marukevil: “You can’t tell? It’s her refusal to accept the truth…”

BlackMask: “Tch… we can’t afford to waste time on this shit!”

Fox: “Our apologies for making you wait so long.”

Noir: “Is that…?”

Panther: “Akechi-kun and Dr. Maruki!?”

MorganaCat: “What in the world is going on here!?”

newmascotresized: Oh, right. The game makes the mistake of returning Morgana to his stupid anime mascot portrait instead of the realistic cat one. Yeah no, fuck that.

Skull: “So much of this shit makes no sense, but we’ll cover it later! We’ve gotta stop her first - right, Joker?”

MorganaCat: “All right! Let’s get in formation!”

newmascotresized: The fight immediately starts again, with Joker and Akechi healed to full. Your first priority here is going to be to get rid of Akechi by any means necessary.

newmascotresized: That’s because Cendrillon can now use Bless spells. She can still Drain them for 600 HP, and will do that if she gets an extra turn from hitting Akechi.

newmascotresized: The rest of the fight is as simple as casting multi-target Nuclear spells to hit the Byakhees, and then Baton Passing to Yusuke or Makoto to shit out damage. We nearly hit 4 digits even against Cendrillon’s ridiculous magic defense.

newmascotresized: You also probably want to get rid of Ann, if only because the Byakhees null Fire.

newmascotresized: I get Cendrillon really low on HP… and then I accidentally nuke the Byakhees to death.

newmascotresized: This causes Maruki to summon more before Cendrillon’s turn, which she then uses to heal. Because both of the Byakhees are fresh, she gets the full 600 HP out of it.

newmascotresized: Fortunately, Ann gets a Showtime and it doesn’t matter.

Marukevil: “You’ve all… I can’t believe you’ve thrown away your happiness just to come here and… and how? It’s impossible…”

Marukevil: “That’s right. More importantly, why are-”

Skull: “Dude… what the hell’s Doc doin’ inside a Palace!?”

BlackMask: “He’s ruling this Palace, is what he’s doing.”

Skull: “…!”

BlackMask: “Not only that, he’s the one who generated this whole distorted reality - isn’t that right, Maruki-san?”

Marukevil: “…All of this was done for your own joy.”

Fox: “Our joy?”

Marukevil: “That’s right. I only wanted to grant your wishes… each and every one…”

Skull: “What, you what? Whaddya mean!? We never wished for anything like…”

Marukevil: “Is that really true?”

Skull: “Huh?”

Marukevil: “…No, never mind. So you all intend to deny the reality I’ve created for you… if you want to fight me… then so be it. If you plan on changing my heart, that’s fine too.”

Marukevil: “But before that - I think there’s still room for discussion here. Also, I believe taking care of Yoshizawa-san is more important than settling this issue right now.”

BlackMask: “Planning to run again?”

newmascotresized: Here’s a question: why isn’t Akechi fucking shooting him? You know, with the silenced pistol he carries at all times.

Marukevil: “We can get back to fighting, if that’s what you really want… but I think you’re rather exhausted at the moment.”

newmascotresized: We have at least four Somas. The game could launch us right into Maruki’s boss fight and I could easily win it, even with the HP and SP levels I had at the end of the Cendrillon fight.

BlackMask: “…”

Sumire: “Ngh…”

Marukevil: “…There’s still time. February 3rd. I’ll hear your final decision on the 3rd. If your views can’t align with mine by then, we’ll have no other choice but a physical altercation.”

newmascotresized: You know, for a character who’s supposed to be a villain people don’t hate, I fucking hate Maruki. His characterization is completely fucking inconsistent. Just look at this last bit of dialogue.

newmascotresized: First he goes “I believe there’s still room for discussion here”, which totally fits his character: he’s a therapist who knows he doesn’t stand a fucking chance in a fight against a bunch of teenagers who killed God.

newmascotresized: Then he immediately goes into “If your views don’t align with mine, then we’ll have no choice but to have a physical altercation”. What the fuck is this shit?

newmascotresized: I’ll tell you what they should’ve done. They should’ve not had the cutscene on 01/02, put this cutscene on 01/02, and then had this one be Maruki trying to sit the party down and reason with them.

Oracle: “…I’ve lost his reading.”

Queen: “I want to pursue him, but I doubt that’s even possible right now.”

Skull: “Let’s get outta here. Yoshizawa’s gotta rest, anyway.”

Yusuke: “The Navigator’s returned to our devices… a Palace is visible in our own reality…”

Ann: “Um, does this mean reality’s broken right now, or something? Something to do with Dr. Maruki, anyway?”

MorganaCat: “Hey, Akira - how much do you know about this stuff?”

Futaba: “So Dr. Maruki…”

Haru: “He altered our reality… to make our dreams come true?”

Yusuke: “This is all too much for me to handle at once.”

newmascotresized: Akechi: “What you’re referring to as Linux is in fact GNU/Linux or as I’ve recently taken to calling it, GNU plus Linux.

newmascotresized: Hashino is not incompetent unto himself, but is rather another dysfunctional component of a poorly functioning writing team made worse by his presence.

newmascotresized: Wait no, Hashino’s definitely incompetent.

Ryuji: “That’s right! Akechi-!”

Akechi: “There’s no reason to be defensive. Had I wished to kill you all, I would’ve done so already.”

newmascotresized: Sure you would’ve. If you had the gun with you, you’d have killed Maruki - or at least tried to and failed because you’re easily the worst party member.

Makoto: “So you’re not here to fight us?”

Akechi: “I’ve already put our feud behind me. Not only that… since he and I both refuse to accept reality as Maruki sees fit to make it, we currently have the same goal.”

newmascotresized: Dammit, Morgana! That’s not how it works! You’re supposed to do that when the dialog inadvertently references song lyrics! Fuck!

Akechi: “What about the rest of you? Considering how you were all living your ideal lives in that other reality until you decided to come here… while his heart is distorted, he is quite different from the adults whose hearts you’ve changed so far.”

Akechi: “Now that you know his intentions, I’m most interested in learning whether you still plan on fighting him or not.”

Yusuke: “What do you mean?”

Akechi: “I’m up against someone with the power to distort reality as we know it. The more allies on my side, the better. If we all share the same goal, shouldn’t we join forces and improve our odds?”

Sumire: “Nnh…”

Akechi: “I’ll be going now. Be sure to consider my point.”

Ryuji: “Hey… hey! Geez…”

MorganaCat: “Yoshizawa! Are you all right?”

Sumire: “I…”

Sumire: “Oh, yes…”

Ann: “No no, you don’t need to apologize!”

Makoto: “We should probably go our separate ways for now and discuss it at a better time.”

Ryuji:“Yeah. Tomorrow we can… oh yeah, third semester’s startin’ up tomorrow, right?”

Ann: “I guess we’re going back to school, huh? We still don’t have any idea what we want to do from here on out, though…”

MorganaCat: “We’ve got time. Maruki said he’ll wait until February 3rd before… let’s really think it over before making our decision.”

Sojiro: “Huh, I didn’t know you guys were out together… wait - what’s wrong, Futaba?”

Futaba: “…Hey Sojiro… is Mom…”

Sojiro: “Mom…? You mean Wakaba? Well… what about her?”

Futaba: “Uhh… nah! It’s nothing! It’s just, I happened to remember something about her, that’s all!”

Sojiro: “I see… okay then. Y’know, I caught myself thinking about her earlier too. Odd coincidence, huh?”

Sojiro: “Well, I’m gonna head home for the night. How about you, Futaba?”

Futaba: “Hmm… I’m gonna stick around a bit longer.”

Sojiro: “I see. Don’t stay out too late, all right? The place is all yours. You’ve got school tomorrow too, so get to bed at a reasonable time.”

Futaba: “O-Oh yeah! I forgot to tell you what happened before we came to rescue you! We all ended up here at the same time after you left for Odaiba…”

newmascotresized: Mercifully, this is a lot shorter than the whole bit after the casino. It’s still the writers for Royal shitting their pants in the same way Hashino did in the base game.

Ryuji: “Wait, you’re-”

MorganaCat: “What the -!? I’m…”

Futaba: “Oh yeah… that’s right! Why were you human, Mona!?”

Ann: “Yeah! You’re supposed to be a cat!”

MorganaCat: “I am NOT a - oh wait, yeah. I guess I am a cat.”

Yusuke: “How did we never realize…”

newmascotresized: I like to think Yusuke thought Morgana was a dog the entire time.

MorganaCat: “You know, we’ve got more important things to do than sit around here and figure out what happened to us.”

Makoto: “You said he was headed to Odaiba, correct? And with Akechi-kun?”

Haru: “We need to find them!”

newmascotresized: Why was any of this necessary to show? We saw the glass break, then they show up. There’s really no need for there to be anything in between unless it radically changes the understanding of the plot.

Futaba: “…You were fighting this whole time, weren’t you? While I was just bumming around town without a care… I’m sorry… deep down, I always suspected something strange was happening… something wrong.”

Futaba: “Ah, but I’ve totally snapped out of it thanks to you, Akira! I’m all good now!”

newmascotresized: I hate this fucking scene. I hate this fucking scene so fucking much. I hate the fucking writers for Royal. I hate whatever fucking dipshit put this in without realizing it should’ve been much longer and also far earlier in this godawful shitshow of cutscenes.

newmascotresized: The writers here were handed every fucking thing they would’ve needed to succeed. They had Aoi Yuuki, who EXCELS at fucking emotionally-charged scenes. They have a voice direction team that’s at least competent. It should not have been fucking hard to make a scene people would’ve remembered long after finishing this game.

newmascotresized: All they had to do was fucking do their job! That’s it! The scene would practically fucking write itself! Fuck! But no, instead we get fucking Kasumire and her dumb bullshit no one cares about, with every other character as a fucking afterthought.

newmascotresized: What pisses me off even more is that this is a game where the fucking writers had no problem adding 20 minutes to a cutscene, but couldn’t be fucking bothered to add maybe four or five minutes per character into the start of the expansion! Fuck! These dipshits are no different than the fucking Allansons!

Futaba: “School’s tomorrow, right? You better not stay up late… you might end up oversleeping…”

MorganaCat: “Look who you’re talking about! How could I be anything else? Sheesh… all this trouble with Yoshizawa and Maruki… we’ve got nothing but problems right now… for now, we should all meet up at the hideout. We gotta recap the situation and hold a strategy meeting.”

newmascotresized: No we fucking don’t! We don’t need a fucking recap! Fuck! Shut up! Shut the fuck up! Fuck!

MorganaCat: “Well, we’re going to need time to figure all this out. Either way, we can think about this tomorrow. For now… we should go to sleep.”

John Persona’s only wish is for better writers, and yet…

Summary

newmascotresized: Since I already recorded it, let’s see what happens if we choose to accept Maruki’s reality on 01/09. There is a MUCH, MUCH better version of this bad end that happens on 02/02.

Marukevil: “Oh, what a relief… you’ll accept this world!?”

BlackMask: “No… Akira, please tell me you’re not serious…”

newmascotresized: The game gives us one last opportunity to back out, which is something you do when you’re choosing between what’s supposed to be two equally valid ending choices.

Marukevil: “Really!? I’m just so happy that you’ve come to see things my way! You don’t need to worry about anything anymore. Just leave the rest to me.”

newmascotresized: There’s a musical sting here that makes it very clear that you have fuc-

timrodawwpresized: That you’ve picked the objectively correct answer! After all, accepting Maruki’s reality is a valid ending choice and there’s no reason for there to be an ominous musical cue at all!

timrodawwpresized: Oh, what’s this doing here? I thought this was where I put my recording for Eternal Punishment. That’s fine, we’ll just go with this.

Sojiro: “Huh? Is that some kinda joke? C’mon - wake up, Mister Party Planner… this whole get-together was your idea…”

Futaba: “Y’know, something hit me a while back - we’re the same age. You don’t have to be so polite to me.”

Kasumi: “But Futaba-senpai, I still think of you that way.”

Futaba: “Then as your senpai, I order you to speak casually to me! And no ‘-senpai’!”

Kasumi: “Got it! …Hi, Futaba.”

Haru: “Was that, ah… casual enough?”

Futaba: “…Confirmed for casual!”

Kasumi: “Thank you, Futaba-senpai! Oh, uh…”

Futaba: “It’s no biggie, just go with whatever’s easier for ya. Your senpai allows it!”

timrodawwpresized: Aren’t these lengthy gags about honorifics just the best?

Ryuji: “Attention, everybody: it’s ehomaki time! I’m gonna do my thing! Just gotta make a wish, and then eat this whole thing in one shot! So… which direction am I supposed to face for this to be good luck?”

timrodawwpresized: Ehomaki is a kind of sushi roll eaten on Setsubun, which traditionally uses seven ingredients to represent the seven lucky gods. The ingredient list is… pretty much anything, actually. The only rules are seven ingredients and also that you don’t cut the roll once it’s made.

timrodawwpresized: It’s kind of controversial because a lot of places make them… and that means a lot of it goes unsold and gets thrown out. Combined with the fact that ehomaki are rather large, it means a lot of food waste.

Akechi: “It says that’s north-northwest of here, and a bit to the right, so…”

timrodawwpresized: The traditional thing to do on Setsubun is to eat the ehomaki in the year’s lucky direction - 2021’s will be south-southeast and 2022’s will be north-northwest.

Ann: “How much is a ‘bit’, though?”

Ryuji: “Eh, I’ll figure it out. Don’t say a word to me until I’m done, got it? I gotta eat the whole thing without talkin’ for the wish to come true.”

Makoto: “Do we actually have to watch this?”

Yusuke: “I’d be hard-pressed to call this picturesque.”

Haru: “Do you really think eating an entire roll of sushi could grant your wish?”

Futaba: “I prefer throwing beans for luck. Drive them demons away! Sojiro, you be the demon this year.”

Sojiro: “And are you going to be the one who cleans up afterwards?”

Kasumi: “Come on, Ryuji-senpai! You can do it!”

Ryuji: “Thanks!”

Kasumi: “Oh!”

Ryuji: “Oh!”

Ann: “Good grief.”

MorganaHuman: “Well, that’s Ryuji for you.”

Ryuji: “Shorry…”

Kasumi: “Me too… but I really do appreciate all of my senpai cheering me on!”

MorganaHuman: “That’s right we’re cheering you on! We’ve got your back, no matter what. After all, this is where you belong!”

Ann: “Yeah! We’ll always be together. And that goes for all of you!”

Ryuji: “Fine, fine! I’ll just try again!”

Sojiro: “Still at it, huh?”

Kasumi: “So, ‘we’ll always be together,’ huh? I sure hope so.”

Sojiro: “Nice work putting that all together.”

Sojiro: “You can take it over for another party whenever you’d like. Hey… can I ask you something? So, um… I’ve been thinking for a while now… if it’s good with you…”

Sojiro: “And I’ll make sure to talk to your parents about it took, okay? But, at least until you’re done with high school and all… would you maybe like to keep staying at the cafe? And maybe, even after graduation, you could… whaddya say?”

Sojiro: “Really? Well, I’d better get the ball rolling tomorrow, then. Heh, things sure are cookin’ up around here.”

timrodawwpresized: I remember my high school graduation. It was a wonderful, magical time - I even got confessed to under the cherry tree… which admittedly was a little weird because I’m from the US.

timrodawwpresized: In fact, it was strange because the school had a courtyard with like, three dozen cherry trees in it and every single one had someone get confessed to underneath it that day.

Haru: “Mm, thanks.”

Ann: “Makoto’s last big speech as council president got me all teared up… sigh That was such a nice ceremony.”

Ryuji: “Hey, lemme see.”

Ryuji: “You gotta do that to be officially graduated!”

Futaba: “Aren’t you feeling even a bit sentimental?”

Makoto: “This year really flew by, didn’t it?”

Haru: “We made so many memories together… I might even remember those better than what we did in school.”

Ann: “Yeah. But it is gonna suck not seeing you two at school anymore.”

Futaba: “Don’t worry. I’ll be attending here starting in April.”

Ryuji: “For real?”

Futaba: “I’ll be bringing the lunches, so you better get psyched! Sojiro’s gonna teach me how to cook!”

Ryuji: “Oh, right - you’re gonna be here too.”

MorganaHuman: “Don’t forget about me, either. Maybe I should become a high-schooler as well.”

timrodawwpresized: Morgana can finally go to the same school as his boyfriend!

Ann: “Ooh, will you? That sounds like fun!”

Yusuke: “Perhaps I should also transfer to Shujin…”

Haru: “You came to the ceremony?”

Kasumi: "I wanted to tell you… in person… huff Congratulations on your graduation!’

Makoto: “Thank you.”

Haru: “I have an idea - why don’t we take a group picture?”

Ann: “Ooh, yeah!”

Makoto: “We haven’t seen you since the pep rally. I’ve been meaning to ask, what are your plans after high school, Akechi-kun?”

Akechi: “I’m thinking about going freelance. Considering how busy I’ve been up to now, I think I’ve earned at least a year or so of taking it easy.”

Futaba: “Don’t turn into a shut-in, got it?”

Akechi: “Thanks for the warning. Now, everyone gather up over there.”

timrodawwpresized: There’s another musical sting here, and I don’t know why. I mean, this is a great ending! No one died, everyone is happy…

timrodawwpresized: There’s some shots during the credits, and I missed one because there’s like five minutes of credits in between. I’ll post a screenshot I stole from a video of it.

timrodawwpresized: Wait… something’s not right about this one. Shouldn’t there be someone else there where Madarame is? I feel like Yusuke had a boyfriend, but…

timrodawwpresized: Huh. There’s something about this one that makes me feel… angry. I don’t know why that would be! I loved this game! I’m actually really sad to see it end - you feel like you’re there, you know?

timrodawwpresized: This is the final shot, after about five additional minutes of credits. It’s weird… Joker looks like he’s got this strange secret that he shares with Akechi.

timrodawwpresized: Anyway, let’s get started on Eternal Punishment again!

On the plus side, if it’s a world without pain than that one RPG with the four letter name doesn’t exist, so it’s impossible to say whether this is a good ending or a bad ending.

Click Here for Update 107

Lavenza: “You have been imprisoned once more… this time, not by the God of Control, but a different entity… one who’s bound you through your future.”

newmascotresized: Read: Atlus was too lazy to make a new design for the Velvet Room that might actually reflect Maruki’s reality.

Lavenza: “However, you held fast to your free will and believed in your bonds, allowing your friends to regain their own realities. You are on the verge of grasping a potential reality once more.”

Lavenza: “Our meeting again now, within this place, is proof enough. It seems the time has come.”

Lavenza: “We are merely beings who provide aid to humans as they carry out their will… you must be the one to determine the path and actions to take. If the will of rebellion still thrives within you, then we will surely meet again.”

