The LP Turnabout: A Documentary on Japanifornian Law with Phoenix Wright

[morsrattus]

Case 2- Turnabout Sisters
Court - Part 4

When we left off…

: Ah! Oooh!
: Th-that!? Eh heh…
: I found this in Miss May’s room.

: Mr. Wright! Please explain to the court what this is!
: Miss April May?
: You were tapping the victim, Ms. Mia Fey’s phone, were you not?
: Oooh. Oooooh!

: Your Honor, This is irrelevant!

Capitalization mistake is in the source. Whoops!

: I’m not entirely sure that it is. Objection overruled. It troubles that me that our witness was in possession of a wiretap.
: This is outrageous! Does the defense truly claim that the witness was tapping her phone?
: Absolutely!
: Even if that was the case, (which it’s not) you still have to prove one thing! Did the victim ever say that the weapon was a clock on the phone?

: Here’s my proof.

Can you guess it?

: Yes, we’ve seen that.
: Listen once more to the conversation between the defendant and the victim.

: Mia! What’s up? You haven’t called in a while.
: Well, actually there’s something I want you to hold on to for me.
: Again? What’s it this time?
: It’s… a clock. It’s made to look like that statue, “The Thinker.” And it tells you the time!

: Miss April May! You used a wiretap to listen to this conversation! That’s how you knew “The Thinker” was a clock!
: Am I wrong!?
: I… I…

: Your Honor, this is ridiculous!

: The defense demands an answer.

: Witness, answer the question. Did you tap her phone?

: Miss May!

: I-it’s no fair! All of you g-ganging up on me like that… Oh, so I’m the bad girl, is that it? Is that it?

: (That did it! The court’s seen the real Miss April May now!)

: Miss May!
: What is it you little shrimp! Talk to me in that tone of voice will you!?
: You killed her, didn’t you!

: Order! There will be order!
: What? How can you possibly say that!? Are you mad?

: Oops!
: So you admit you tapped her phone!
: Heh… heh… hrrah!

: I didn’t do ANYTHING bad like murder! I’m a good girl!
: Really? Can you prove it!? (No way can she prove it!)

: But I can prove it! And I will!

: Why did you tap her phone?
: …
: Answer the question!
: Do I have to? Isn’t this a murder trial? Isn’t tippity-tapping er… irrelevant?
: (Gah! She’s saying exactly what Edgeworth wants her to say.) Miss May. You were tapping the victim’s phone!
: I hardly call that “irrelevant”!

: While this court does not condone the defense’s tone of speech, he has a point.
: Well, Miss May? Do you have an explanation for the court? Can you prove you had nothing to do with this murder, even though you tapped her phone?
: (Hah! I’d like to see her pull THAT off!)
: Mr. Lawyer, I saw that evil, evil grin! You were probably thinking “I’d like to see her pull THAT off,” weren’t you!
: (Damn… she’s good!)

Convergence.

: You can’t be serious! No way!
: Way, I say! Way! Oh, and I assure you I’m serious, Mr. Lawyer!

: Okay? So, the killing happened around 9:00 at night?
: Why, that’s just when I was getting room service from that sweet bellboy…
: R-room service!?
: Ice coffee, I believe it was?
: Ice coffee? You know? Like normal coffee, but COLD.
: If you don’t drink it quick, the ice melts and then you have… regular cold coffee.
: I-ice coffee…!?

: So, where does that leave us…?
: It is my great displeasure to inform you… That the witness appears to have been tapping the victim’s telephone.
: However! That is a separate crime, with no bearing on the current case whatsoever!
: Her testimony stands! She saw the defendant, Maya Fey, commit murder!
: (No! They’re going to let her just walk away! There’s no way I can win this unless I tie Miss May to the murder somehow…)
: Well, does the defense have anything to say?

For once we’re skipping over the other path because, simply, it is long but not very interesting - just a conversational loop in which Phoenix vacillates and eventually decides to call the bellboy because we’ll lose if we don’t.

