Well, I have some good news. I found a better point list for the game, and we are on track for a max score run - 645 points is exactly where we should be going into this update. Basically, if you’re going for a max score run, do not use the guides on GameFAQs, they’re shit.
Also.. I found out today that there is no speedrun record for Gabriel Knight 3 100%. I think a fitting end to this LP will be setting that record. If you’re interested in doing co-commentary (assuming I can figure out how the hell Voicemeeter works) let me know.
It’s 10AM now, so it’s time for Gabriel to get up.
Oh, shit. And here I was thinking he put the Schattenjager talisman on her and went back to the couch. Also, it somehow does not surprise me that Gabriel Knight prefers briefs.
Grace gives the “Oh shit that’s right, I slept with Gabriel last night, WHY THE HELL DID I DO THAT?!” face.
I think what she’s implying is that Gabriel showers, when I think we all know he hasn’t seen a shower in years.
You know, you’d think it would make sense to have Mosely in on the whole geometry management thing given that two people have died already.
I went ahead and omitted the slur from the subtitles. The game takes place in 1998, so it shouldn’t be too hard to figure out what it is.
The camera deliberately stays here even after the voice line finishes to show Jean and Roxanne going into one of the rooms. This is yet another place we could miss points if we don’t hurry up.
We first want to listen in on them from outside.
You know.. maybe leaving Wilkes highly intoxicated wasn’t the best idea.
Still, I feel like the fact that they’re only NOW getting to intrigue is.. kind of bad writing. Anyway, the next thing we want to do is barge right into the room. This is another missable source of points because if we wait too long..
Roxanne will leave and close the door behind her. Meanwhile, in the real timeline where I didn’t stop to look at the point guide on my phone because alt-tabbing tends to cause the game to crash:
What we need to do is talk to Roxanne, but to do that we have to make Jean fuck off. Thankfully, he’ll do that on his own after this scene.
Roxanne will head to the storage closet, which is our next goal. Ignore the bad clipping on the sign, that just kinda happens sometimes. I think it’s because the game has two level of detail settings: one for being like three inches from the object, and one for being any further away than that.
Wait, did she just say.. yep, he’s vampire food. What’s weird is that they’d have a regular-ass vampire when there was that whole article in SIDNEY about vampires who are basically just people who drink blood to gain power.
Okay, we get it, the vampire went into his window and ate him. The question is.. why Wilkes?
Gonna skip ahead a little bit, since it’s more of Gabriel being a lying asshole.
For purposes of the speedrun, we could easily just turn around and leave. There’s no points to be had here - no prints, no evidence.
Our next stop is to Mosely’s room. I can boil what happens in here down to three shots.
Yeah. It’s totally unimportant, but it gets us points.
From this point onward, Larry’s voiceactor does something real weird. He sort of keeps the Vincent Price-sounding accent, but then also switches into a lighter Scottish accent at times. It’s not exactly Tim Curry’s legendary fake-cajun layered on fake-irish from the first game, but it’s pretty good.
Larry doesn’t actually offer us much in the way of real information, just a lot of cryptic bullshit.
He informs us that Montreaux is not a Freemason. Again, I’m cutting out extra lines. This is pretty obvious because I’m sure the Freemasons don’t allow vampires.
I still really don’t understand what Larry was hoping to accomplish by burying the manuscript in the first place.
I don’t really get how Gabriel can say this, given that he.. you know.. hasn’t read the manuscript at all except for the cover.
You know, the more I think about it, the less sense this situation makes. Larry probably has an internet connection. Even in 1998, sending a Word document isn’t going to be that taxing. Hell, he could’ve put it on a floppy disk and just hid that. There was no reason for him to even print it out!
How do you not even have a backup of it? What was your plan if it rained and the report got ruined?
I’m now realizing that this game makes even less sense than Ni no Kuni 2 did.
I’m starting to wonder if Prince James’s first name is Evan, and his middle name is Pettiwhisker Tildrum.
There’s a separate topic about the throne, but Larry will tell us nothing about it. Probably the throne of King of Underground Conspiracy Bullshit.
Again, he won’t explain what the shit the Freemasons are up to.
This is all we can really do with Larry right now. I have a strange suspicion we’re going to find him dead at some point.
Our next brief stop is at Poussin’s Tomb, where we need to talk to Emilio. He doesn’t say anything important at all, but it counts for points.
Now we need to go back to the hotel. We could go do the big obvious thing and look for Wilkes, but if we did that we’d miss out on points.