MorganaCat: “We ought to tell everyone else that, too. Let’s all meet up after school.”

newmascotresized: Okay, so wait. The party knows that Igor and Lavenza exist. We know that they’re capable of pulling the other party members into the Velvet Room. Why the hell did they not just meet there?

newmascotresized: I mean, I’ll tell you why - it’s because that would require effort and probably rigging the Velvet Room up for the entire party, and we all know Atlus’s slogan when it comes to effort.

Sumire: “Good morning… um… I’m sorry. I can’t believe what I tried to do to you two… I genuinely cannot apologize enough for what happened…”

MorganaCat: “Aw c’mon, there’s no need for that. More importantly, how have you been?”

Sumire: “Physically, I’m fine… but, mentally? To be entirely honest, I’m all mixed up.”

Sumire: “My memories are still pretty fuzzy and I haven’t really processed everything yet… I’m going to need a little time to myself to think things through. I have to figure out what to do with myself from here on…”

Kawakami: “Next year’s going to be all about your college entrance exams, so you’d better start preparing now. Oh, and if you cause any trouble, that’ll show up on your transcripts. So make sure you behave yourselves, okay?”

Kawakami: “Now, time to turn in that homework. Let’s see, who’s on class duty today…”

newmascotresized: The writers had a prime opportunity here to show off how much reality has changed, and they fucking blew it. As far as I know, they do go into that a little bit as time goes on… but not nearly enough.

MorganaCat: “Have you been studying…? Well, not that you really had time for that.”

MorganaCat: “We definitely need to update everyone about Lady Lavenza… and cook up our plans for here on out, too.”

Yusuke: “Akechi had mentioned that we needed to determine what we’ll do from here on out - it seems he was right.”

Haru: “We can’t accept this reality, but… that means we’ll have to fight Dr. Maruki, right?”

MorganaCat: “That’s right. We have to confront Maruki and steal his desire… in a way, it’s business as usual for us.”

newmascotresized: And this is exactly the fucking problem! It shouldn’t be! They should have fucking taken this entire concept and run with it!

newmascotresized: Imagine if they had done something like Snow Queen, where the idea is that you have to rescue the party members and kill Maruki - but every day you take makes Maruki’s grip on reality stronger.

newmascotresized: There’d be a Thanatos First mode, which would be simply soloing him with Joker and killing him on January 4th. Otherwise, saving a party member takes a day. There would probably be a thing like the mirror shards you could use to save the adult confidants and Hifumi/Shinya.

Ann: “That desire’s just a wish for us all to be happy, right?”

MorganaCat: “I admit, it’s nothing similar to the desire we’ve seen in the likes of Shido and Kamoshida.”

Haru: “The Phantom Thieves only change the hearts of evildoers. Dr. Maruki is quite different from our past targets…”

Ryuji: “Well, I think we already know what we gotta do.”

newmascotresized: Do we know that Ryuji isn’t still in the world where dreams come true?

Ryuji: “There probably plenty of folks out there, livin’ all happy in this reality. Who knows? Maybe Dr. Maruki’s actually doin’ the right thing. But we all still feel like this reality’s wrong, right?”

newmascotresized: No, that’s not a typo on my part. That’s how the game does it. I think what they meant to type was “There’re prolly”.

Ryuji: “We decide what’s right for ourselves. That was what we all agreed on when we went after Akira in the Palace. If changin’ Doc’s heart fixes our reality, then I’m gonna do it.”

newmascotresized: Okay so why the fuck isn’t Maruki here? The writers had no fucking problem inserting him in every other cutscene in the base game, but couldn’t have him here?

Yusuke: “So, we’re going to change our target’s heart not to reform society, but to acquire the reality we believe in. That doesn’t sound bad at all.”

Ann: “Then it’s unanimous!”

MorganaCat: “Well, that means our next step is pretty clear.”

MorganaCat: “Right. Maruki said that he’d be willing to fight if we are, too. It’s safe to assume he’s expecting us to infiltrate his Palace.”

Ryuji: “That reminds me - you know that, uh… reality-bending stuff? Why’s Doc able to do that anyway?”

Futaba: “I’ve been wondering the same thing. Even if he was the top cognitive psience expert, that wouldn’t be enough for him to do all of this.”

MorganaCat: “If we’re going to fight Maruki, we’d better dig up some more intel on him first.”

Lavenza: “This is Lavenza speaking.”

newmascotresized: Metal Gear!?

Haru: “Huh?”

Lavenza: “Your will of rebellion has reached new heights. We would like to aid that will, if you find it agreeable.”

Ryuji: “Wait, how is she even calling you?”

newmascotresized: Joker: “Well, uh… I may have paid Caroline and Justine several million yen to fuse Lucifer.”

Futaba: “And how’d she know how high our wills are? Did she tap your line or something?”

Ryuji: “Her timing was just too perfect… maybe she actually did!”

Lavenza: “I’ve performed no form of electronic surveillance whatsoever.”

Yusuke: “…Apparently she can hear you.”

Lavenza: “There’s something I wish to tell you regarding your current situation… however, I’m reaching the limit of my communication ability with this method. Let us meet in person tomorrow.”

newmascotresized: Joker’s saying that not to do the Solid Snake thing, but because he’s surprised Lavenza didn’t buy a better phone plan with all that money.

Lavenza: “Yes. Of course, your friends are also invited. As for the location… let us convene at your school.”

MorganaCat: “At Shujin?”

Ann: “Wait, she’ll be at the school? Lavenza will?”

Lavenza: “In that case, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

MorganaCat: “She hung up…”

Ryuji: “Is she really gonna go to our school? Just, walk through the front gates like nuthin’?”

Haru: “I’m not sure what to make of it… but since we’ve determined our goal, and Lavenza’s offered to help us… I’d call that progress of some sort.”

MorganaCat: “All we have left is whatever we discuss tomorrow at school, plus whether or not we’re going to team up with Akechi.”

Makoto: “Considering what Akira told us, it really does seem like we share an end goal with Akechi, but…”

newmascotresized: And here’s how we know the writers for Royal did not fucking read the base game’s script.

Haru: “Mmhm, me too.”

MorganaCat: “Are you sure?”

Futaba: “Dr. Maruki’s strong enough to change reality itself. If we’re gonna fight him, we’re gonna need Akechi’s help.”

Haru: “Plus, if he does betray us again, we’ll just take him out too.”

Ryuji: “I guess that settles that.”

Makoto: “Let’s all meet at Shujin tomorrow. I’ll take care of figuring out how to get Yusuke and Futaba into the school.”

Yusuke: “I appreciate the effort, thank you.”

Ann: “All right, let’s head home for now.”

MorganaCat: “Why would Lady Lavenza want to meet up at the school? It’s not like she just wants to check out the place… right?”

newmascotresized: There’s no reason for it. No, really.

newmascotresized: I don’t think I explained how confidants work in the expansion, but we’re about to see how.

newmascotresized: As of today, any party member you reached Rank 10 with prior to The Last Day becomes eligible for a hidden 11th confidant rank. The exceptions are Sumire and Akechi.

newmascotresized: Akechi’s Rank 11 is unlocked based on how you answered the questions at the end of his Rank 7 and Rank 8 events. Remember how I said those were permafucks? That’s why.

MorganaCat: “…Hey. Sorry… it’s nothing.”

MorganaCat: “I was just… remembering what happened that night. You remember, right? The night before we went into Mementos to erase it… before we’d dealt with Shido…”

MorganaCat: “Remember how I said I’d finally found the place where I belong? Even though I said that - and really believed it - I still fell right into Maruki’s hands. I know I’ve made it obvious how much I want to be a human…”

MorganaCat: “More than once, I thought it would give me a chance with Lady Ann, but… what I did was just so lame. I can’t believe I was off having a blast while you were busy trying to help us.”

MorganaCat: “Quit being so nice to me! If you try excusing something this big, I’d be more disappointed than anything. Now that I think about it, you’ve been helping me from the very beginning.”

MorganaCat: “Hell, I was locked up in a prison when we first met. sigh I’m nowhere near cool…”

MorganaCat: “Quit buttering me up! You don’t have to tell me twice, though - I’m going to be super cool from here on out!”

MorganaCat: “Know what? I’m going to make you a promise right now. From here on, I’m going to be more independent! I just kept relying on your for everything because deep down… I thought you could figure everything out for me.”

newmascotresized: That “relying on your” is not my typo. That’s the game. The expansion content seems to have more typos than the entire base game did.

MorganaCat: “But that’s all changing! I’m going to stand proud on my own four feet… and I’m going to be the one to protect you. I promise I will!”

newmascotresized: These events are as low-effort as possible. There’s no special music, no text screen, no nothing.

New Persona: Diego

Origin: Novel by Johnston McCulley

Persona 5 Royal Original

Don Diego de la Vega is the real identity of Zorro.

newmascotresized: The third Personas for each character gain three new things over their second forms: first, they gain a new resistance (in Morgana’s case, it’s to Bless). They also get an upgraded trait (Morgana’s trait previously boosted healing, but now also has a chance to decrease the cost of healing spells) and a final super ability.

newmascotresized: Morgana’s super ability is Miracle Rush, which hits all enemies for physical damage and has a high crit chance. It’s not bad if you need extra press turns, but it’s not great as final abilities go.

MorganaCat: “Anyone who tries to pull one over on us like that is asking for it!”

MorganaCat: “Hrgh! I mean, it’s true, but… let’s just forget that part! Let’s reject Maruki’s world together and fight for our REAL reality! We’re gonna be even greater partners now!”

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, we can’t go right into confidants because there’s two more days of fucking cutscenes. The game gives you almost exactly enough time (plus a day or two) to get all the Rank 11 events and get Sumire to Rank 10.

newmascotresized: The screenshot pop-up is because we unlocked a trophy for “Evolving a party member’s Persona”… even though we already did that eight times.

newmascotresized: Why isn’t Inui off being a CEO and hunting poor people for sport?

Inui: “You all look sleepy. What, did you doze through the new year? Was Shogatsu one big excuse to laze around? Good grief… Shogatsu’s not supposed to be an excuse to relax, you know.”

Inui: “We decorate with kadomatsu, kagami mochi and shimenawa in order to welcome the Toshigami deities… it’s one of the oldest traditions in Japan.”

newmascotresized: There’s a lot to unpack here. Shogatsu is the Japanese New Year celebration, which runs from January 1st to January 3rd. It’s a big deal because it’s one of the few days everyone has off.

newmascotresized: Kadomatsu are decorations made from bamboo, with pine branches and plum branches thrown in.

newmascotresized: Kagami Mochi is kind of like a snowman made of mochi with an orange on top. They’re used as a decoration around the new year and get eaten a week or so later.

newmascotresized: Shimenawa are those rope decorations that get wrapped around trees and buildings.

Inui: “By the way, cherry blossom viewing and even Children’s Day are meant to commemorate deities and spirits. Japan’s got a lot of gods, so naturally there ended up being a lot of events and rituals to accommodate them all.”

Inui: “There’s a phrase referring to all the Shinto gods as a collective… anyone know it offhand? All right, Takamaki-san! I’ll bet you slept through Shogatsu…”

Ann: “Huh!? Oh, uh, yeah! I mean-”

MorganaCat: “Hey, Lady Ann is obviously panicking! Be a good guy and help her out!”

newmascotresized: I do not know why the game does this. Stats are kind of pointless, since if you have all the possible Rank 11s you have them maxed anyway.

Ann: “Akira, are you awake? Can you give me a hint? It’s some phrase about the gods… but it’s kind of abstract, right? What’s this phrase supposed to illustrate about the gods of Shinto?”

Ann: “Yeah, I think that’s right! They use a specific number, right? What’s that phrase again? The one about how many gods there are in Shinto…”

Ann: “Yeah, I think that’s it! So people call the gods of Shinto… the Eight Million Gods!”

Inui: “That’s correct. We call them yaoyorozu, or ‘the eight million gods’. Though that number’s not meant to be taken literally. ‘Yaoyorozu’ is essentially shorthand for myriad gods. An uncountable number.”

Inui: “In olden days, the Japanese believed that gods dwelled in everything. What with all these traditions, you could say these beliefs still affect our lives today… It’s a wonderful thing, really. We really need to cherish our history.”

newmascotresized: If Golden Kamuy is right, it’s not just a Shinto thing - the Ainu have a very similar belief system.

MorganaCat: “Nice! Lady Ann seems really relieved!”

MorganaCat: “As for myself, be sure to order some jelly-filled bread and- hm?”

MorganaCat: “That’s…”

MorganaCat: “Yeah, let’s go!”

newmascotresized: This is pretty much the same route we took in Joker’s dream, only backwards.

MorganaCat: “It even showed up in your dreams? That’s strange… well, never mind that. There’s no point in thinking about that right now. Let’s get inside the nurse’s office, quickly.”

Lavenza: “Hello. Thank you for coming.”

Lavenza: “…I see. Exchanging common expressions upon meeting like humans do… it has a rather pleasant feeling. But, that is irrelevant - let’s turn to the matter at hand.”

Lavenza: “As I told you yesterday, there’s something I wish to tell you. But first, please gather your friends here.”

MorganaCat: “Here? You wanna meet in the nurse’s office?”

Lavenza: “This place is filled with the cognition of ‘bedrest’. Maintaining my existence in a reality controlled by someone like Maruki is no simple feat… but the exhaustion that it induces is limited by this place’s cognition, so I may converse with you all in person here.”

MorganaCat: “I… see…”

Lavenza: “Until that time, I will provide my eyes with a much-needed rest…”

MorganaCat: “Wait, ‘rest’ - uh, Lady Lavenza?”

Makoto: “Considering how I don’t have an adequate excuse for the school to approve your being here… we’re lucky it went as well as it did.”

Haru: “Well, it’s just as we said before - we’ve accepted your offer to work together.”

Futaba: “Now’s not the time to let personal stuff get in the way of our goal… BUT if you ever betray us again, we’ll make sure you regret it.”

newmascotresized: I have no fucking idea how the writers for Royal got Futaba’s characterization this wrong. They work for the same company as the original (non-Hashino) writers and could probably contact them at any time.

Akechi: “…All right then. That’s no concern of mine, anyway. Remember what I told you all before? We share a mutual interest. Until Maruki is defeated, we have a deal to uphold.”

Lavenza: “Does this mean… you’re ready to begin?”

Ryuji: “Uh, ain’t that our line?”

Lavenza: “Yes, I wished to speak with you about the circumstances that led this Maruki to alter reality as you know it… as well as the true nature of his power.”

MorganaCat: “You know all of that?”

Lavenza: “I admit, there will be a degree of speculation involved - but, only to a small extent. First, I will explain the situation with the current reality. I believe that Maruki has altered the cognition of the masses…”

Lavenza: “In other words, it’s thought that the alterations he’s made are the result of his meddling with Mementos.”

Makoto: “He changed Mementos? How is that even possible?”

MorganaCat: “Wait - don’t forget about our experience with the Meta-Nav and Maruki’s Palace. It seems like this kind of thing has a habit of sticking around despite our expectations.”

Lavenza: “Mementos is the cognition of the masses given form. If that man is truly capable of controlling individuals’ cognitions… and that man were also to gain access to Mementos… it would be no surprise that he could impact everyone’s cognitions and affect reality itself.”

newmascotresized: I remind you again that “cognitions” is not a word. “Cognition” is its own plural.

Ann: “Ah… could he really have done all that? I mean, it’s assumed that Dr. Maruki has the power to control cognition, right?”

Lavenza: “Exactly. That man’s controlling of cognition - let’s see, why don’t we refer to his power as ‘actualization’? Most likely, that actualization is a power unique to a Persona. In other words, this man named Maruki is…”

MorganaCat: “That’s impossible… there’s no way to have a Persona and a Palace at the same time!”

Lavenza: “Determining when Maruki first awakened to his power is wholly impossible. However, by the time he crossed your paths… there’s no doubt that he was making use of his actualization - although, he may have only been doing so subconsciously.”

MorganaCat: “Even if it IS just his subconscious, he’s using a Persona in the real world…”

newmascotresized: Can he also shoot lasers from his eyes and travel through time? I mean, I wouldn’t be surprised at this rate.

newmascotresized: Just like Akechi with his “I can make things go crazy” powers that Hashino pulled out of his ass and then never mentioned again, Maruki is also an ass pull. Writers never learn anything.

Haru: “So, his ability to make Yoshizawa-san think she was Kasumi-chan…”

Lavenza: “It was most likely through the use of actualization.”

Akechi: “Still, though… even if we assume that Maruki has unique Persona abilities, such as the case with Akira and myself… we still need to determine how he used that power on Mementos as a whole, rather than just a single individual.”

MorganaCat: “Right. Even if there were some kind of power that could affect Mementos… it’s on a whole other level from what we’ve seen so far. A single person just shouldn’t be capable of all that.”

Ann: “That’s true. Changing reality just by thinking about it isn’t something humans do, it’s something that like, gods do.”

Lavenza: “And what if he became such a god?”

Ann: “Wha-?”

Makoto: gasp “The God of Control!”

newmascotresized: There’s something about the way she says this that reminds me of Grace in Gabriel Knight 3 with her dumbass jangly key man geometry management bullshit.

Lavenza: “Indeed - the being in Mementos that you all defeated was a false deity that the masses deludedly clung to… it is easy to conclude that Maruki simply took over the false god’s position when it disappeared.”

newmascotresized: Maruki simply reached into his ass and pulled out a new Mementos and then pasted it over the old one.

Ryuji: “Took over his position? Whaddya mean? So you’re sayin’ society thinks of Doc as a god now or somethin’?”

Akechi: “Now, the Phantom Thieves are the ones who gained the masses’ support after defeating this so-called God of Control… so it would follow that the masses would turn to the Phantom Thieves next as their savior.”

newmascotresized: Wait, how does he know about that? He admitted a few days ago he didn’t know about anything that happened after he died, and there’s no way the writers wouldn’t force us to watch Joker telling him.

Akechi: “In that case, why did they instead turn to Maruki, who did none of the work the Phantom Thieves did?”

Lavenza: “It’s most likely because…”

newmascotresized: Remember all those dumbass cutscenes the party members had with Maruki? This is why they exist.

newmascotresized: That’s what… some 40 minutes of cutscenes just to explain how Maruki knew what the party wanted? This is like that fucking scene from YIIK with the dial-up modem, only five times longer.

newmascotresized: There’s no reason for them to exist, either! You have a fucking setting with brain magic, why could you not have just said “Because Maruki is a brain wizard” and called it a fucking day?

newmascotresized: In fact, I’m going to coin a rule that probably already exists, which I’m going to call the “Hashino-Allanson Rule of Explanations”. The rule is this: if your plot allows you to plausibly explain something in fewer words, why the fuck aren’t you?