: The defense would like to call the hotel bellboy as a witness! There’s something suspicious there, and I’m going to get to the bottom of it!
: I think you’ve sunken quite low enough already.

: I object to calling the bellboy!
: W-why? What’s your reason?
: Because I hold that the wiretapping had nothing to do with the killing!
: …!
: However… If you agree to one condition, I’ll consent to calling this witness.
: Condition…?
: If Miss April May’s alibi is not called into question after you examine the bellboy… Then you will recognize that Miss April May is not the killer, thus she is innocent!
: Therefore you must accept the verdict of “guilty” for Ms. Maya Fey! That is my condition.
: (What…!? I’d better find something suspicious in that bellboy’s testimony… Otherwise Maya will be declared “guilty” on the spot!)

This, incidentally, is roughly where the other path before would have taken us, though with slightly different dialogue.

: (Grr! I can’t accept those conditions!) Very well. The defense will refrain from calling the bellboy as a witness.
: I see. You may continue your cross-examination, Mr. Wright.
: Right. On with the cross-examination.
: What exactly do you have left to examine, Mr. Wright? Miss April May has admitted to the wiretap, yes. But that bears no relevance to the case at hand: murder! There’s no way you can prove any connection!
: (Uh oh! This can’t be the end… but I’m out of evidence!)
: Then I believe the cross-examination is over.
: Mr. Edgeworth, does the prosecution have any other witnesses to call?

: (What!? B-but that means… Maya’s guilty…!?)
: W-wait! Your Honor!
: Yes, Mr. Wright?
: The defense would like to call the bellboy after all!
: …
: Tsk tsk tsk… As I thought!
: …?
: May I remind you, dear Mr. Wright. Should you question the bellboy… and Miss April May’s alibi prove to be solid… then, by default, your client Ms. Maya Fey will be pronounced “guilty”!
: Are you prepared to accept my condition?
: (Edgeworth… He’s got me backed into a corner… But I don’t see any other way to take this!)
: I accept!

: (Alright! I’ve got nothing to lose! Except for… well, everything!)
: Understood. I accept your condition.
: Hmph.
: Fool… You fell right into my trap!
: (Uh oh!)
: Uh… um, wait…

Convergence.

: Very well! The court calls the hotel bellboy to the stand!

: I believe we’re ready for the witness to testify. He certainly does look like a bellboy.

: I received your summons in the middle of work, sir. I’m happy to be of service.
: That tea set looks rather heavy, so without further ado,
: the witness may begin his testimony.
: Very good, sir!

: I see. The defense may begin its cross-examination.
: R-right! I’m ready. (I hope…)
: (This is it… If I can’t prove Miss May was involved with the murder now… Maya will be finished!)

: What exactly is it you do at the hotel?
: Why, anything required of me, sir. I check in guests, I check out guests. I clean rooms, I make beds. I even deliver room service, sir. I checked Miss May in personally.
: Are you always so… so prim?
: Mr. Wright.
: You will refrain from asking frivolous questions…

: Are you sure it was Miss May on the phone?
: Absolutely, sir.
: H-how can you be so certain!?
: I checked Miss May in personally, sir. Not only did I see her in all her stunning radiance, but also heard her voice. And then I saw THEM, and I…

: The point being, I remembered her quite well, sir.
: Yes, what then?

: 9:00 “on the dot,” you say?
: Yes. I confirmed that detail several times. She was watching a program on the TV, and wished to drink after she finished, sir.
: (9:00… the time of the murder!)

: “Precisely” 9:00, then?
: Precisely, exactly, and most definitely, sir. 9:00 PM.
: How can you be so sure!?
: Miss May was quite insistent that it be brought then. “Oh, bellboy? Tee hee! I’d like, like, ice coffee at exactly 9:00!” Something like that, sir. Therefore, I knocked on her door at the crack of 9:00, sir.
: (Why would she be so particular about the time?)