Gee, I wonder what Mosely is strolling off with under his arm. Couldn’t be, say, the bloodline report he was clearly interested in and probably just stole from Gabriel’s room. Nah.
How much do you want to bet we’re going to have to save Mosely from the vampires?
While we’re here, we can upload Larry’s print to the system. Strangely, SIDNEY doesn’t update to reflect the fact that Larry’s last name is Sinclair and that he’s Scottish, not British.
NOW we can go find Wilkes. Strangely, he’s not by L’Ermitage, which is kind of where you’d expect him to be given the probably vampire-infested tunnel underneath it. Instead, he’s at L’Homme Mort, probably because of the stupid pun.
The first thing you’ll notice coming in is a surprising number of footprints that just suddenly stop for no reason. You’ll need to examine these before going on ahead, because I think otherwise you don’t get the points for doing so.
Gabriel will automatically move on to find the body.
We then, of course, want to search it. Man, Wilkes really is starting to pixelate. It’s like all the polygons just drained right out of him.
This time, the blood and kneeprints aren’t hard to find. They’re right behind this rock. What I don’t get is why the vampires even bothered to move the body if they weren’t going to hide the bloodstain.
Here’s my best guess on this. Wilkes was the only one who knew about the tunnel - until he told Grace about it. Because he was sitting out with the seismic surveying equipment, it wouldn’t be hard to figure out that he knew about it.
Anyway, that’s over. Time to head back to the hotel. Seriously, that’s about all that happens - Gabriel looks at the body, looks at the blood, then he’s just.. done.
Buchelli will pop out of his room to look at Madeline. Humorously enough, I managed to glitch this somehow and Madeline wound up walking two circuits around the second floor before disappearing.
Our final stop is to go see Grace for a recap of the so-far almost nonexistent vampire plot.
There’s more to this dialog but it’s all stuff we already know (Grace talks about Wilkes’s map).
We can then ask about the manuscript. Grace did, in fact, read it. Some of it’s redundant: we already know what the deal with the grail is, for example. Let’s start by asking about the Bloodline.
Oh, uh.. they don’t happen to.. you know, be unicorn furries? Anyway, I googled the whole unicorn thing and it’s just something they made up for the game - I didn’t know if they had gotten it off Pierre Plantard’s bullshit train or not.
The second I heard “fertile Jesus” I started thinking about this Youtube Poop remix someone did years ago that got taken down by the Mormon church. You just can’t touch Fertile Jesus (literally and figuratively, he’s probably all sticky).
They already filed a DMCA complaint against Grace’s Geocities page where she hosts her mashups.
I wouldn’t say it shows anything so much as a unicorn and a lion both grossed out that they’re apparently involved in some kind of weird sex competition while a smaller lion on top judges, but sure.
The one other new thing we want to ask about is the throne that Larry was talking about.
One of the other topics mentions briefly that Prince James basically has the most Jesus blood in him of any of the unicorn furries.
What is she, Nathan Drake?
So yes, we are now at a point where a French Freemason is using Pierre Plantard’s dumbass hoax to become king of Europe by finding the Holy Grail and proving that he has the most Jesus in him of anyone. He’s 51% pure Jesus by volume and he’s damn well going to use it. Also vampires kidnapped his baby and I’m guessing it’s because if they kill him off, they have control of the most Jesus in the world or some dumb shit.
What I’m saying is that as incoherent as Ni no Kuni 2’s plot was, this manages to somehow be WORSE.
Suddenly, we can hear a car in the background.
Oh man. Is Gabriel finally going to get his comeuppance and be forced to ride the shitty moped?
And that’s it for this update. The new guide I found was.. a little less spaced-out than the one on GameFAQs, so I’ll be able to tell you that next time.. we’re in for more Geometry Management.
Points Breakdown:
Previous Update: 645 points
Eavesdropped on Roxanne and Jean: 2 points (647)
Busted into room to confront Roxanne and Jean: 2 points (649)
Got into Wilkes’s room: 2 points (651)
Talked to Mosely about Grace: 2 points (653)
Talked to Larry Sinclair: 6 points (659)
Talked to Emilio: 2 points (661)
Watched Mosely leave with the manuscript: 2 points (663)
Database Management: 2 points (665)
Found the footprints at L’Homme Mort: 2 points (667)
Found Wilkes’s dead body: 5 points (672)
Found the letter in Wilkes’s pocket: 2 points (674)
Found the execution site: 2 points (676)
Saw Madeline leave with the manuscript: 2 points (678)
Talked to Grace for a recap: 8 points (686)
Total: 686/965 points (71%)