MorganaCat: “Wha-!?”

Makoto: “After we defeated the God of Control, we wished for reality to be like Dr. Maruki described it… and it happened?”

Ryuji: “Uh, I don’t remember doin’ any wishin’ with you guys and Doc! I mean, when would we have even had the chance to?”

Ann: “…! What about our counseling!?”

newmascotresized: There’s five screens worth of flashbacks I’m going to cut.

Akechi: “Looks like you all walked right into the spider’s parlor.”

Lavenza: “There’s no way of knowing how many of those situations were intentionally orchestrated by that man… however, the result is the same - a desire for his actualization was seeded within your hearts.”

Lavenza: “Thus, I have no doubt that it was your own desires that led to their actualization.”

Ryuji: “So this is all our fault, huh…”

Futaba: “We’re the ones who told him the cognitive world really exists, too…”

Futaba: “Right - let’s fight! If this is our own fault, we’ve gotta be the ones to fix it!”

Yusuke: “Yes. This realization changes none of what we must do.”

Lavenza: “Very well - then allow me to proceed. This world is in a very unstable condition currently. On the day that the God of Control fused Mementos with the real world… the merging was undone through your efforts, and the two worlds are now attempting to return to their fused states.”

Akechi: “So what you’re saying is,”

newmascotresized: That this is what it’s like when worlds collide? Eat shit, Akechi! Nobody steals my gimmick!

Akechi: “This world has reverted to a state where the fusion with Mementos hasn’t been totally undone. That explains why Maruki’s Palace was visible in Odaiba.”

Lavenza: “Even as we speak, Maruki is still influencing this world in places where its boundaries are blurred… as slow a pace as it may be, he still continues to actualize the world of the masses as a whole…”

Lavenza: “Should this continue, reality shall merge with Mementos once more. The two worlds will again become one… when that happens, anyone trapped within the actualized world can never again awaken to the original one.”

Ann: “No…”

Lavenza: “This issue goes beyond the masses as well. Although you are all Persona-users… it would be next to impossible to defy Maruki in a world completely under his control. To be clear - once the two worlds conclude their fusion, there will be no chance of your success in this mission.”

Lavenza: “And… I believe this fusion will conclude in one month’s time.”

Yusuke: “We only have a month!?”

Haru: “If memory serves me correctly, February 3rd was the date Dr. Maruki gave us, right? Could he have possibly chosen the time limit based on when his actualization will be completed?”

Makoto: “…It’s possible.”

Ryuji: “If that’s the case, we don’t got another choice except to steal his Treasure by then.”

MorganaCat: “We’ll need to secure our route to the Treasure by the 2nd so we can send our calling card… then, on the day of… we’re most likely going to have to fight Maruki.”

Yusuke: “Allow me to produce the calling card. This is certain to be our final card… I’ll pour my heart and soul into its creation.”

Akechi: “Be that as it may, there are still some unsolved questions.”

Akechi: “Right.”

Makoto: “What’s the deal with the Palace’s name? It doesn’t seem to affect the app’s functions, but…”

Lavenza: “That must also be a product of Maruki’s cognition. He most likely learned that you could somehow infiltrate the Metaverse. As long as he permits your existence, your method of infiltration will not entirely disappear, either…”

Lavenza: “However, in his heart, he must have feared you would learn his identity as the Palace’s ruler. Perhaps such a feeling took the form of hiding the Ruler’s name from you.”

Futaba: “But in that case, why didn’t Dr. Maruki just… actualize us out of existence entirely?”

Akechi: “Maruki told us that he wants us to accept his world. It may be hard to believe, but since we mutually benefit from his actualization, maybe he really does want us to submit.”

Ryuji: “…Sorry, even if it does fix shit for us, I just can’t accept the world gettin’ treated like that. Let’s start the infiltration tomorrow, yeah? And you? Sound good?”

Akechi: “You’re willing to ask me as well?”

Ryuji: “Duh, dude! The Phantom Thieves don’t act unless it’s a unanimous vote.”

newmascotresized: Akechi was never John Persona, though.

Akechi: sigh “Fine then. You know I have no intention of accepting Maruki’s world, anyway.”

Ryuji: “Then that settles that.”

Ann: “Wait - what about Yoshizawa-san?”

Makoto: “We may not have summoned her as one of the Phantom Thieves, but this definitely involves her as well.”

Haru: “Maybe we should fill her in on our situation once she comes to terms with her own. What she does with that information, though - that’s up to her.”

Futaba: “Right.”

Lavenza:“If that concludes matters, I shall continue to watch over you, Trickster. Please show me the path that you choose for humanity…”

Sojiro: “Hey, once you’re done washing that, you can go ahead and call it a -”

MorganaCat: “Yoshizawa?”

Sojiro: “…Have a seat. She’s here to see you, right? Don’t worry about finishing up - I’ll take care of it later.”

Sumire: “Would you mind if I… got something off my chest?”

Sumire: “Thank you. So, to tell the truth… I saw you all go into the nurse’s office today… and, um… I sort of eavesdropped on your conversation.”

newmascotresized: About how really, Sumire could not have been in this game at all and the plot would be basically the same?

Sumire: “You’ve all found the paths you want to take and are following them with such confidence… whereas I’m simply… like Dr. Maruki said before, I ran from the truth.”

Sumire: “I couldn’t handle the fact that Kasumi died because of my actions. My memories are still a bit hazy, but even when I remembered that I’m really Sumire, I didn’t want to accept it.”

Sumire: “I was still running from reality, where Kasumi is gone… where I had to live for Kasumi instead of as her.”

newmascotresized: The writers are already resorting to recaps and filler to make Royal seem like a worthwhile purchase, when it isn’t at all. This was maybe a $15 or $20 expansion DLC, not a $60 full-price re-release.

Sumire: “No… like I said earlier, I realized something when I saw you all striving to push onward… I can’t keep running like this. But now that Kasumi’s gone, I have no idea what to do with myself… Akira-senpai… what should I do?”

newmascotresized: God dammit. Yes, Sumire, we know what your fucking character motivation is.

Sumire: “…! You can be awfully firm sometimes, Akira-senpai. But you’re absolutely correct. I must thank you for allowing me to unload all of this onto you.”

Sumire: “I’m still not completely sure what I should do, but… I plan to think more on it. I’ve got to figure out what to do with my life now.”

MorganaCat: “One month to go, huh? We’d better come up with a plan. That time is gonna go by fast…”

newmascotresized: Next time, we’ll do Maruki’s dungeon in a single day - not because we want to, but because we’re forced to. It’s boring. We’ll also lose our 100% status.

“To be beautiful, a living creature, and every whole made up of parts, must not only present a certain order in its arrangement of parts, but also be of a certain definite magnitude. Beauty is a matter of size and order, and therefore impossible either (1) in a very minute creature … or (2) in a creature of vast size—one, say, 1,000 miles long—as in that case, instead of the object being seen all at once, the unity and wholeness of it is lost to the beholder.”
Poetics, Aristotle

Click Here for Update 108

MorganaCat: “Should we tell Yoshizawa? Well, we should probably leave her alone. Tell everyone to meet at the hideout. We should all talk this over before we infiltrate the Palace.”

newmascotresized: Today sucks, because we can’t get an alarm reading when we really want one. I think (but I can’t prove) that Maruki’s dungeon has a higher chance of spawning alarms to offset this.

Ryuji: “February 3rd is the date we agreed on with Dr. Maruki… we’ve gotta go find that Treasure already. Once that date passes, it’s over. We all get that, right?”

Akechi: “We’ll have to discover a route by February 2nd, to be precise.”

Ryuji: “That’s another way to look at it! And nice, you actually remembered?”

Akechi: “Of course I did. It wouldn’t be a terrible idea to secure our route sooner rather than later… we must be deliberate, however. We have no idea what’s going to happen.”

MorganaCat: “Yeah. Dr. Maruki’s pretty much got the power of a god. I doubt anything’s going to go smoothly. We’d better not let our guard down.”

Sumire: “You’re going to fight Dr. Maruki, yes? …Please, take me with you!”

MorganaCat: “Uh, but… you can’t go in dressed like that.”

newmascotresized: Persona 1? What’s that? Everyone knows Persona started with 3.

Sumire: “Please? I’m done running away.”

Violet: “I can’t keep relying on people, like Akira-senpai… I want to live life as Sumire!”

MorganaCat: “Heh, color me impressed.”

Skull: “Looks like she’ll do just fine here.”

Violet: “Thank you!”

MorganaCat: “In that case, we gotta come up with a code name for you!”

newmascotresized: …Why? Maruki already knows who everyone is.

Violet: “A what now?”

Skull: “It wouldn’t be right if you were the only one usin’ your real name, y’know?”

Violet: “Oh, you’re right!”

MorganaCat: “Joker, got any suggestions?”

newmascotresized: Yes, that makes total sense as a codename, in this dungeon where the person running it already knows who you are.

Violet: " ‘Violet’… yes, let’s go with that!"

Oracle: "Excellent! Now remember everyone, ‘Violet!’ Not ‘Violent’, ‘Violet!’ "

newmascotresized: I have no idea what she says in Japanese, but it’s definitely not that.

Violet: “Yes, thank you for clarifying!”

BlackMask: “Are we done? We should probably get moving.”

Skull: “I know, I know. Geez! C’mon, Violet - let’s roll!”

Violet: “Um, so what are we supposed to do now?”

MorganaCat: “First, we secure a route to the Treasure. We’ve gotta know where it is before we can steal it, after all. We’ve already checked most of the places on the map though…”

MorganaCat: “Looks like we’ll need to go even deeper into the Palace.”

Oracle: “Hold on, lemme take a look real quick.”

Oracle: “Except, I’m getting some weird Shadow readings, sooo… be careful. That’s over in front of the auditorium. Let’s get going.”

newmascotresized: Before we get going, let’s take a look at Sumire’s Persona so I can explain why I’m not using her.

newmascotresized: Cendrillon kinda sucks. She’s a Bless/Physical hybrid who has Bless Amp but doesn’t have a magic stat to back it up. Given that it’s too late to give her Charge or Concentrate, we have no reason to use her.

Noir: “Violet, are you holding up okay?”

Violet: “Yes! Sorry, it’s just… I feel just a little off…”

Violet: “I let my guard down for a second, but I swear I’m fine! So sorry for making you all worry.”

BlackMask: “That’s fine and all, but don’t hold us back either. If you push yourself harder than you’re capable of handling, you’ll endanger everyone on your side, too.”

Oracle: “Enemies approaching! They’re fast… I dunno what the heck they are, but we’d better move it.”

MorganaCat: “Should we get back to it? If things start looking bad, we’ll retreat right away. Until then, we’ll back you up with everything we’ve got!”

newmascotresized: Why is Maruki not here? All of the other awakening scenes have the villain in them.

newmascotresized: Man, the lighting in this scene does not do the models any favors. Haru’s hair looks like it’s made of plastic.

newmascotresized: Did ANYONE proofread this fucking script? Anyone at all?

newmascotresized: The lighting here makes Kasumi look like Maki. Seriously though, who decided this lighting was a good idea?

newmascotresized: The wiki claims that Cendrillon is actually Kasumi in the same way that Nanjo’s final Persona in Persona 1 was his dead butler, Yamaoka. I have no idea where the fuck they got this from.

newmascotresized: It wouldn’t make thematic sense for Cendrillon to be her sister because the whole fucking point of her character is that she’s trying NOT to be her sister.

Violet: “I’m done running away from myself!”

Skull: “Yeah, you tell 'em!”

Oracle: “Go, Violet! Give 'em hell!”

newmascotresized: These are Loa, which are weak to bless and psychic. The entire theme of this dungeon is “enemies that are weak to bless”… but given that you’ve likely been using Joker for Bless and Curse coverage the entire game, there’s not much of a reason to switch now.

MorganaCat: “You were as impressive as always out there. Well done, Violet!”

newmascotresized: As what, the one time you’ve actually seen her fight?

Violet: “Thank you. I still have a lot to learn, though. I promise I’ll do my best not to slow you down!”

Panther: “C’mon, you don’t have to be so formal with us.”

Violet: “Sorry. And the same goes for you too, Joker-senpai… I hope you’ll still be there for me.”

newmascotresized: And with this, we are no longer at 100%. It is once again possible for us to permafuck - though it’d be difficult since I think Kasumi’s confidant ranks require a lower point threshold.

Skull: “All right, let’s kick some ass!”

Violet: “Yes, let’s press onward!”

Oracle: “So the Shadows were behaving unusually because of that ambush… well, we may have been run through the wringer, but we have a mission here! Let’s check out that door.”

Violet: “Ah yes, you’re right… I’d completely forgotten.”

newmascotresized: Let’s go through that door now.

Oracle: “I took a look around, but it looks like it was built so it couldn’t be accessed anywhere else. You’ll need an ID for the door.”

Skull: “That lock means there’s gotta be somethin’ important in there, though! Let’s go get an ID!”

Violet: “But first, we need some sort of clue…”

Oracle: "Oh! Look!’

newmascotresized: Futaba, with the power to hear things nearby!

Skull: “Wassup, Oracle?”

Oracle: “I intercepted some communication between the Shadows… our ID hunt’s finally come to an end. That Shadow over there has one.”

Skull: “Looks like your snooping - I mean, your tech skills came in handy again. I didn’t even spot that Shadow.”

Oracle: “I don’t think he knows I heard him. Why don’t you ambush him for the ID? You can’t reach him from in here, though. You’ll have to go around the back and through the auditorium.”

Violet: “Understood. We need to take that hall up ahead. Let’s go!”

newmascotresized: You’ll notice a lot of side areas in this room. They are all COMPLETELY FUCKING POINTLESS.

newmascotresized: Roughly half of the enemies in this part of the dungeon are outright insta-killable.

newmascotresized: This area is a featureless hallway, but near the end you’ll hear the “grappling hook here, idiot!” sound effect.

newmascotresized: The rafters in this room are kind of a maze, but we get a glimpse of this dungeon’s red shadow right away. I would not recommend fighting them unless you use Morgana and feel like save-reloading.

newmascotresized: This is Fafnir. Fafnir is extremely annoying to fight: he repels Phys and Gun, absorbs Fire and Nuke, and resists Electric. He has no weaknesses.

newmascotresized: The ‘intended’ way to fight him using Akechi and Sumire… though really, Akechi and Sumire are going to be pretty useless because they’re both physical hybrids.

newmascotresized: Fafnir is also level 86, putting him well outside negotiation range. The party at this point is around level 81. Most guides recommend that if you’re going to attempt to negotiate, you save and then use Down Shots repeatedly until you can negotiate.

newmascotresized: We don’t see it this fight, but Fafnir also has Nuke Break - meaning he can bypass Makoto’s innate Nuke defense and Lucifer.

newmascotresized: Fafnir drops the Sooty Scale Armor, which has a chance of turning into Morgana’s best armor. I think you have to wash it yourself to have a shot at it.

newmascotresized: Shortly afterward, we get a fusion alarm… and then I notice something. Fafnir’s starting Magic stat is one point higher than Michael’s. He also has significantly better resistances.

newmascotresized: We get a cutscene that can be summarized by those two lines: we can now fuse any of the Personas native to Maruki’s palace. Are you thinking what I’m thinking?

Returning Persona: Fafnir

Origin: Norway

First Appearance: Megami Tensei II

Son of the dwarf king Hreidmar, and brother to Regin and Otr. Turned into a dragon after plotting with Regin to kill their father and steal a large amount of gold that had been given to him by Loki. Was later slain by Siegfried.

newmascotresized: Fafnir gives Joker access to Debilitate, which is one of the few ways left to boost Joker’s damage. As soon as I left the Velvet Room, I got another alarm, so…

New Persona: Hastur

Origin: Modern Fiction

First Appearance: Persona 2 Eternal Punishment

Hastur is a Cthonic god best known for his appearances in HP Lovecraft’s stories - but he did not originate there. He instead originated from a short story called “Haita the Shepherd” by Ambrose Bierce, who you may remember as the writer of The Devil’s Dictionary. Best known for killing anyone who says his name three times.

newmascotresized: Oh yeah. In Eternal Punishment, Hastur is a SUPER HIDDEN Persona that the game never tells you exists. Let me describe the process for getting him.

newmascotresized: You have to go to Double Slash in Aoba and talk to a random NPC who will ask you for your birth date, which you have to answer with either “HASTURCOMEFORTH” or “イアイアハスタア” (IA IA HASUTA) at which point the material card spawns on Maya’s desk at Kismet.

newmascotresized: Anyway, Hastur has a magic stat exactly one point higher than Baal’s and several points above Vishnu’s, while at the same time having better resistances than either.

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, I don’t have the space to hold enough Personas to fuse what we’d need to make the best guns for Akechi and Sumire. Making their melee weapons is kind of pointless - the ones they start with are maybe 20 or 30 attack lower than these.

newmascotresized: Lavenza also has her own animation for fusion accidents.

newmascotresized: Anyway, this entire area is a bunch of linear platforms with enemies we can kill with one button on them.

Oracle: “Wait, hold up! He’s communicating with another Shadow. I might be able to intercept some useful info.”

Oracle: “Wha-!? Sorry, Joker… that Shadow’s about to head out! Ambush him! Quick! Go, go, go!”

newmascotresized: We’ve got a fight against Dionysus and a Chimera. This is one of the possible random encounters in the next area.

newmascotresized: Dionysus has no weaknesses, but doesn’t have the raw tankiness needed to make him an annoyance.

newmascotresized: Once he’s down, the Chimera goes down in a single Panta Rhei from Hastur. We’ll see him in action later.

Violet: “We got the ID! Now, we just have to…”

Oracle: “It sure feels like we’re one step closer to the Treasure. Might as well try the ID out on that door now.”

Violet: “It opened! You did it, Oracle-senpai!”

Oracle: “Oracle-senpai… mweheheh, I like the sound of that! From here on out, we’re off the map. Keep your guard up, everyone!”

newmascotresized: If I was writing this, Futaba would whip out a katana and go “It looks like the kouhai… has become the senpai”.

Skull: “Ugh, we go through the hassle of gettin’ this ID and THIS is where we wind up?”

Queen: “Don’t be too disheartened just yet.”

BlackMask: “Considering the size of the room, there are most likely multiple exits. If we can make our way through here, I believe we’ll be much closer to the Palace’s central area.”

Skull: “Sooo, basically, we just gotta keep chargin’ on! Well, then let’s hurry and get the hell outta here!”

