Part 8: Swamp Palace: Wherein Link demonstrates the superiority of cottontail over cotton.
Now, before we move on, time to tend to some things!
Three bottles of blue medicine total.
And next…
Well, this is gonna hurt…
Thankfully, the game is generous enough to give one hearts upon arrival at the end. Unfortunately, it does not replace the blue medicine I had to use.
Still, it’s worthwhile to trade it for one of the most powerful items in the game! This item gives invincibility and harms any who come close. At the cost of magic power, of course.
Round two, spikes…
Well, nearly flawless victory, at least…
Actually, let’s go ahead and fix that magic problem!
The enemies have increased in number, but not in vigilance.
This can in no way be a bad idea.
And down here, there is a random shrine.
Let’s randomly put some magic powder in it!
…You’re belligerently welcome?
Bat: But now I will get my revenge on you. Get ready for it! …Err, is that okay with you, sir?
Well, I guess so, Fluttershy.
…Ow?
Bat: Now I laugh at your misfortune! Now your magic power will drop by one half!
The bat never actually laughs, that liar.
Bat: Have a nice day! See you!
Fare thee well, bat who rolled a natural 1 on their casting roll. This “curse” does literally the opposite of the intended effect.
Anyway, one potion restocking later, back to the plot!
Yes, the dungeons are numbered, but the game, from here, actually opens up the sandbox. It just… isn’t very clear about that. Heck, the dungeons are outright numbered, so that gives a pretty clear message to the contrary. Anyway, despite the freedom, I shall be heading to the dungeons in the recommended order. Because, well, why not, really.
Well, this seems an appropriate monster placement.
That reminds me, I should remember to raise my bomb max.
And another bomb makes another hole in another random wall!
Ah, another delirious hungry traveler.
Fortunately, the exchange rate for hallucinatory fish is really high.
And then I bomb the wall and get even more money.
This seems like a pretty good time to me.
And I finish with 30 max bombs. Which I probably will not use much of at all.
Oh, hi, tree!
Ack! It sneezes bombs!
Uh, sure. Just, uh… warn if you feel a sneeze coming. Please.
Tree: I heard that using Bombs is the best way to defeat the one eyes giants. Talk about irony!
That seems like a rather… unfortunate name.
Well, I guess at least it gives me a use for all those shiny new bombs.
Anyway, back to the plot!
You too, Zelda? Is it something on my breath?
Ah, right, this.
This is entirely 100% made of logic.
Battling bugs, belligerent bouncing bubbles… brilliant!
Oh hey, a tadpole dispenser!
I think the game finds this item a bit too appealing…
things!
…What? No, that’s not a rabbit joke. It was a Hook Shot one! BOING!
Someone should combine the two. A rabbit with a built-in hook shot. For science!
♪ Duh duh-duh duh-duh, Inspector Rabbit. Duh duh-duh duh-duh duh… hoo HOO! ♫
Always check behind the waterfall.
Alright, here it is! Now we face off against…
Uh…
An eyeball with a bunch of balls of cotton floating around it.
Oh good heavens, it’s Cotton-Eye Joe!
And after deprived of its cotton, it leaps into the air, tries to land on me because it also thinks I would make a soft landing, then starting bouncing around the room. Because that sounds like a battle tactic that could not possibly…
Well, that was easy.
Maiden: Link, because of you, I can escape from the clutches of the evil monsters. Thank you!
The crystal may be a bit more problematic, though, apparently.
Maiden: …The Triforce will grant the wishes of whoever touches it, as long as that person lives…
We’re screwed if one of them wishes to be immortal.
Maiden: That is why it was hidden in the Golden Land. Only a select few knew of its location, but at some point that knowledge was lost… The person who rediscovered the Golden Land was Ganondorf the evil thief. Luckily, he couldn’t figure out how to return to the Light World…
Maiden: …Well, remember that you have magical powers, which only The Hero can make the most of!
Such as the Freeze Everything spell, the Mass Not-Quite-As-Cute-As-A-Bunny spell, and the Charm Person spell (AKA the cute bunny stare).
Maiden: Perhaps it was fate that created this form for you to live in.
No, I’m pretty sure it was Agahnim who did that. Or Ryusuta.
Maiden: Whatever the case, you must continue to find the evils hidden in the Dark World. You are the only one who can destroy Ganondorf, the thief-no, Ganon, the evil King of Darkness!
No pressure.
Maiden: May the way of the Hero lead to the Triforce.
Well, it already led to me getting a magic cane that makes me invincible, so that’s a good start. Onward!