MorganaCat: “Being psyched is fine and all, but we don’t have the best visibility here. Stay on guard, all right?”

newmascotresized: This area is small, but very vertical.

newmascotresized: Here, we run into the Treasure Demon for Maruki’s palace: Orichalcum. While it’s used a lot in fantasy RPGs, it has a basis in reality - it’s a metal that comes up in ancient Greek writing.

newmascotresized: The demon’s appearance is based on actual “orichalcum” bars found in a shipwreck off the coast of Sicily in 2015. Those bars were primarily made of copper and zinc.

newmascotresized: We want an Orichalcum because of what it itemizes into: an accessory of the same name that boosts all stats by 6 (7 if you make it during an alarm) and gives the Evade Phys ability.

newmascotresized: At this point, we don’t really need Tae’s SP recovery accessory on Joker. His SP costs are rock bottom and Life Aid will recover all the SP he spends in regular battles.

newmascotresized: An extra 7 points brings Joker’s total Magic from gear to 22, which is enough to boost even his weakest Personas over 80.

Queen: “Is that the exit? Let’s wrap this up, Joker.”

newmascotresized: There’s a few Fafnir encounters lurking around in this area, which take advantage of the cramped hallways and relative lack of hiding places.

BlackMask: “That means this place must be important. Let’s take them out whenever we’re ready.”

Fox: “We will surely be walking into a fight - have you finished your preparations?”

Fox: “Very well. Let’s go!”

newmascotresized: For a mini-boss, this fight manages to be pretty annoying. While Cu Chulainn is weak to electric, Scathach has no weaknesses.

newmascotresized: In addition, Scathach has both Tetrakarn and Makarakarn in her moveset. Makarakarn isn’t that big of a deal because everyone nulls their own element, but Tetrakarn shuts down Yusuke.

newmascotresized: We get a Showtime fairly early into the fight, probably because Joker kept knocking down Cu Chulainn and Baton Passing. Now, here’s where the fight starts getting irritating.

newmascotresized: Scathach also has Elec Wall, which she’ll use on Cu Chulainn to null lightning if you weakness hit him a few times.

newmascotresized: To make things worse, Cu Chulainn casts Revolution and starts critting on every attack.

newmascotresized: Your best bet here is to have Joker hit Cu Chulainn with lightning, and then Baton Pass to Ann or Makoto and use the extra turn to Concentrate.

newmascotresized: Once Scathach is alone, she’ll start bringing out the ice spells. This is where you should probably switch Ann out.

newmascotresized: Scathach now has both Tetrakarn and Makarakarn on her.

newmascotresized: I also forget that for some stupid reason, Metatron doesn’t null Bless, so Joker eats some reflect damage.

newmascotresized: Ann gets a Burn off on Scathach, which Makoto follows up on for a free All-Out.

Skull: “So, where are we now?”

Noir: “This room seems very different from the rest of the Palace… it was more heavily guarded as well.”

Queen: “Could this be… some sort of surveillance room? The monitors are displaying various rooms within the Palace.”

newmascotresized: That last line doesn’t sound like dialogue - it sounds like a narration… and a pointless one at that.

Panther: “Wait… we were being watched this whole time?”

Oracle: “I dunno about that…”

Oracle: “All sorts of information’s being collected here from across the Palace and getting converted into raw data.”

Fox: “Data collection? But, what for?”

Skull: “Y’know, this room ain’t got any sorta way forward. Think we gotta find another path somewhere else?”

Fox: “Is that… Mementos?”

Oracle: “I’ve tracked the location all the data is being sent to! Looks like it’s going into Mementos. We might be able to make some headway if we investigate this location.”

newmascotresized: Seriously, what the fuck is this dialog?

Queen: “That reminds me, Lavenza did tell us… Dr. Maruki is utilizing Mementos to distort all of reality. Even still… are those really data cables?”

newmascotresized: I know this probably isn’t the case, but it feels like they wrote a lot of this dialog to be Joker’s thoughts rather than actual dialog, and then re-did this scene to have the party in it.

Oracle: “Agreed. Sticking around here isn’t going to help us any.”

Skull: “Alright, let’s get outta here for now. Let’s see if a Mementos trip does us any good!”

newmascotresized: This feels like more filler. What we’ve seen of Maruki’s palace so far is far smaller than even half of Shido’s or Okumura’s dungeons, and now we’re going into Mementos… which is procedurally generated.

MorganaCat: “We’ve got more firepower now, but our target this time is so much more powerful than any we’ve faced so far. We should probably get ourselves as ready as possible, like Yusuke said.”

newmascotresized: Wait, what’s Mishima doing here? Shouldn’t he be in a world where women find him attractive?

Mishima: “About the Phan-Site requests. If I find any this year, I’ll be sure to pass the info on to you!”

Mishima: “There aren’t as many posts now, but it looks like there are still plenty of people in trouble. We’re all counting on you, Phantom Thieves! Dispense justice!”

MorganaCat: “There are still people in trouble out there, huh? …That could mean there are still some targets left in Mementos. Whether there are or not, we’d better be prepared for anything - who knows what might happen.”

newmascotresized: You might ask why the fuck anyone would bother doing sidequests this late into the game, at a point when Mishima’s confidant is locked out. I haven’t recorded that far yet, but my suspicion is that these are for mid-bosses in the new area of Mementos that serves as the second half of Maruki’s palace.

Ann: “Hey, if it’s okay with you, then… can I see you after school? I’ll be in the usual spot. All right. Thanks.”

Mishima: “Uh… I can go on ahead…”

Ann: “Oh, sorry! We’re all good now! I’m gonna get going. See you later!”

newmascotresized: The game will suggest a Rank 11 event each day, but we are not bound by their suggestion. All of the base game party members (not counting Akechi) are available from today on.

MorganaCat: “Make sure we’re all stocked up on important supplies. We don’t want to run out of something when we need it most.”

newmascotresized: Yeah, let’s go see…

newmascotresized: Yusuke! Do you really think Joker wouldn’t go see his boyfriend first?

Yusuke: “We’ve already decided we’re going to oppose Dr. Maruki, so I know it’s far too late to say anything, but…”

Yusuke: “I just can’t keep averting my eyes from the truth…! I betrayed you, and all we stand for! How can I pretend I’m still worthy of our lofty ideals? Or your support!? I’m… I’m an utterly hopeless fool!”

Yusuke: “Please, I don’t deserve consoling…! You gave me my strength. You taught me to face the truth without fear… that strength - that anger is how I rose up against Madarame. I saw him for the fraud he was, and I freed myself from his lies…”

Yusuke: “And just look at what I’ve become. Dr. Maruki gave me a false security. He showed me a life spun from my deepest desires, and fool that I am, I welcomed it!”

Yusuke: “What indescribable humiliation…! How could I be such a detestable, narrow-minded sheep of a man!?”

Yusuke: “And you! You of all people deserve to shame me, but still you say nothing!? I betrayed you…! I have spat on the very principles of art! And more than that - I have spat on all you did to help me find my answers!”

Yusuke: “I’m nothing… not even worth the empty words I spoke… I can’t even bring myself to look you in the eye… forgive me, Akira…”

Yusuke: “Are our hearts truly so deluded? Are we foolish enough to cling to these misguided fantasies!? …You offer me mercy I do not deserve! There is no beauty in this!”

Yusuke: “I was a slave to my hubris all along. How did I ever believe the meaning of true beauty was within my grasp…? I was just a fool, lost in dreams!”

Yusuke: “I… see. Perhaps there is truth in that. …I can only apologize. You’ve saved me from repeating my mistakes once more. Compared to the grand legacy of my mother’s art… I am still but a chick toddling in her shadow as she soars.”

Yusuke: “I dreamed of flying at her side. Yet for all my leaps of faith, I only plummeted from my nest, again and again… what I needed… was a teacher. To grasp the beauty in my mother’s work… I needed a guiding hand, to offer criticism and validation as I earned it.”

newmascotresized: I was going to have Salty Vanilla do a Yusu-Gay for this, but then I realized this scene is pretty gay as-is.

Yusuke: “And our talks together have already led me to so many beautiful revelations.”

Yusuke: “My apologies - I got ahead of myself. But my point stands. I believe there is still a great deal I can learn from you. And if that’s true… then I’ve found my teacher. And with him, the path to truly grasping my mother’s art.”

newmascotresized: You are not ready to see what Yusuke’s final Persona is. Trust me, no matter how ready you think you are, you aren’t.

New Persona: Gorokichi

Origin: An Actual Person

Persona 5 Royal Original

Birth name of Ishikawa Goemon. Only mentioned in two historical sources, both made after his death - one a history of Toyotomi Hideyoshi detailing Goemon’s attempt on Hideyoshi’s life (which led to Goemon’s execution) and a second from Pedro de Morejon (who was apparently a Spanish missionary who traveled around Asia in the late 16th century).

newmascotresized: Gorokichi gains a resistance to Wind and an upgrade to his trait, which gives a greater chance of dodging physical attacks. His final skill, Hyakka Ryouran (a Japanese phrase meaning “Hundreds of Flowers Blooming Profusely”) is effectively Thermopylae without the restrictions. It costs a whopping 90 SP, but given that Yusuke only uses his SP to charge, is a great way to save Joker’s action economy.

Yusuke: “Akira… this reality of ideals and perfections - it’s not wholly wrong. Truly, there are parts of it I find almost painfully beautiful. However… you have helped me see clearly again. I believe I wish to return to our own reality.”

Yusuke: “It suits me far better to paint with both ugliness and beauty upon my palette.”

Yusuke: “Ha! Indeed. Let us return to our true home. To the reality where I discovered true beauty. …Ah, but first… you know what they say about fighting on an empty stomach.”

Yusuke: “That reminds me - I haven’t even offered you any tea yet. And you brought some kind of treat with you too, didn’t you? Is it sweet bean jelly? Or maybe a baked dessert, like dorayaki? Or perhaps you’ve brought…”

newmascotresized: How does Futaba know the kid is female?

newmascotresized: There’s a trade we can do tonight that I’m not going to bother showing because the reward is ass - you trade a bun from the Chinese bun stall in Kichijoji for an accessory that gives Resist Phys.

newmascotresized: Instead, we’re going to see the big reward for doing all of Caroline and Justine’s outings throughout the year. I’m not sure if the game will hint at this or not if you don’t know it’s there.

Lavenza: “…If I may be abrupt, could I ask a favor of you?”

Lavenza: “The truth is… I still have memories from when I was split in two… spending time with you and visiting all sorts of places together. So, I have been wondering… would you show me your current home?”

Lavenza: “I would like to see the room that has shaped you into the person you have become. I do understand my timing is not the most appropriate, given the current state of the world, but…”

Lavenza: “Are you certain? Thank you so much. Let us be off immediately.”

newmascotresized: Joker points to the sign reading “BOYFRIEND STORAGE” that’s always just off-camera.

Lavenza: “Oh! I would never have guessed. So you prefer cramped, dingy spaces? How fascinating… please, tell me more about yourself.”

Lavenza: “Your infiltration tools are made here? Could I possibly try my hand at it?”

Lavenza: “Thank you. Let us see what I can do.”

Lavenza: “Now, what should I make? Ah! I know - to show my gratitude for rescuing me, I shall craft for you a secret weapon. I think you’ll be rather pleased with it.”

newmascotresized: I feel like this is the devs going “We could have put in an actual reward here, but we won’t.” This scene IS the reward.

newmascotresized: The animations for this look really weird if you have the laptop on the desk - it looks like she’s doing something to it.

Lavenza: “Ouch! Cursed screwdriver - how dare you defy your wielder!? Obey me! Drive those screws! …Ugh! Oh, screw it! Megido-”

Lavenza: “While it pains me to say it, your secret weapon will have to wait. More importantly, I should be using this time to learn more about you.”

newmascotresized: They should’ve at least put in a joke melee weapon for Joker or something.

Lavenza: “It’s… surprisingly similar to the one in your cell. Can you truly rest here?”

newmascotresized: The cat comes with terrible allergies and a need to wash your sheets every three days to remove all the hair.

Lavenza: “So you can pet it as much as you like whenever you rest? I must say, I am a bit jealous… still, this space seems somewhat cramped for a fully grown human and a feline. May I sit?”

newmascotresized: It’s better that way, fewer places for him to get his hair.

Lavenza: “You fiend! You’ll pay for splitting me in two! Let’s see how your ‘holy’ grail holds up to this sledgehammer! Take that - huh? It didn’t work!?”

Lavenza: “W-Wait! You can’t… ahhh! No… I-I’m being split again!”

Lavenza: “Was I… talking?”

Lavenza: “Please, forget whatever you heard… I was just so comfortable… perhaps I allowed myself to relax a little too much.”

Lavenza: “Ah, you use it for training? May I ask for a demonstration?”

Lavenza: “Put your back into it! You think you can save the world like that? One, two, one two! One, two, one two! Don’t expect me to go easy on you! I’m doing this for your sake.”

Lavenza: “Or is it actually coming from the box attached to it? What is this?”

Lavenza: “I see! I’ve heard quite a bit about these remarkable devices. They say that once a player begins, they’re unable to tear themselves away. If it truly can entrance humans to such a degree… could you play a bit for me?”

Lavenza: “Look how they scatter! This is quite impressive… you weave around each bullet with dizzying precision. Wha-! There’s so many of them now… oh, you’re surrounded!”

Lavenza: “Look out! On your right! I mean, left! No, they’re in front now! Use the boost! Look, it’s the boss! Fire the beam cannons! Annihilate it!”

Lavenza: “You did it! The world is saved! …Ahem. A most dexterous display. I can certainly see why humans get so passionate about these games… perhaps I’ll ask my master if we can install one in our room.”

newmascotresized: I feel like this date isn’t as good as the Caroline and Justine ones were.

Lavenza: “Before I became whole, I visited many places with you and gained a wealth of new experiences. Thanks to that, I feel like I’ve come to understand humans better… and perhaps more importantly, I feel like I understand you better…”

Lavenza: “So, thank you. Though you have cast off your shackles, I will still await you in that room. This is a token of my gratitude for today. Please, take it.”

newmascotresized: Enduring Soul is a completely useless ability unless you’re doing a low-level run or something. It gives Joker the same ability to survive a hit with 1 HP that the party members have. It’s not worth the skill slot.

Click Here for Update 109

newmascotresized: Man, I feel like it’s been forever since we’ve done confidants. I haven’t had to open the guide in what, like ten updates? Maybe more?

newmascotresized: It fucking gets me that this is almost a dig at Maruki, but then isn’t - and I know it isn’t because if it was, the writers would’ve spelled it out more.

newmascotresized: If Japan is the most prosperous country, doesn’t that mean that other countries (who also want to be the most prosperous) aren’t as happy?

newmascotresized: I’d like to remind you that in the actual 2017, people were pulling their money out of Japan en masse due to the government instituting negative interest rates the year before.

MorganaCat: “…Everyone’s faces look so calm for some reason. But this happiness can’t…”

Ryuji: “There was somethin’ I wanted to talk to you about. If you’re free, I mean. Sweet, thanks! It was definitely worth waiting around… crap, is everyone else already at school!? We gotta book it, Akira!”

Kawakami: “You’ve all heard of ‘The Restaurant of Many Orders’ by Kenji Miyazawa, right?”

newmascotresized: Kenji Miyazawa was a Japanese writer and poet who primarily wrote children’s literature. Only two of his works were published during his lifetime, with Restaurant of Many Orders being one of them.

newmascotresized: Miyazawa only became well-known after his death: one of his better-known stories is Night on the Galactic Railroad, which was never finished. It was adapted into an anime film in 1985.

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, he does have a bit of a problematic association that really isn’t his fault - one of his poems (from Spring and Asura, the only other thing he published while alive) was used by the Japanese government in the 1940s as war propaganda.

newmascotresized: There’s an English version of Restaurant of Many Orders titled “Once and Forever: The Tales of Kenji Miyazawa” if you’re interested in reading it yourself.

Kawakami: “It was aimed at children, but even when you read it now, it really pulls you in. Speaking of, one of Kenji Miyazawa’s strengths is his sense of naming fictional lands in his stories.”

Kawakami: “Ihatov is the most famous among them. This place is loosely named after the author’s hometown. Okay, now… Kurusu-kun. Where do you think the fictional land of ‘Ihatov’ is modeled after?”

newmascotresized: Miyazawa spent most of his life in Iwate, and supposedly (according to Wikipedia at least, but it’s unsourced and therefore probably bullshit) got the name from the Esperanto pronunciation of Iwate.

newmascotresized: Wikipedia also claims he died the day after spending an hour talking to a group of farmers about fertilizer, but we all know what actually killed him: Esperanto. That and tuberculosis.

Kawakami: “Yup, that’s correct. ‘Ihatov’ is Kenji Miyazawa’s fantasy world… his utopia. A utopia is an ideal world, separate from our own world. Your own little paradise, huh? It’d be amazing if that actually existed.”

Kawakami: “All the booze and meat you want! …Oh, but then I’d be fat. And perpetually hung over. You know what, maybe things aren’t so bad as they are.”

MorganaCat: “Kawakami is pretty realistic…”

newmascotresized: Why is this a fucking IM conversation!? Show don’t tell, you fucking idiots! Fuck! You had one fucking job!

MorganaCat: “Throwing away your past to live in blissful ignorance… yeah, I could never live like that either.”

newmascotresized: You’ll notice pretty quickly that all of the Rank 11s are the fucking same, just with slightly different wording to make it seem like a different character. This shit is peak lazy.

Ryuji: “…Yeah, I had a feeling you’d get me. Well, there’s somethin’ I wanna talk about. Since we’re bros an’ all, I figured I’d just invite you over…”

Ryuji: “Geez, that fast!? You don’t even know what it’s about yet! Just listen, okay? I want this apology to mean something, dammit.”

Ryuji: “It’s like, you know how things have been for me? From the new year to a little while ago? How Dr. Maruki gave me a dream life, and I just kinda… went with it?”

Ryuji: “We basically spent last year together. And you supported me through a bunch of personal shit, too.”

newmascotresized: This reminds me a lot of that one Persona 5 OVA where the second episode is a recap. Did they really think no one was going to notice them recycling the same scene eight goddamn times, especially when you have nothing else to do but these scenes?

Ryuji: “I even told you I’d help whenever you needed it, and now, well… even I know I really let you down.”

Ryuji: “Nah, that was a little late. You’d already figured everything out. Knew from the start, right? I mean, sure, I could fight with the rest of the team like nothin’s wrong…”

Ryuji: “But I dunno. Feels like that’d be betraying all this stuff we built up together. Either way, I can’t just let this go. Gotta settle things somehow.”

Ryuji: “Not… gonna stop… till you say I can. Can’t… forgive myself… unless I do this! Can’t believe… how lame I was… shitty thing… to do…”

newmascotresized: He does around two and a half squats during this text, meaning he’s winded after four. No wonder I never use him.

Ryuji: “Huh? The hell’s… that… supposed to mean…? …Urgh- I can’t think and flex at the same time!”

Ryuji: “Should’ve figured this’d be pointless. I tried to think of somethin’ good, but even I know I’m dumb. So, I… I really wanted to keep going with the track team. Hoped I could keep it going, maybe get a scholarship, and be a star athlete for college. Make life easier for my mom.”

Ryuji: “And yeah, the doc’s big dream would’ve made that happen. But still… I dunno. When I think about it, I realize maybe it isn’t that hard a decision. I went through all that bad shit, got wrapped up in hating Kamoshida, turned into some delinquent…”

Ryuji: “…Almost got the both of us expelled, started hangin’ out with Ann and Mishima more… and even had my big conversation with Nakaoka and Takeishi, even if they beat the crap out of me. Heh…”

newmascotresized: A part of me wants to skip the rest of these scenes, because they’re all like this. They’re pointless fucking recaps that they shoved in to say they had more content.

Ryuji: “But that’s all part of my life. I still own that, y’know? It was a real shitshow sometimes, but I came out of everything stronger. I’m here 'cause I beat my problems. I can’t just pretend they never happened. Wouldn’t be right.”

Ryuji: “Yeah. And that’s why… I’ll stick with the reality I fought for. The one where we went through all of our shit together. That’s where I belong.”

newmascotresized: Oh god dammit.

Blatant Ripoff Persona: William

Origin: An Actual Person

Persona 5 Royal “Original”

First name of William Kidd, who is also Ryuji’s starter Persona.

newmascotresized: How original.

newmascotresized: Apart from being blatant design recycling, William… kinda sucks. A full-party Charge isn’t terrible, but at the same time unless you have a very specific party setup (most likely Ryuji, Yusuke and Akechi or Sumire) you’re probably not going to get a lot of mileage out of it.

newmascotresized: His trait is the only thing he’s really got going for him - it’s one of the only ways to boost physical damage short of using an item.

Ryuji: “Look, you have no idea. When I gotta take a bath knowing I’m not gonna get to sleep in the futon after, that kills me. Uh… sorry. Guess I just dragged you over here to listen to me whine.”

Ryuji: “Look, I know sometimes I’m a real pain in the ass, but… from now on, I’m gonna run with everything I’ve got. So all you gotta do is count on me, Akira!”

MorganaCat: " ‘Kill me,’ huh… talk about a morbid request. Let’s help him before he does something even more drastic!"

newmascotresized: I really should’ve done a typo counter for Royal. We’re up to at least seven or eight.

newmascotresized: Anyway, something weird happens tonight. I look on the map and notice that a couple of areas are open that shouldn’t be, because we’re already past the cut-off date.

newmascotresized: Using the power of Lucifer, we can somehow get that one event with Hifumi we missed earlier - that being the one in Jinbocho that I posted back on the day I missed it using borrowed footage. The text is nearly identical, so I won’t post it again.

newmascotresized: They must’ve changed the flags in Royal to allow for this, and I’m fine with that.

Futaba: “Just… something’s been on my mind. For a while now, actually. …Can we talk sometime? Whenever’s good for you. Thanks… see ya later.”

newmascotresized: There’s a new prize in the arcade we can win, so I grab it.

newmascotresized: I also put up the King Piece decoration. Joker’s shelf is almost full.

Futaba: “You got some time right now? There’s something I wanna talk to you about. It’s really important…”

Futaba: “Thanks… then come to my ro- actually, hold on… can you come a bit later, Akira? I’ll leave my door open, so just come in.”

Futaba: “Um… there’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about… so…”

Futaba: “I made a promise to help you whenever you were in trouble. For your sake, and for mine. But now, I…”

Futaba: “Yeah, I’m gonna help us fight back… I’m part of the Phantom Thieves, right? I feel the same way as everyone else. I mean… yeah, I don’t want to accept this reality…”

Futaba: “That’s all still true, but… I know this isn’t real. I figured that out a while ago. But I thought… if I got to see my mom again, then it was okay…”

Futaba: “…I’m so selfish! I was just thinking about what I wanted! You’re mad, I know, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…”

Futaba: “…Don’t lie to me. You’re mad at me. You have to be. Why wouldn’t you be!? I betrayed you! Don’t you get that!?”

newmascotresized: Joker taps the maxed-out social stats page.

Futaba: “…Sorry… I guess I’m still a little freaked out. This isn’t even what I wanted to talk about… there’s something else I wanted you to hear, anyway. Can I… um, is it cool if I say it?”

Futaba: “So like… Dr. Maruki’s reality isn’t totally one hundred percent illusion, right?”

newmascotresized: Fuck! Where was this conversation two weeks ago, when it might have had some fucking impact!?

Futaba: “Me too. But I guess I won’t get to stay with her. I know… I mean, I know now that this is all in my head. But I wanted to talk with her more. Go on shopping trips and stuf. I dunno, just… I wish I had more time with her.”

newmascotresized: This might seem like it makes no sense, given that Akechi told us that Wakaba and Okumura were both alive (and not Shadows, bullshit ass-pull clones, illusions, or anything else).

newmascotresized: It also doesn’t make a lot of sense that Akechi is still around when Okumura and Wakaba have mysteriously disappeared after the party broke free of Maruki’s control. Allow me to explain that, because the writers won’t.

newmascotresized: In the first draft of Royal’s script, the writers completely capitulated to the focus groups and put in a scene retconning Akechi’s death outside of Maruki’s reality.

newmascotresized: The original explanation for why Akechi is still around is that he was never actually dead - he was merely in rehab somewhere recovering from multiple gunshot wounds and also being exploded.

newmascotresized: While I have to give the writers credit for not being totally spineless, fuck them for ever thinking that’d be acceptable. By the way, the comments section for that video is what a world without reading comprehension would look like.

newmascotresized: By the way, I had a job interview yesterday. Halfway through, I realized I didn’t want it - they don’t offer health insurance and the pay sucks. Then they ask me “What do you do for fun, outside of work?”

newmascotresized: I look this lady in the eye and go “I do commentated playthroughs of video games. But not fun ones. They’re all games I absolutely hate.”

newmascotresized: She looks at me with an eyebrow raised and goes: “…and that’s what you do for fun?”

newmascotresized: Me: “Yes.”

Futaba: “B-But still, like… we can’t just live totally dependent on Dr. Maruki’s reality! Right? Even if I won’t get to see my mom anymore… if I can manage to keep working hard and moving forward, like I was doing in our reality… then I… I think she’d be proud of me.”

Futaba: “Y-Yeah! Um… thanks. …So that’s what I’m gonna do. If Mom could see that I was working hard, being a part of the group… I think she’d be really happy for me.”

Futaba: “I’ve been thinking really hard lately. Wondering how I’d want Mom to see me. And I think I figured it out. I want to be someone who keeps looking ahead - someone who never stops moving.”

Futaba: “This time, I’ll do what I can to protect you. And everyone else too. So let’s go take back our own reality. The reality where we can beat anything the world throws at us, as long as we have each other. The reality my mom gave me.”

New Persona: Al-Azif

Origin: HP Lovecraft

Persona 5 Royal Original

Arabic name of the Necronomicon in HP Lovecraft’s stories.

newmascotresized: Unlike everyone else, Futaba only gets a trait upgrade and a new ability. Her trait is her finisher screen - any time we get that (which is pretty often) we now get a full heal in addition to it insta-killing enemies.

newmascotresized: Ultimate Support actually does more than what you’d think. It does three things at once: casts a full-party Samarecarm (thus reviving anyone who is down), then Mediarahan (restoring everyone to full HP) followed by a full-party Heat Riser.

Futaba: “Master Futaba has reached full recovery! Get ready for perfect navigation, no matter what we’re up against!”

Futaba: “What can I say? I’m my mom’s daughter! I’ll be pestering you a lot more from now on, so… sorry in advance, and thanks!”

newmascotresized: Tonight, we’re going to make a very important decision.

newmascotresized: First, I lock up Mada and feed him a couple of Magic incenses. Mada has a low Magic stat compared to Joker’s other Personas, and I wanted to buff that a bit.

newmascotresized: He’ll sit there for a few days, and then we’ll replace him with Yoshitsune for maximum damage.

newmascotresized: Anyway, a very important decision. The jazz club offers Ali Dance tonight, but we can only teach it to one person. This is good on pretty much anyone who isn’t Haru: Haru needs so many skills to be good that we can’t really give up a slot for Ali Dance.

newmascotresized: I boiled it down to Ann and Yusuke, who both have extremely common weaknesses, and then went with Ann. Yusuke has a slightly higher natural evasion, and Ann has the lowest HP of anyone, so she’s a good pick.

Ann: “Your room’s pretty neat too, but this isn’t bad either!”

newmascotresized: Very mature, she says as she drinks out of something that looks like it’s about 300% sugar.

Ann: “When I practice my walk for my modeling job, I sometimes feel like I’ll forget how to walk normally after… adults might look stylish walking that way, but if a high schooler does it, I think it just looks like they’re trying to show off.”

newmascotresized: Joker panics. The whole point of agreeing to the date with Morgana was that no one was going to remember anyway. Does this mean Yusuke knows?

newmascotresized: In hindsight, I don’t know why I kept Dekaja. We’ve only seen what, one boss that ever used buffs? Maruki can buff himself, but at that point it’d probably be better to use that turn doing damage.

newmascotresized: Today, we’re going to do Ann’s Rank 11. Normally, this would be when we’d be doing Yusuke’s, but we have to put our boyfriend first.

newmascotresized: Ann’s bedroom is a war crime. Seriously, TWO shoe towers?

Ann: “Oh, I didn’t call you here for anything big or official… sorry. Actually, I wanted to give you a proper apology for everything. You know. Cause I got caught up in the life Dr. Maruki made for me.”

Ann: “I guess, but… even if you’re okay with it, it’s really been bothering me. …Honestly, I’m still trying to figure out what the right choice is. I mean, I’m not saying Dr. Maruki’s reality is better or anything…”

Ann: “But I can’t stop thinking about Shiho. Or how great her life could’ve been if things were like this.”

Ann: “No. Not at all. I know this isn’t actually reality. I would’ve been happy, sure, but… it wouldn’t have been real. Shiho was still moving forward. Even after everything she’d been through, she didn’t lose hope.”

Ann: “My strength came from her. That’s why, when Kamoshida said he’d kill himself, I told him he couldn’t run from it all. She didn’t run away, so he can’t either. And if I took the easy way out now… I’d be letting Shiho down.”

newmascotresized: Wait, what the fuck are you talking about? Shiho attempted suicide!

Ann: “You’re so kind, Akira. …Kinda familiar, huh? Back when I finally broke down under the Kamoshida stuff, you listened to me like this too. You didn’t know me at all, but you still listened to everything.”

Ann: “I couldn’t figure you out. Like, I kept thinking, “What is this guy’s deal?” Not only that, but you helped me with Shiho and my modeling… you’re too nice for your own good.”

Ann: “Eheh, I get it. Can’t stand a sad face on a pretty girl, huh? Anyway, I really am grateful. But that just makes me feel even worse about accepting this reality. I’m never going to lose my way again.”

newmascotresized: No, that’s Matoi Ryuko. Kill la Kill was so fucking good, unlike this nonsense.

Ann: “From now on, I’m going to face reality. For me, for Shiho… and for you.”

newmascotresized: My favorite thing about this cutscene is that if you look, Ann sits on her bed the entire time, staring at Joker and not blinking. The models in SMT V are somehow better than this, even if it has massive framerate issues.

New Persona: Celestine

Origin: A Real Person

Persona 5 Royal Original

Unlike the other third Personas (who are usually the first/proper name for the first Persona), Ann’s third Persona is named after Celestine Galle-Marie, a French actress most famous for playing Carmen. Looks kind of like a clown from far away.

newmascotresized: There’s one interesting thing about Celestine’s design that you never really see in-game. The back of her jacket has a design reading “Libre elle est nee, el libre lle mourra”. It’s a line from a song in the final scene of Carmen, shortly before Carmen dies. It translates to “Free she was born, free she will die.”

newmascotresized: Celestine gains resistance to Electric and has her trait’s SP cost reduction boosted from 25% to 50%. I only took High Energy because it’s marginally more useful than Dekaja at this point. The SP cost on it is WAY too high for what it does.

Ann: “Okay, I’m ready to move on! Thank you for everything! I promise, I’m gonna do even better from here on out!”

newmascotresized: There’s another unique non-rankup scene with Hifumi we can do, so why not?

Hifumi: “Change how you look at things, and the game will change as well. The world is like a shogi board. The pieces that live in the world can completely change, depending on the emotions of the player…”

newmascotresized: Oh, I thought she was going to go “The world is like a shogi board - flat.”

Hifumi: “I’ve been so twisted by the adults around me that I began to lose sight of myself. But after I met you and we started playing shogi together… my heart began to change.”

Hifumi: “Similar to this Ferris wheel… you showed me a different view, and changed my world…”

Hifumi: “That’s fine. All it takes is a single moment to overcome a repetition of moves… and an expert hand can break through any situation. That is what you are.”

Hifumi: “From behind, all scenery looks bright and vibrant. I truly love you from the depths of my heart.”

newmascotresized: …Why couldn’t she have been a party member? Why couldn’t they have made it so Makoto was working with Akechi the entire time? Oh wait, because that would’ve been good writing.

newmascotresized: I’m not shitting you when I say the rest of this game after today is going to be nothing but Sumire. We have to do six ranks of bullshit to get her to 11.

Makoto: “I’m glad I found you. I wanted to speak with you.”

Makoto: “I just want to talk, that’s all. If you have the time… is that okay? Thank you. Then let’s keep moving for now.”

newmascotresized: Why the fuck did they do this when they could’ve just shown it? This is fucking Allanson writing.

MorganaCat: “That Ushimaru, huh? It’s hard to believe. Guess we’ll just have to check it out when we’re in his class.”

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, we have to do Makoto’s Rank 11 today.

Makoto: “There’s something I just had to tell you.”

Makoto: “Honestly, I wanted to apologize. I couldn’t back you up when you needed me the most…”

newmascotresized: When have we ever needed Makoto?

Makoto: “I’m talking about Dr. Maruki. Ever since the new year, I’ve been stuck in his fake reality. You remember that time before I joined the Phantom Thieves, when I called you to the student council room?”

Makoto: “I challenged you on your ideals, threatened to expose you all… as if I knew anything about what was going on. …But since then, I’ve learned so much from the Phantom Thieves. From you.”

Makoto: “You’ve saved me, more times than I can possibly count. …After all that… I’d promised myself that if you were ever in trouble, I would leap in to save you.”

Makoto: “But… I forgot that vow. I just threw it away so I could cling to Father and Sis. It’s awful. To know that all along, I was so weak and self-centered…”

newmascotresized: It totally is her fault.

Makoto: “Even if it isn’t… does that really make it okay? Considering all the ways I made your struggle harder, even unknowingly, I can’t just let that go.”

Makoto: “You know… I think I’m more lonely than I was willing to admit. Father never spent much time at home. When he was there, he always had his mind on some case.”

Makoto: “And Sis put all her time into work. For both our sakes. I respected them both so much. And I still do, of course… but I can’t just let them take care of me forever.”

Makoto: “You know what I mean? I think it’s the right lesson to take. In any case, I’ve made my decision. I’m done just sitting quietly and doing as I’m told. If I’m weak, or self-centered, or lonely… or too dependent on my family… then that’s my problem to fix.”

Makoto: “But my pain’s still a part of me. All the struggles, your support - it’s what helped me stand up for myself. I can’t lose that. I’m not exactly abandoning the person I was. But I figure trying to bottle it up will only make my life harder.”

Makoto: "I want to be able to look at the most awful, disgraceful parts of myself, and still be able to say ‘So what?’ "

newmascotresized: That’s my response to all of these Rank 11 scenes. “So what?”

Makoto: "Huh? I’m not sure… at the very least, I know I probably shouldn’t be proud of them. That’s why I wanted to apologize. I guess I’m not completely ready to stand on my own just yet. But… I’ll keep trying, and I won’t run away.

newmascotresized: Makoto prepares to ascend to THE SMART DIMENSION where she can finally go to an anime filled with proper nouns.

New Persona: Agnes

Origin: Medieval Christian Fanfiction

Persona 5 Royal Original

Agnes is another name for Pope Joan/Johanna. She didn’t exist any more as Agnes than she did under any other name.

newmascotresized: Agnes gains a resistance to Curse and a significant buff to status effects. You need Ann and Yusuke to make full use of it, but it’s free Technicals any time it procs.

newmascotresized: Checkmate is a terrible skill. It’s meant specifically for Maruki’s fight and maybe Okumura’s if you do New Game Plus. I think Makoto can cast it three times on a full SP bar. It’s not worth it.

Makoto: “It’s strange. All it took to make my heart stronger was to put myself first?”

Makoto: “Sorry, but it looks like I’ll still have to rely on you a while longer. So I hope you’ll be prepared.”

newmascotresized: We don’t have anything interesting to do tonight, so I put up the Buchimaru-kun doll and called it an update.

newmascotresized: Next time, we’ll do Haru’s Rank 11. We’ll also do a couple ranks of Sumire, but there’s a free day and I might use it to try and fight the Reaper. We’ll see.

Aristotle did not, in fact, see a world where weirdos would latch on to both of those things.

Damn, imagine if one of the party members had been in that situation. You’d have to like, think about whether Yusuke would eve be truly happy without art, or if Haru would be happy if her dad wasn’t evil but she didn’t have her coffeehouse dreams instead of just having Joker walk up to people and go “Are you suuuuuuuure?”

I wouldn’t have guessed Yusuke’s ultimate Persona would by Ruby Rhod but alright. I guess he’s gotta be hot, HOT, HOT!!!

But maybe…in Maruki’s reality…POPE JOAN WAS REAL??? and was named agnes

I’ve been playing Scarlet Nexus (I won’t say “don’t play Scarlet Nexus”, but I will say don’t pay more than like $15 for it) and it has a similar plot of “maybe warping reality is bad because then things would be different and being different is kanashii”, only the reality-warping in question is time travel instead of Congitive Psience™.

After thinking about it and becoming increasingly moody and pessimistic, I think SNX (this is apparently the official abbreviation) and P5R use this plot for the same reason: it’s completely safe. There’s no way to read any statement or commentary or claim or opinion into or out of it.

You know, maybe I should refund it. I haven’t actually played it yet, I’ve been too busy mapping for SS14.

Whoa there, pal, those’re some dangerous thoughts you’re havin’! Those things might take effort and money, and we’re on a shoestring budget selling this full-price expansion. I don’t know that you’re a good fit for this company. Maybe you should try working for Square-Enix, I hear they’re hirin’.

Click Here for Update 110

newmascotresized: We’ve got Haru’s Rank 11 scene today, and then it’s nothing but Sumire and Mementos.

Inui: “Because of that, I tried getting into the stock market… not a thing you want to jump into with no experience. I lost five months of my allowance in one fell swoop…”

newmascotresized: That’s uh… not really how the stock market works. Unless he was gambling on options or buying dumbass meme stocks.

Inui: “It wasn’t a huge loss, so it’s not that bad, but… it’s quite a thing to stare your failure portfolio in the face. My portfolio looked awful. I used that word because my portfolio looked absolutely terrible, but…”

Inui: " ‘Awful’ originally meant something else. …So, Kurusu-kun, a question. What did the world ‘awful’ originally mean?"

Inui: “That is correct. Yes, it was only comparatively recently that ‘awful’ took on a negative implication. It once stood for awe of any kind. This is why older English documents use phrases like ‘awful majesty’ and ‘awful power’.”

Inui: “It could still be used to imply a certain kind of dread - that was just one of several possible uses back then. But as times changed, and language evolved as the centuries went by… we ended up with more specific words: ‘awful’ for the bad, and ‘awesome’ for the good.”

Inui: “…Oh, it’s time already? Let me say one last thing. After this winter, you’ll all be studying for exams. You can use your time wisely, or slack off. Either way, I guess your test scores are going to be awful!”

MorganaCat: “Well, one thing’s for sure: you’re definitely an impressive guy. ‘Awe-inspiring’ might be a little much, but… I know I can count on you.”

newmascotresized: Anyway, let’s go see Haru. I also harvest the tomatoes we planted uh… three weeks ago? It was before Yaldabaoth. I also plant some potatoes, which double physical damage.

newmascotresized: Haru’s bedroom looks like it was made of rejected Animal Crossing items.

Haru: “Yes, well… I needed to speak with you about this situation… or rather, because of it. I feel I owe you an apology, Akira-kun. I’m sorry… I was just so useless…”

newmascotresized: Joker: “So you’re going to grow some bangs and maybe get another 10 points in your magic stat? You’re finally going to make yourself worth using over Makoto?”

Haru: “I’m so ashamed… Dr. Maruki created me a saccharine, perfect new reality - and I accepted it without a second’s pause. It was only because of you that I was able to find my own path.”

Haru: “You were the one who gave me a future… and what did I do with it…? …I’m so pathetic.”

newmascotresized: Joker: “Look, I understand. Bangs take time, and you’ve only been in the party since October. Maybe you can get some extensions or something.”

Haru: “…You’re so kind, Akira. But I’m afraid that doesn’t feel like enough, this time. I want to stand at your side through this, and I want to do it with pride.”

Haru: “I wanted us to rebuild the company together. No, more than that - I wanted to save my father. But that’s just not possible. No matter how important he was to me, he’s gone now, and I cannot bring him back.”

Haru: “Surely, if… if I could just rewrite the past for my own benefit, it would be terribly selfish.”

newmascotresized: You know what just occurred to me as I was writing this? There’s no second version of any of the Rank 11 scenes for dating versus not dating. Then I realized that it’s kind of a blessing that there aren’t, because the last thing this game needs is more writing.

Haru: “I… don’t know. But what of the newfound purpose I gained after my father’s death? What of all the support you gave me? Even if I could simply choose to be happy, it wouldn’t be worth denying everything that brought me here.”

Haru: “So I need you to understand that I’m determined to see this through. I won’t run away anymore. I refuse Dr. Maruki’s ‘gift’ to us. I’ll choose our own reality. The one I defined through my own hardship, mistakes, and tears.”

newmascotresized: I should’ve gotten someone to do a drawing of Haru going Super Saiyan and growing bangs for this scene.

New Persona: Lucy

Origin: An Actual Person

Persona 5 Royal Original

Rather than being the first name of Haru’s first Persona, her final Persona is named after Lucy Hay, Countess of Carlisle. Lucy Hay is mostly notable for having played both sides of England’s Second Civil War - first on the side of the Parliamentarians, and then on the side of the Royalists. She was supposedly the inspiration for Milady de Winter in The Three Musketeers. Incidentally, if you look at the portraits of Lucy Hay on the Wikipedia page, she also lacks bangs.

newmascotresized: Lucy is THE BEST third Persona in the game. Why, you ask? It’s not because of her resistance to Ice or her trait, which gives you a 50% chance to avoid status ailments.

newmascotresized: No, it’s because of Life Wall. Life Wall is a full-party reflect that works for both magic and physical attacks. Life Wall can be used to cheese the SHIT out of bosses, even if it costs 95 SP.

Haru: “I’m sorry I kept you for so long. That’s all I wanted you to hear. From now on, I’ll fight even harder - to make up for all the trouble I’ve caused you.”

Haru: “Thank you. Hearing you say that makes me feel like I can do anything. I will grow even stronger. I have to keep pressing forward. For Father’s sake, too.”

newmascotresized: Tonight, we’re making curry. I thought there was a trophy for making the best curry and the best coffee, but that’s incorrect - it’s a Thieves Den award.

newmascotresized: Incidentally, we’re one trophy from the platinum at this point. The only one we won’t have by the end of this update is getting all the stamps in Mementos because that’s busy work.

MorganaCat: “… This curry sure has a lot of ingredients, doesn’t it? Did I see you put fruit in there?”

newmascotresized: I didn’t know these existed, and hell if I’m going to bother getting them all.

MorganaCat: “Huh… I never knew apples would go so well with spicy curry.”

newmascotresized: There’s a reading slot on the train this morning. I’m skipping it. I’m also skipping Haru complaining at us to go into Mementos. We’ll do that tomorrow.

newmascotresized: Today, we have Sumire’s Rank 6. It’s one of the longest confidant events in the game.

Sumire: “I am so, so sorry! Seeing me trying to act like Kasumi must have been so painful and awkward for everyone… everyone must have noticed that I was acting strangely…”

Sumire: “They were probably being nice to me, knowing I’d just lost my sister… but even then… I had no idea I was even supposed to be sad. I didn’t remember that my sister was gone.”

Sumire: “When my coach told me to ‘think about who I really am,’ I thought it was just… figurative. Something about my slump. I was just living my life - like I didn’t even care that she was gone! I can’t take this shame…”

newmascotresized: I don’t blame you if you’re not reading any of this, because I’m not. We fucking get it! Your sister is fucking dead! We’ve known this for HOURS at this point! Fuck!

newmascotresized: Have I mentioned there are TEN FUCKING DIALOG CHOICES in this event, and only one matters?

newmascotresized: TEN FUCKING DIALOG CHOICES! NONE OF THEM MATTER! FUCK!

Sumire: “…I appreciate what you’re saying, but… I still can’t forgive myself. Ever since we were kids, Kasumi was always the one who decided what I did, what I chose, where I went… I couldn’t do anything without her…”

Sumire: “I suppose it’s clear why my grades weren’t going up much. I was never on Kasumi’s level to begin with. I was so pretentious, so wrapped up in my own stupid little problems… I was too self-absorbed to do anything!”

Sumire: “… I’m starting to remember things from our past now. It’s hard, but I’m trying. There’s a lot. It covers everything, starting from when Kasumi and I first got into gymnastics up until just recently.”

Sumire: “I want to talk about how it used to be for Kasumi and me. Would you listen?”

newmascotresized: You know what would have been a thousand times more effective? If Kasumire had a dungeon with an interesting design and interesting gameplay mechanics where we could’ve learned this instead.

Sumire: “I was too little to really understand the sport or the rules… but everyone praised me when I did well. The coach would get me little rewards, like ice cream cones.”

Sumire: “We did our best trying to learn the moves and routines, since it kept getting us ice cream.”

newmascotresized: You know what this is? This is that one dipshit scene from the Wolfenstein reboot. I think I linked this in one of my other LPs, but that’s exactly what this is.

Sumire: “Yes. We were together every day. We ate our favorite ice cream together, we talked, we laughed… those days were so fun. And one day, around when we started going to junior meets, Kasumi asked me…”

Sumire: "…All with a straight face, of course. She could be really funny sometimes. So obviously, I told her, ‘Kasumi, you’re a super genius!’ "

Sumire: “Well, we were just kids. But she really was a genius, you know. Everything came so easily to her. And every day, she only got better.”

Sumire: “You remember what my coach said, Senpai? That my… well, that Kasumi’s greatest weapon was her boldness?”

Sumire: “Kasumi was always so bold. she was like a beacon of confidence. And one day, I realized I’d never catch up. It didn’t matter how hard I tried. I’d have consolation prizes for the rest of my life.”

Sumire: “Kasumi was always the one up on the podium. But… even when she won her ice cream, she never ate it without me. I always told her not to worry about me, but she still said she’d wait until we could enjoy it together.”

Sumire: “She really believed in me. She said we’d be the best in the world someday. She had her own practices to do, but she was always so busy helping me… she spent hours trying to help me.”

Sumire: “She was so kind and strong… she was the perfect older sister. …Kasumi’s kindness was so… so… infuriating.”

newmascotresized: WE FUCKING GET IT! You’ve spent the last fucking five minutes doing nothing but illustrating the fucking point of how much better your sister was than you! We fucking get it! Fuck!

Sumire: “She was always the one on the podium, surrounded by flashing cameras. But all I could do was watch from the shadows. I’m not Kasumi… and no matter what I do, I’ll never be like her!”

Sumire: “If she’d just given up on me, it wouldn’t have hurt so much! At least then people would stop trying to compare us!”

Sumire: “You’re right… I suppose I was just selfish, in the end. The thought kept coming back. Every day, my mind went back to it. Everyone would be better off if I didn’t exist.”

newmascotresized: Hold it. Hold on a fucking second. What you’re saying is that you don’t know why, it didn’t really matter how hard you tried, and that in the end it didn’t even matter even though you tried so hard and got so far.

newmascotresized: God dammit the writers just made a character who is a fucking early 2000s Linkin Park song. That band was a fucking mistake, just like fucking Creed.

Sumire: “The thought kept coming back. Every day, my mind went back to it. Everyone would be better off if I didn’t exist. Either that, or I should just be Kasumi. She’s the one people really want.”

Sumire: “Sumire’s the one who’s useless. Pointless. Who would care if she died? …But my sister died instead. Why did she have to protect an idiot like me? I… I watched her-”

Sumire: “Yes. I’m done running away. Akira-senpai… I can’t stop here. Now, I want to keep doing gymnastics as Sumire. I want to hit those heights Kasumi was aiming for. Otherwise… I’d never be able to face her.”

newmascotresized: No, you know what this is? This is the fucking sad song from Ouendan 2, only Ouendan 2 did it in about five minutes and with a fraction of the fucking text. I searched the thread and I don’t THINK I posted that before.

newmascotresized: I fucking hate that the writers could’ve done fucking ANYTHING for Sumire, and instead went with the most generic rehashed sports story imaginable.

Sumire: “Please… will you keep going out with me now that I’m Sumire? I want you to hold me to this. To make sure I don’t run away from who I am again.”

Sumire: “R-Really? Thank you so much… eheh… you must think I’m pretty lame. But… I guess that’s Sumire. That’s who I am. I have to be stronger. Both in my heart, and with my gymnastic skills…”

Sumire: “But for now… I’m Sumire Yoshizawa. And it’s nice to meet you, again.”

newmascotresized: Fitness Talk would’ve been nice, I dunno… back when we were still negotiating instead of just fusing the best Personas possible?

Sumire: “I think this really helped me. Now I can focus on turning over a new leaf, and doing my best. Let’s get some practice in before I have to go to club. We’ll be training even harder than before, Senpai. I’ll be extra strict from now on.”

newmascotresized: Joker gets +5 Max HP.

Sumire: “And I’m sorry you had to see such a pathetic side of me… as soon as I acknowledged myself as Sumire, my gymnastics training started to fall apart, too. …But this is the real me, I guess.”

Sumire: “Yes. I’m done turning my eyes from it. I need to move forward, even without Kasumi. It doesn’t matter how painful it is - I’ll accept everything.”

Sumire: “I’ll think about where Kasumi got her strength from. And what I can do as Sumire… I’ll calm down and think all of this through.”

newmascotresized: Thank god, she’s shut the fuck up. Here’s the thing: if I boiled down the actual contents of that confidant event into the salient points, I could have done it in five dialog boxes.

Sumire: “My sister is dead.”
Joker: “I know.”
Sumire: “She did gymnastics in Odaiba. Earned my first ice cream there. Sweet, sweet ice cream.”
Joker: “Great.”
Sumire: “Actually, I hate my sister.”

newmascotresized: Anyway, let’s do the stupid crossword puzzle for tonight and then go to sleep because we are fresh out of content.

newmascotresized: There’s nothing on the schedule today - Sumire’s not available, so we’re going in to Mementos.

newmascotresized: I’ll skip us getting free time via Kawakami in Hiruta’s class, since we don’t do anything with it.

Sumire: “Um… I know I’m still a newcomer, but I’ll make sure not to slow the group down. I’m looking forward to working with you all!”

Ryuji: “I keep tellin’ you, you don’t gotta be so formal! But if you want, I can teach you everything you gotta know about what we do as the Phantom Thieves…”

MorganaCat: “Sorry to interrupt, but I already explained everything to her.”

newmascotresized: It’s… not going to make us sit through another explanation? What?

Sumire: “Ah, yes! Morgana-senpai already taught me all about them!”

Ryuji: “O-Oh… yeah, okay then.”

Futaba: “Guess you missed your chance to become a senpai, Ryuji.”

Ryuji: “Sh-Shuddup! Wasn’t even aimin’ for that anyways!”

Sumire: “Oh, I-I’m so sorry…! I didn’t mean to ruin your chance to become a senpai…”

newmascotresized: What the fuck is this dialog?

Makoto: “Well then, let’s get back on topic.”

Akechi: “We should begin by investigating Mementos. But I’d prefer to avoid dying in vain due to a lack of preparation… therefore, it’s more important than ever that you all be in your best shape before proceeding.”

newmascotresized: I wish I had a SMART GIRL portrait for Akechi.

Makoto: “As usual, we’ll let Akira handle how we should proceed. Once we’re all prepared, let’s head into the Mementos.”

TYPO COUNTER: At least 10

newmascotresized: Both of these requests are labelled “Smax”. One of them is harder than most of the actual boss fights.

newmascotresized: This is going to be a prime example of the Hashino-Allanson Rule of Explanations. There’s absolutely no reason she couldn’t have said “Oh, this is Mementos? Morgana told me all about it.” and then let us get to some actual “gameplay”. I use that term loosely.

Panther: “Oh, right - this is Violet’s first trip into Mementos.”

Skull: “Well, check this shit out - this place is EVERYONE’S Palace.”

Violet: “I’m not exactly sure what that means, but I do get the sense that it’s important! Thanks for explaining!”

Skull: “Good job catchin’ up!”

Panther: “Buuut, doesn’t it feel like the place has… changed, somehow? Or was it always like this?”

Skull: “Think so? Looks the same as usual to me.”

Queen: “You’re kidding, right? This place has always looked rather bizarre, but the massive cables are a recent addition.”

Skull: “O-Oh yeah…?”

BlackMask: “They appear to be the same cables as those we found in Maruki’s Palace. It looks like our theory about them affecting this place was accurate.”

Oracle: “Yep, we nailed that one - better than we thought we did, too. I’m getting strong readings all the way down… it leads all the way to where we found the Holy Grail.”

Noir: “But the God of Control isn’t there anymore, right?”

Morgana: “Why don’t we check it out ourselves? I’ve got something I want Violet to see, too.”

Violet: “Me?”

Morgana: “How’s about THAT!?”

Violet: “Oh… hmh.”

Panther: “Talk about a low-key reaction…”

Violet: “Well, it wasn’t really out of my depth to imagine a cat turning into a bus…”

Morgana: “But, but - my transformation…!”

Skull: “Wow, he actually let the ‘cat’ part slide that time…”

Noir: “Yes, it’s that ability to imagine it so easily that allows Morgana to transform in the first place.”

BlackMask: “Let’s go already. Standing around here’s a waste of time.”

Morgana: “B-But my main point is, I’m in a totally different league than those other buses. Hop in - you’ll see what it’s like riding in a high purr-formance vehicle!”

newmascotresized: No, Morgana, that’s how the cats from Monster Hunter talk. They’re better than you.

newmascotresized: Anyway, we have to warp all the way the hell down to the big door to the final dungeon.

Queen: “This room…”

Fox: “Indeed - I could never forget. But this is all…”

newmascotresized: This is Yusuke’s first line today. I think the writers kinda forgot he exists.

Violet: “These are all more of those cables, right? They must be coming from all over Mementos and gathering in this spot…”

Oracle: “…Actually? It’s the opposite. They’re not gathering in Mementos… they’re spreading. This is the point of origin.”

Morgana: “After all, this place is the core of the masses’ consciousness. If you want to manipulate Mementos, there’s nowhere better to start than the very heart of it…”

BlackMask: “So it intends to reach its roots from here to every corner of civilization… that’s such a desperate move, it makes me sick.”

newmascotresized: How is that desperate? What part of that is desperate? What the fuck are you even talking about?

Panther: “Hey, look at that!”

Morgana: “That’s the one handling all the data from Maruki’s Palace. What’s our next move, Joker? Should we follow where it leads?”

newmascotresized: Right nearby is the entrance to Maruki’s area of Mementos. If you’ve played Shin Megami Tensei V, the name might sound familiar.

newmascotresized: Welcome to the Path of Da’at.

Violet: “Hm? What’s that?”

Panther: “Oh, Jose.”

Violet: “Wait… a kid? Driving? And you all happen to know him already? Is there anybody you don’t know?”

Jose: “There’s a flower here… but this one smells a bit different from the others. Let’s see how it tastes… gah!”

Jose: “Aw, I guess I shouldn’t be picky. I’m going to move on further. Are you guys doing the same?”

Jose: “I see. Whether or not you do, let me know if you find any more flowers. I’ll reward you well for them. Well, good job.”

Violet: “What an odd kid.”

BlackMask: “It would be much odder if the Metaverse were as logical as the real world is.”

Oracle: “Be careful if you’re going any further, all right? I’m getting all sorts of strange readings - Shadows too.”

newmascotresized: Now, you’re probably thinking something like: “If this is a $60 expansion, did they at least do something with the Mementos segments to make it not pure filler” and the answer is no.

newmascotresized: All of the enemies are identical to the ones found at the end of the game, during the run to where Yaldabaoth was. There’s nothing new here.

newmascotresized: All of the Treasure Demons spawn in Da’at, so you can get everything from Regent to Crystal Skull.

newmascotresized: A couple floors in, I start feeling bored and wait two minutes. We’re going to take on the Reaper.

newmascotresized: When the Reaper spawns, you get this red shimmering effect on the screen. As soon as you see that, Tatsuya Sudou is after you and will not stop chasing you until you die or touch the stairs.

newmascotresized: One annoying thing about Da’at is that unlike all the other areas of Mementos (where going down is advancing), you go UPSTAIRS to advance, which kept throwing me for a loop.

newmascotresized: The best way to fight the Reaper is to let him ambush you. I didn’t do that here because he’s piss-easy at this point, but doing so makes him only get one action per turn instead of two.

newmascotresized: The Reaper wasn’t re-balanced for Royal, and it shows.

newmascotresized: His moveset consists of Concentrate, all the -dyne and ma-dyne spells, Megidolaon and a single Physical and Gun attack. What’s more important is that he has Breaks for Fire, Wind, Elec, and Ice.

newmascotresized: He also has Hamaon and Mudoon, as well as their multi-target versions. Bringing any physical attacker here is not a great idea - being at low HP doesn’t stop casters from doing damage, but it does basically shut Yusuke down.

newmascotresized: I have Yusuke bring out the big guns and start buffing. However, I didn’t really need to. You see, there’s one thing that breaks the Reaper’s AI - and that is having multiple party members that resist things.

newmascotresized: The Reaper’s AI prefers to use Breaks to remove any possible resistances before resorting to his real spells. Because all of our party members have a Null and a Resist (along with Joker being able to block the entire elemental spectrum) he’s going to need to use this a lot.

newmascotresized: With everyone Charged and buffed, the party knocks off a pretty significant chunk of the Reaper’s HP in one go.

newmascotresized: The Reaper gets his only real attack in here, which knocks Yusuke down. However…

newmascotresized: In doing so, he triggers a Showtime that brings him down to half health. At half health, the Reaper is supposed to start spamming multi-target instakills… but he never does.

newmascotresized: He uses Mudoon on Ann and then for some reason uses Wind Break twice.

newmascotresized: Makoto throws in a Checkmate and from there the Reaper goes down without doing much. I have a feeling this is because the party collectively has so many resists that they can’t all be broken at once.

newmascotresized: Killing the Reaper gets us four to five levels for everyone.

newmascotresized: The rest of this area is a joke. We can insta-kill everything, up to and including Abaddon.

newmascotresized: Floor 3 is where our first target is. I’ll skip there since nothing else interesting happens.

Oracle: “Let’s change her heart, for her child!”

Fox: “Kuniko Kagami. You are the mother who doesn’t properly care for her children, correct?”

Fox: “…Something is wrong with her.”

Queen: “Could this be what people call… self-neglect? Not being able to sustain a normal life to the point where it’s damaging to their health…”

Oracle: “I remember the request saying something about the room being messy! So not only was she neglecting her children, but herself as well!?”

Queen: “That’s not true. What about your child?”

Oracle: “That’s wrong…! Joker, we have to stop her!”

newmascotresized: You might ask “Did they do anything but take a Rangda and give it stat buffs?” and the answer is fuck no they didn’t, what do you think this is, a game that had effort put into it?

newmascotresized: The only difference here is that this Rangda can cast Makarakarn, but still has the weakness to Bless.

newmascotresized: I wound up bringing in Sumire and Haru simply because Rangda reflects Physical, meaning Yusuke is useless.

newmascotresized: The dialog here takes several minutes longer than the fight itself did.

newmascotresized: By the way, there are 40 fucking stamps in this final area, which has only 14 floors - 13 of which can spawn stamps. Getting all the stamps here is a goddamn ordeal.

newmascotresized: Now we get to the actually difficult miniboss. Where have I heard that last name before? Minamoto… Minamoto…

Queen: “He wants to die because he hurt his sister… we can’t leave him.”

Oracle: “He does look like he’s got the resolve of someone who wants to commit suicide. Be careful, Joker!”

Queen: “We’re not here to kill you. We’re here to change your heart.”

Skull: “Think it over harder! There’s still a part of you that wants to protect her, even if it means giving up your time, right!?”

Oracle: “Watch out, Joker! He’s attacking!”

newmascotresized: This fight is what happens when I don’t have the guide up to remind me that it’s against Yoshitsune.

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, there’s no easy way to do this fight. You can certainly make it impossible for him to win (remember, Yoshitsune is a pure physical Persona with no magic) but he’ll still be annoying.

newmascotresized: Just like our Yoshitsune, he has Hassou Tobi.

newmascotresized: He also has Charge. If he manages to hit you with a charged Hassou Tobi, it’s probably going to be a game over unless Joker is immune to physical.

newmascotresized: Sure, it looks like we’re winning now…

newmascotresized: Except then, Yoshitsune uses Heat Riser and Charge.

newmascotresized: I had to pull Ann out because Yoshitsune resists fire. This attack instakills Makoto and Haru - Yusuke gets an evade due to his high agility and Joker repels phys.

newmascotresized: Fortunately, Yoshitsune is already low on HP, and having two party members go down (or trigger Endure) gives us a Showtime.

newmascotresized: The next turn, Futaba activates Ultimate Support. Everyone is now fully healed, buffed, and charge/concentrated… and Yoshitsune dies on the next turn.

newmascotresized: I really wish they had done more fights like this. The last two are against enemies that have weaknesses.

Queen: “Are you all right? Have you calmed down? It must have been hard to tell yourself that you hate your sister.”

Queen: “Huh…?”

Queen: “Does that mean… you really did hate your sister?”

newmascotresized: Well, glad that’s over. There’s nothing much else to do here but suffer through another 7 or 8 floors of randomly-generated hallways with enemies we can simply run over without fighting. Quality expansion we’ve got here.

newmascotresized: We trade our last crystal skull to Jose for a ring. That’s okay, we can just summon crystal skulls right out of the compendium now.

newmascotresized: The reason was so that I could get the last black items I need to get Sumire and Akechi’s ultimate guns… but then I decided there’s not much of a point to deleting half of Joker’s Personas just to itemize the guns.

newmascotresized: By the way, the last trophy we don’t have is for getting all the stamps. We can do that in a side update because that’s like two hours of grinding.

newmascotresized: And now, have my favorite random Mementos dialog bit so far, and by favorite I mean most rage-inducing.

newmascotresized: “It sure is cool how we follow basic character design principles for a JRPG and aren’t all anime swordsmen… except wait, we’re not because Sumire and Akechi both use swords and Joker uses a knife.”

Oracle: “This is the central data hub. This room’s most likely where the data sent over from the Palace goes.”

Panther: “Hey, what’s that on the screen?”

BlackMask: “I presume this is less about surveillance and more about looking for targets, though.”

newmascotresized: Metal Gear!?

BlackMask: “Think about it. While all sorts of unnatural events may be taking place in Maruki’s reality… that doesn’t mean every human’s wish has already been granted.”

Queen: “That’s a good point. If everyone’s wishes were already made into reality, there wouldn’t be any requests on the Phan-Site.”

BlackMask: “Exactly. Therefore, Maruki is likely choosing certain targets with this system, then affecting each one individually. Probably using the same method as when he made Violet’s Persona go berserk that one time.”

newmascotresized: Wasn’t making shit go berserk Akechi’s power? Oh wait, that’s practically non-canon because it only comes up in one scene and is promptly forgotten about, and also has zero net effect on the plot.

Violet: “Wha… me!? From what I remember, Dr. Maruki summoned these things that look like tendrils, and they grabbed me. Wait, don’t tell me, are these…?”

newmascotresized: Wait a second. A thing with tentacles that tries to put people in a world where all dreams come to life? Isn’t this just that one episode of Futurama?

Noir: “You mean to say, these cables all across Maruki’s Palace and Mementos, they’re part of his… methods?”

BlackMask: “Yes, that hypothesis explains much of what we’ve seen if it were found to be true. Maruki is extending these cables from his own Palace, tunneling into the depths of Mementos…”

BlackMask: “And spreading his influence from the same place the Holy Grail once occupied. That allows him to grant the ‘wishes’ of any people he may discover once they’ve fallen under his influence.”

newmascotresized: You might wondering if any of this is part of the argument the party will present against Maruki, and it’s not.

Skull: “Psh, screw that.”

Noir: “Mmhm! This won’t last much longer now that we’re here!”

Oracle: " 'Kay, but I’m the one who has to do the actual hacking, though."

Skull: “Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”

Panther: “Well, the displays are showing parts of Mementos, right? I guess we can suspend something here?”

Oracle: “You got it - I like the way you think!”

Skull: “Yeah, go ahead an shut up now. We ain’t resumin’ shit.”

Fox: “Does this bring us any closer to stopping Maruki?”

Oracle: “All we did was suspend the data sharing. Stopping Maruki’s a whole other story. I don’t think this’ll interfere with his effect on Mementos.”

Queen: “What? Then what good does suspending the data stream do?”

Oracle: “According to this console’s output, all the cable-tendrils are retracted now. Possibly including someplace in the Palace that was blocked before?”

Noir: “We won’t know unless we check it out for ourselves. What say we head to the Palace next?”

newmascotresized: Why don’t we go someplace that isn’t randomly-generated filler?

newmascotresized: As a final fuck you, the game doesn’t let you warp back to the start of Mementos from this room.

newmascotresized: I hope you’re ready for being bombarded by fucking pointless IMs, because I sure as hell wasn’t.

MorganaCat: “Heh. You’d think she would be a little more honest with herself. But if you think about it… we’d never have fixed this without Futaba. If we’d just passed it off as a false alarm, who knows how much worse their lives would have gotten?”

MorganaCat: “Futaba picked up on that cry for help. She was kind enough to fight for them. That’s how we saved that family.”

MorganaCat: “Hey… that’s pretty much what the guy was saying in Mementos. I guess they really do have that sibling connection, huh?”

MorganaCat: “So. They ended up living together, huh? I can’t tell you if that’s a good idea or not, but… as long as they can remember how much they care for each other, I think they’ll be okay.”

MorganaCat: “Right… Makoto lives with her sister, too. It’s just the two of them there… I guess she’s dealing with a lot herself. She’s acknowledged her own conflicting feelings, huh? This request really made us think…”

newmascotresized: It made me think about how much Royal sucks. Seriously, who the fuck looked at this and said “This is okay. We can release this at a $60 pricepoint when it’s 60% randomly generated content.”

newmascotresized: You see, when you’re a poorly-written anime cliche, you don’t have to worry about things like stamina.

newmascotresized: We’re not doing anything tonight anyway, so let’s call it here. Next time: Sumire. Then more Sumire. Then more Sumire. Then maybe I do a side update where I get all the stamps and fight Jose. Fuck this trashfire of a game.

newmascotresized: By the way, the Reaper is available as a statue in Joker’s mind dungeon, representing how he’s actually a reincarnation of Tatsuya Sudou who is going to have a fucking rad ending where he brutally fucking murders Maruki. I wish.

newmascotresized: Fuck, I need an update title. Shit. Wait, I know.

newmascotresized: No More Heroes 2 was a good game brought down by a few terrible fights and the godawful strength training minigame.

By the way, people might be curious now that we’re nearly done with the game what my next LP will be. I don’t know. If you’ve got any suggestions, let me know.

Summary

newmascotresized: I spent like 20 minutes grinding stamps in Mementos and got to 31/40 in Path of Da’at before I realized that the wiki is FUCKING WRONG!

newmascotresized: The criteria for fighting Jose is NOT having all the stamps. It’s having at least 123 stamps collected total. We had more than that before we even reached the expansion.

newmascotresized: There is a trophy for getting all the stamps and fuck you I’m not grinding it because it’s like wearing a badge that says “I’m a dipshit who spent hours pointlessly grinding Mementos for dumbass bullshit”.

newmascotresized: Anyway, if you go back to the Cognitive Control Room, Jose is there. He gives this big long speech about the nature of man that honestly I do not give a FUCK about. It’s like 50 textboxes long.

newmascotresized: At level 90, Jose is piss fucking easy. Here’s the trick. You spam Life Wall. That’s all you do.

newmascotresized: He opens with Drift, because Jose is the writers for Royal admitting that Yoko Taro is better than them. They’re mad they didn’t get Emil.

newmascotresized: Watch out motherfucker, here comes a special boy!

newmascotresized: I didn’t capture it, but it takes about half of Haru and Makoto’s health off. You do NOT want to bring Yusuke for this because Jose resists Physical.

newmascotresized: All of Jose’s other attacks are repackaged ma-dyne spells. You know what that means?

newmascotresized: It means that every time he attacks, he takes somewhere in the neighborhood of 500 to 600 damage, that’s what.

newmascotresized: The rest is basic - we have Joker use Thermopylae and Ann follow up with High Energy to get everyone Concentrated.

newmascotresized: Jose has more HP than the Reaper does, which is kinda bullshit because Tatsuya Sudou could kick this kid’s ass. He casts “Knife you in the fucking gut” and it does 9999 damage and you fucking die.

newmascotresized: Boing!

newmascotresized: Have a blessed day, motherfucker!

newmascotresized: Haru runs out of SP, so I have Joker use a Soma. I imagine him stuffing a stick of butter in her mouth and then she can cast spells again.

newmascotresized: Because Haru was out of SP, we went a turn without being able to cast Life Wall.

newmascotresized: It does basically nothing even when it hits.

newmascotresized: A turn later, Jose gets serious. He uses Launch, which is a setup for a big Almighty attack next turn. We can’t reflect that, because… I dunno.

newmascotresized: Unfortunately, we can’t use this full-party Concentrate because we have to guard.

newmascotresized: What the fuck is this, Paper fucking Mario?

newmascotresized: I accidentally didn’t dodge with Ann, but it doesn’t matter because she dodged it.

newmascotresized: Jose is watching as a drunk and overtired Makoto gives him the finger and then throws a beer bottle at him.

newmascotresized: Oh fuck!

newmascotresized: Ann once again proves her worth as the best party member in this game.

Jose: “Good job all around. Sorry about that…”

Jose: “Painfully well, hahaha… thanks to all of you, I-”

Oracle: “Ooh! Didja learn something new!?”

Jose: “I’m pretty sure I understand humans less than ever!”

Panther: “Wha…”

Fox: “I was anticipating he’d say the exact opposite.”

Violet: “Yeah, I was hoping things would end on a happy note here.”

Queen: “Well, this is an issue…”

Noir: “I’m sorry we couldn’t help you.”

Jose: “Why are you sorry?”

Skull: “Well, you did say you understand humans even less now, an’ all…”

Jose: “That’s great news.”

Jose: “Humans aren’t the easiest to comprehend. That’s why they can get lost and look for other people they trust. Sometimes, they even try to accomplish the impossible with those people…”

Jose: “Like you all just tried to do for me. Now I’m sure that’s what it means to be a human. So, it’s impossible to learn everything about humans in such a short time. Although, it did make me realize just how much I love them!”

BlackMask: “So our assistance… was to your satisfaction?”

newmascotresized: And here’s the fucking throwaway “Haha guys we actually remember Persona 2” line that pisses me the fuck off. Yes, Jose is a fucking servant of Philemon.

newmascotresized: Why couldn’t they have given me a fucking scene where Philemon just fucking rolls up and is like “Pardon my idiot son” and then you beat the shit out of him?

Panther: “Hey Jose, who’s this person you keep mentioning? And while we’re at it - who’re YOU?”

newmascotresized: “I’m Igor’s replacement because his voiceactor has been dead since Persona 4 and that’s kinda inconvenient for everyone!”

Jose: “I… I am me. I’m Jose, a boy who got a little smarter, because I met all of you. No matter who we are, we’re always searching for our selves. Just remember, there are more folks observing humankind than you might realize.”

newmascotresized: Fuck you! That’s a fucking line from Persona 4’s opening! Fuck you! Persona 4 was at least an acceptable JRPG and not whatever this dumb bullshit is! Fuck! Shit!

newmascotresized: FUCK HASHINO! Fuck this game! Fuck everything!

Jose: “I knew you would! Thank you again. I have something for you - to thank you for spending so much time with me. Here. Take this.”

newmascotresized: What’s this do? FUCKING NOTHING, that’s what it does.

Jose: “Heheh… this is so interesting. Oh, humans… no wonder the others just can’t leave 'em be.”

Morgana: “Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?”

Jose: “Don’t worry, it’s nothing. See ya, guys! Thank you so much! Oh, I hope you’ll still help me collect flowers, too. Off I go! Good job!”

newmascotresized: Jose died on the way back to his home planet.

newmascotresized: What the fuck is this, a 90s primetime sitcom? Anyway, that’s over and now I can go to bed.

It’s a shame that with Akechi hanging around there’s not more pushback with him suggesting evil or just brutally pragmatic options. No “I push the guard off the ledge” or “I shoot the hostage through their shoulder” moments. Not even a “We’re going to try to change Maruki.” “YOU’RE going to try to change Maruki, if it takes longer than five minutes I’m double tapping him.”

Also I have no frame of reference because I’ve never had long hair, but do you think it feels weird when Kasumi Sumire’s hair magically gets pull back into the Kasumi Violet style when they pop into a mind dungeon?

You’ve got a repeat in the game talking about putting apples in curry, and another for the one about New Year’s resolutions.

You’d think if the party had a bunch of nulls he’d start spamming Megidolaon. That’s standard fare for pissed-off SMT bosses. I guess the Reaper isn’t a boss, but you know what I mean.

“It’s neat how modern JRPGs have clung to the classic JRPG mechanic of class-specific equipment while also boiling it down to a simplified form that robs it of its actual gameplay purpose” was, I assume, the original line, but Hashino had it changed.

Hats off to the Eternal Punishment translation team for starting and finishing a translation of Fate/Extra–a game that already has an official translation–before finishing EP.

But anyway…a game that’s suited for a screenshot LP, that I want to see, but that I don’t actually want to play or even want a friend to play for me. Let me just roll my D99 of Joke (?) Answers and see what we get. <dice sounds> And my suggestion is…Hyperdimension Neptunia???

Click Here for Update 111

newmascotresized: I read back through a couple of my more recent updates, and I’m starting to realize that it seems like I sound a little too bitter about this game - but you have to understand that this part of the game drags real hard.

Ushimaru: “…No, it’s fine. Let him sleep. Students are busy - it’s normal to be tired. I’m a little sleepy myself. I was playing pretend Featherman with my grandchild yesterday and I got a little too invested…”

newmascotresized: Bullshit. I refuse to believe he’s not reliving his glory days in the Heike clan fighting against the Genji clan.

Ushimaru: “What? You all don’t know Featherman? It’s a sentai series that teaches you about justice. We’ll watch it in class someday. …Speaking of which, did you know the concept of ‘justice’ is different in western culture and eastern culture?”

Ushimaru: “Kurusu, look at this.”

Ushimaru: “She holds a set of scales and a sword, and she’s stepping on something… do you know what she’s stepping on?”

Ushimaru: “Wonderful. That’s correct. A lot of stories tend to paint snakes as a symbol of sin, or some kind of agent of evil. In western culture, justice tends to be about enforcing the rules.”

Ushimaru: “If you want everyone to live in harmony, rules are absolutely necessary… so anyone who disrupts those rules might just end up like this snake.”

Ushimaru: “Eastern culture, on the other hand, views justice more like acting and thinking ethically. This exists in the individual. In other words… all humans have their own sense of justice.”

Ushimaru: “It’s not an easy way to live, but… I’m sure you will all be fine. Oh, time’s almost up. So about your homework… none for today! Get some rest. But make sure you’re awake for the next class, all right?”

MorganaCat: “Ushimaru’s really… I’m getting the shivers.”

newmascotresized: And now… it’s nothing but Sumire. Fuck.

Sumire: “It’s a special program that revolves around boxercising. It relieves stress, and it’s open to the public… I was thinking you could come along if you wanted.”

newmascotresized: I actually did something like that for a little bit during the pandemic - my mom bought into this on-demand workout video thing and I dropped it after I realized how dumb it was.

Sumire: “I’ll introduce you to coach Hiraguchi-san once my lesson ends. She’s an amazing person. She’s been guiding Kasumi and me since we were little.”

newmascotresized: Oh hi, Kasumi. I thought the entire plot was that you were dead.

Sumire: “It gets tough after a while. Your limbs start feeling heavier the longer you keep them up. Whenever we did this before, all I could focus on was how well Kasumi was doing. And how much I wanted to stop.”

Sumire: “Kasumi was probably so disappointed in me… I got tired out so quick…”

newmascotresized: Get used to the “10 choice” format where half the choices don’t matter.

Sumire: “I know I disappointed myself, at least. Kasumi never doubted herself for a second… and then there’s me… oh… I think it’s almost time for my coach to show up. I’m kind of nervous.”

Sumire: “You could say that. She’s tough on us, but she’s a great mentor. She’s been helping Kasumi and me for a long time. Even through all my stupid delusions as Kasumi, she never stopped helping me… I don’t know what I’d do without her.”

newmascotresized: …Why is Sumire’s coach a more-or-less accurately aged Jill Valentine?

Sumire: “Y-Yes… I’m sorry I worried you. Um, I’ve… I’ve been running away from what happened to my sister.”

newmascotresized: So what you’re saying is that this is Sumire’s… Last Escape?

Sumire: “I’m not totally back to my normal self, but I’m working towards a new goal. I want to be the best in the world… so now, I’m going to do what I can as Sumire.”

Hiraguchi: “I see… by the way, who’s this?”

Sumire: “Oh, um, this is my senpai from school. We both came here for a lesson.”

Hiraguchi: “Oh, so you’re… fine. Let’s have you go first, Sumire. You can start with your combination.”

Sumire: “Y-Yes, ma’am!”

Hiraguchi: “…Okay, you can take a break. We’ll do some more later.”

Sumire: “Phew… hah… th-thank you very much!”

Sumire: “So… how did I do? I tried to put some real force into that combination.”

Hiraguchi: “…You said you were going to perform as Sumire this time. I didn’t see that at all. All I saw out there was Kasumi… or a shadow of her, at least.”

Sumire: “Wh-what…?”

Hiraguchi: “Kasumi defined her performance by boldness, yes. But that’s not something you can appropriate for yourself. It came from the energy within her. That’s what made her Kasumi.”

Hiraguchi: “I told you to think about who you really are. Seems like you still don’t understand what I meant.”

newmascotresized: This reminds me so much of this manga I read called Oshi no Ko, which starts out as an isekai and promptly forgets that in favor of becoming a special interest manga about acting.

newmascotresized: Halfway through, the main character starts getting into fucking acting fights, and that’s the kind of shit they say during those.

Sumire: “…”

Hiraguchi: “You need to stop hiding behind Kasumi. If you keep denying yourself like this, how can she still call you her rival?”

Sumire: …“Huh!? What’s that supposed to…?”

Hiraguchi: “I never wanted to draw attention to it, but Kasumi had a very competitive streak. She hated to lose. She would always tell me… she was so jealous of her little sister, and her delicate, graceful style.”

Hiraguchi: " ‘I can’t lose to her’, she said. She wanted you to see that."

Sumire: “She… she said that? Th-that’s… impossible. Kasumi could do anything, and I… I was nothing…”

Hiraguchi: “I’ve said all I wanted to say. But I suggest you think a little harder about it.”

Sumire: “…”

Hiraguchi: “Okay, it’s your turn now! Get ready!”

Sumire: “Thank you, but I’m fine. I noticed she was quite impressed with your physical abilities. Compared to you, though… I was pitiful. Me, graceful…?”

Sumire: “Now that I think about it, I guess that’s the one thing my coach used to compliment me on. But even with that, I couldn’t match Kasumi’s performance at all. …And now she says Kasumi saw me as a rival…? I don’t believe it.”

Sumire: “I mean, all I was doing was imitating her. Even since the beginning, I was just following Kasumi… that was fine in the beginning. I loved being with Kasumi, and it was fun.”

Sumire: “But ever since I started noticing the difference in our gymnastic skills, one thing became clear… I’ll always be someone less than Kasumi. I’m just worthless after all…”

Sumire: “Thank you for saying that. You’re very kind, Senpai. Still, something occurred to me when Coach told me what Kasumi said. I realized… just like she wanted to show me what she could do, I still want you to see my own abilities.”

Sumire: “You remember? Like when I tried to show off back at the batting cages? Oh… maybe that’s what I need to chase. Maybe that feeling can help me get some confidence!”

Sumire: “It sounds like even Kasumi liked my more subtle and delicate moves, so… if I mix it with her aggressive style…”

newmascotresized: This is effectively a direct reference to Sumire’s Showtime attack. Most people are only going to see it on the day you fight Maruki, because it only unlocks when her confidant is maxed.

newmascotresized: This scene makes more sense as an unlock scene than the actual unlock scene, so let’s pretend it unlocks here. I’ll go borrow some footage.

newmascotresized: Sumire’s Showtime is the only one with a name that makes sense. Its Japanese name is “Dances with Phantoms”, and it’s less a Showtime between Sumire and Joker as much as it is between Sumire and herself.

newmascotresized: The footage was taken from this video.

newmascotresized: There’s a couple of frames of pure motion blur that are impossible to capture.

newmascotresized: It’s not a Hashino game without creepshots of underage girls.

newmascotresized: You may recognize this last shot from the Yusu-Gay I posted after the school festival. Oh, and add “The fact that Dances with Wolves was not in fact about dancing” to the list of shit the writers don’t understand.

newmascotresized: In case you’re wondering what the English name for that attack is, it’s “Dances with Thieves” which completely misses the fucking point.

Sumire: “Right? Maybe I’ll be able to step up my routine! If the key here is showing you what I can do, then I just need you to watch me again…! Senpai, will you go out with me again?”

Sumire: “Th-Thank you so much. As long as I’ve got you behind me, Senpai, I can keep moving forward.”

Sumire: “I’ll think about what else I can do. When I figure it out, I’ll let you know. Oh, is it time already? Let’s get going.”

Sumire: “Coach Hiraguchi’s so strict, isn’t she? She wasn’t going easy on you at all… she used to make me and Kasumi work so hard. She was so harsh, she even made me cry a couple times.”

Sumire: “But Kasumi said she was probably tough on us because she saw our potential. Thanks to Kasumi supporting me with her strength, I kept working hard.”

Sumire: “It didn’t seem like you were struggling at all, though. You might be just as tough as Kasumi… amazing.”

Sumire: “Oh, I see… so you let the struggle fuel you. I wish I could do that. I can’t stop thinking about what she mentioned, though… my own energy, huh…? I guess I’m the only one who can find that answer.”

newmascotresized: Thank fuck that’s over. This entire situation with Sumire feels like the writers forgot she existed for half the game and realized it only when they had gotten to the end of the game.

newmascotresized: We can buy the Supernova Burger at Big Bang Burger to do the final trade in Kichijoji. This gets you a Soma, so it’s totally worth it.

newmascotresized: You know, Persona 5 Royal is a lot like how I once heard someone describe what watching Lucky Star in reverse would be like. Joker has run out of things to do, and all that’s left is to talk to Sumire.

newmascotresized: The joke is that they’re dressing Sumire like an old anime lady.

Sumire: “I see. Well, I guess it’s important to have a balanced diet…?”

newmascotresized: Joker stands there and shouts “Walk up to Sumire!”

Sumire: “Oh, Akira-senpai! I’m glad you made it!”

Sumire: “I tried this ensemble based on the staff’s advice, but what do you think? I’ve definitely been getting attention in this. Some people are even staring! This is sort of like showing off my own style, right!?”

newmascotresized: Sumire is too dumb to live.

Sumire: “O-Oh, you don’t like it? I thought it was a pretty cool outfit… well, to be honest, I could tell some of this was a little off. I mean, they say these are leopard spots, but it could just as easily be some kind of… mutant giraffe. Anyway, I should change.”

Sumire: “…So once again, I totally misinterpreted everything and made no progress at all. Classic Sumire. I wasn’t like this when I was looking for my father’s glasses… I feel like I’m doing so much worse than when I thought I was Kasumi…”

Sumire: “I don’t even know if I’m worth showing off, let alone how to do it.”

Sumire: “You’re right. I have you, Senpai. I need to make sure you see the real me… Okay. I don’t have time to be lost in my thoughts. I’ll find some clothes that’ll help me show off my true self!”

Sumire: “But still… look at how many different styles there are. Huh? Why does this sweater have a hole…? Where is this string going…? Um, what do I do now…? This is a lot harder than I thought.”

Sumire: “Hmm… this isn’t it… all of these clothes are very stylish, but I’m not sure I’d really want to be seen in them… how do I want to be seen…?”

newmascotresized: Hopefully as little as possible, because fuck I already hate you.

Sumire: “Or… how do I want Senpai to see me? Senpai… Senpai… hmm…”

newmascotresized: Seriously though, I thought Akechi’s writing sucked. This is something fucking else.

Sumire: “W-Well, yes…! But if you look at me, I don’t know what to do! …Oh! R-Right. Maybe it shouldn’t be that one-sided… if I give other people attention, then surely I’d get attention in return.”

Sumire: “I think I get it. Oh…! I think I’ll try on… this one!”

Sumire: “Um, what do you think?”

Sumire: “Wh…What!? D-Did you just say what I think you said!? You said you’re… in love…?”

Sumire: “S-Sorry, I know you didn’t mean anything by it, I just wasn’t ready, I mean my heart wasn’t, so I’m kind of- H-Hold on, I need to calm down… okay, deep breaths… hahhh, phew…”

Sumire: “B-But I really am happy to hear that. Thank you. For letting me show you a part of myself. I’ve made up my mind. Um, could you wait here for a second? I need to go buy this.”

newmascotresized: Does this event ever fucking end? Holy shit.

Sumire: “Umm, I’m not sure if I can call it an answer, but… thanks to you, I think I realized something. When I first saw that piece, I kind of fell in love with it. And um… it’s a little embarrassing to say this, but…”

Sumire: “My first thought was that I couldn’t wait for you to see me in it. I wondered what kind of face you’d make, or how you’d react… I wanted to see that side of you…”

Sumire: “Oh, um - I don’t mean anything weird by that. I just wanted to… show myself off to you, I guess. To see you, and be seen. The more I thought about it, the more important that feeling became.”

newmascotresized: Who the hell wrote this? What dipshit thought that actual people talk like this?

Sumire: “And then, suddenly, I just… realized I wasn’t nervous anymore.”

Sumire: “I’ve always been really bad at making decisions on my own… I mean, Kasumi always picked perfect things for me anyway. I never knew making my own decisions could feel validating.”

Sumire: “So I didn’t really feel a need to choose anything for myself. After all, nobody expected me to. But today, I picked something because I liked it. And I felt confident in that.”

Sumire: “Even if you didn’t like it… I don’t think that’d change how I feel about it.”

newmascotresized: You know how I can tell no one proofread this shit? I can tell because anyone who proofread this would immediately go “This conversation fucking drags” and cut half of it out.

Sumire: “Yes! And I feel great about it! Is this what Coach meant? About Kasumi wanting me to see how she felt…? If that’s true, then… did she really think I was…?”

Sumire: “Well, I can’t say for sure… but I think as long as I’ve got you supporting me, I’ll be okay.”

Sumire: “Now, we should head home. Thanks for coming out with me today. Oh, should we go buy some clothes for you next time? You could always try on that savannah ensemble. I think it might even suit you better than me… maybe.”

Sumire: “Having you watch helped me find something I really liked. Oh, um… when I say it like that, it’s actually a little embarrassing… b-by the way, where do you like to get your clothes from, Senpai?”

newmascotresized: Joker’s like “The clothes I get from dead demons are technically in a world inside my cell phone, so I’ll say that’s online.”

Sumire: “I see. Well, online shopping’s definitely convenient. But don’t you get worried? The clothes always look so different in person than they do in the display pictures…”

Sumire: “I’d love to hear what you consider when you’re picking things out. Isn’t it so fun to pick out clothes, though? That one I bought today was so gorgeous. It’s almost too nice for me to actually wear it.”

Sumire: “Though I guess that defeats the purpose, if I want people to see me in it… ahaha. Oh, I guess I’d better let you go. Talk to you later…”

newmascotresized: We spend the night sipping boyfriend juice at the club with Yusuke, because…

newmascotresized: It gets us Arms Master. One of the reasons I don’t typically use the physical-type characters in Persona games is because they can get shut down very easily - their offense is entirely dependent on their HP, whereas Ann doesn’t really give a shit how much HP she has so long as she has SP.

newmascotresized: Arms Master lowers the chances of Yusuke getting oneshotted after using skills, and also makes it harder for enemies to shut him down completely.

newmascotresized: There’s a segment on the train I’m going to skip, because it’s letting you know about the fishing pond - we did an event with Ryuji and Kawakami there once.

newmascotresized: The fishing minigame is god the fuck awful. I tried it offscreen, and it’s… bad. You have to catch fish to get bait to catch bigger fish and the whole thing is totally not worth it.

newmascotresized: We have Sumire’s Rank 9 today. Buckle up for another conversation that’s going to drag the fuck out as long as possible.

Sumire: “Thank you. I just needed to talk to you about something in person.”

Sumire: “Mm… it’s really good. Something about it is relaxing. I think I’ll be ready to show Coach Hiraguchi my performance soon. And if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like you to be there when I do… is that okay?”

Sumire: “Great! I’m so glad… but that’s not what I came here to talk about. Do you remember what I said when we went clothes shopping? I talked about wanting you to see me, and how that helped me stop worrying?”

Sumire: “I’m so glad you remember. I was thinking about Kasumi… I wondered how she must have felt. Thinking she didn’t want to lose to me, and wanting me to watch her…”

Sumire: “Maybe that’s what we had in common. We both wanted someone specific to see our efforts - to see us as we are. As long as we have that someone watching us, we can stay strong.”

Sumire: “So I finally realized something. I think part of Kasumi’s strength came from that. …I was the one she was thinking of. I never heard her say it, but…”

Sumire: “Maybe she’d been trying to tell me through her performance. Haha… I can’t believe it took me this long to figure it out… I’m such an idiot. But I’m glad I finally realized it.”

Sumire: “Even as worthless as I am, I hope I still helped Kasumi somehow…”

Sumire: “Yes… I think so too. …Kasumi’s beyond any apologies I could give her. I can’t tell her how I feel. She’ll never see me perform. That’s reality, and it happened because of me. I’ve been running away from that for a long time.”

Sumire: “But I’m done running now. It’s time to stand on my own two feet. I want to live for both of us now. For the sake of everything we wanted. I want to grow even stronger.”

Sumire: “Even if I end up in tears from failing at a meet, or if the pressure’s too much for me sometimes… with Kasumi’s confidence, and the grace she recognized in me… I’m going to keep moving up.”

Sumire: “I’m going to show Kasumi who Sumire Yoshizawa really is.”

Sumire: “Um… and so… now that I’m committed to, you know, not running away from my feelings… I, um… th-there’s something I need to tell you, Senpai!”

newmascotresized: I missed a correct answer here: the correct answer is the third one, and I don’t know why. It seems really arbitrary. I don’t think you absolutely need this one to rank up, and even if you did we have enough free days (and/or money to pay Chihaya) that it doesn’t matter.

Sumire: “Oh! I-I’m sorry! I’m getting to it! I realized it was less a matter of showing off, and more wanting someone to watch me… that is, wanting someone special to watch me. Someone I’d want to have eyes only for me.”

Sumire: “And I thought to myself, well, for me, that special person’s obviously Senpai! So… I think that means…”

Sumire: “I’m in lo… l-l-lo… I’m in… lo…”

Sumire: “Um, but… the last thing I want to do is make you uncomfortable, so…”

newmascotresized: This is the splitting point between the romance and non-romance routes. We’ll be promptly friendzoning Sumire, and doing her Rank 10 next update.

newmascotresized: There’s not really much content left, depending on whether people want to see the last two Mementos requests or not. We have no reason to do them, but I’ll leave it up to you.

Sumire: “…! Thank you so much, Senpai. I’m glad you could be honest with me. And I’m still happy I told you how I felt. I don’t regret anything. Even if you don’t feel the same, I’ll hold onto my feelings and let them drive me forward.”

Sumire: “Oh, but please - things don’t have to be different between us now, okay? I love and admire you as a friend, too. No matter what, that won’t change. So I’d still like for you to keep your eyes on me. Even just as friends.”

Sumire: “Just watch me, and I promise I’ll keep improving!”

Sumire: “Of course! I’ll be counting on you! Ah, and you can always rely on me too. I want to help you as much as I can. Oh, it’s already this late…? I need to get to practice…”

Sumire: “Thank you so much for the coffee. Now, if you’ll excuse me…”

Sumire: “My heart is still pounding, actually. I managed to tell you how I feel… that would have been unthinkable for my past self. I really feel like I’ve matured. And I’m really glad for your part in that, Senpai.”

Sumire: “I’ll always hold onto this feeling, and I’ll use it to keep moving forward! Oh, I’ll be heading out soon. I’m about to have Coach Hiraguchi watch my performance.”

newmascotresized: We’ve got another crossword puzzle tonight, and then I’m calling it.

newmascotresized: Next time, we’ll see Sumire’s Rank 10, get the rest of the room decorations, and then hopefully get to see the scene on 2/2.

Okami still fishing minigame king.

I don’t think it’s really crucial to do those last Mementos missions you mentioned. But it technically won’t be a 100% LP if you don’t…