: You are sure it was Miss April May herself?
: Ab-SO-lutely, sir.
: “Ab-SO-lutely”…?
: Yes, sir. As in, “So very absolutely,” sir. It’s an endearing mannerism of mine.
: How come you’re so very certain!?
: Well, when I brought the room service, sir… S-she… the guest, sir, favored me w-with a, um, an “embrasser,” sir.
: “Embrasser”!? Is that French for “embrace”?
: It’s French for “kiss,” sir. But not a french kiss, sir! More of a peck on the cheek.
: Wh-why would she have done that…?
: I believe, perhaps, she was momentarily swayed by my prim demeanor, sir. It was a moment I shall never, ever forget, sir.
: (Sounds pretty fish to me… I think our Miss May was up to something and wanted the bellboy to remember her!)
: …
: It’s no good! (There’s nothing there! Is… is that it?)

: Tsk tsk. Finally, you understand. This bellboy has absolutely no reason to lie! Now…
: If you have any decency, you will end this rather tedious cross-examination here!
: Hmm. It was a bit tedious. The witness may leave the stand.

: (No…! If I give up now, I lose everything… If I just give up the case, I’d be giving up the very reason I became a lawyer!)

Convergence.

: W-wait! Please wait!
: Yes? Does the defense have something to add?
: One last question… let me ask one last question!

: Your Honor, I must object. This charade of justice has gone on long enough!
: Now, now, Mr. Edgeworth. Alright Mr. Wright. I’ll give you one more question, that’s all.
: (Okay. This is really it, now. This is my last chance!)

: T-tell me about check-in! Tell me about when you checked-in Miss May.
: Oh, alright. Very well, sir. My first thought was that she was a beautiful, beautiful person. She’s just my type of girl, so it was a disappointment, really.
: I see… ? Excuse me… what exactly was a “disappointment”?
: Well, I am not without charm, sir, but even I’d have little chance with her lover there.
: (…! What did he say!?)
: What did you say!?
: Ah! Oh… er… rather, quite!
: Bellboy! Tell us the truth now…

: T-tell me again about er… room service!
: A-again, sir? At exactly 9:00, I delivered room service to Miss May in room 303. The guest had requested ice coffee… $18 was the charge, as I recall.
: I see… …?
: E-eighteen dollars? Doesn’t that seem a bit expensive?
: Y-yes, well, ice coffee for two, you know. And we don’t skimp on the ice, sir.
: (…! What did he say!?)
: What did you say!?
: Ah! Oh… er… rather, quite!
: Bellboy! Tell us the truth now…

: Bed… bed-making! Tell me about making beds that day.
: I was wondering what you were going to ask, but bed making? A new low!
: Now, now, Mr. Edgeworth.
: The witness will answer the defense’s question.
: Yes, well, it was quite like any other day’s bed making. I changed the sheets, the pillowcases, and then I proceeded to make the bed. I had to bring pillows for two, of course, but they’re quite light, you see.
: I see. Thank you. … (Pillows… for two!?)
: Bellboy! What did you just say?
: Eh!? Ah, yes, pillows are light… sir?
: Bellboy! Tell us the truth now…

Convergence.

: I object! That was… objectionable!
: … Objection overruled. The witness will answer the question.
: Er… yes, I see.
: Why did you not mention this in your testimony!?
: W-well, sir, you er… you didn’t ask!
: (Nice try!) That’s the sort of thing you’re normally supposed to mention!
: Ah, yes, quite. Indeed… It was the, er, good barrister there, Mr. Edgeworth, who…
: !
: He asked me not to mention it if I wasn’t specifically asked, sir.

: Y-you fool!

: Miss April May checked into a twin room… with a man. Correct?
: Yes, sir.
: Then, when you brought them room service, you didn’t see that man in the room…?
: That’s right, sir.
: Hmm…
: Your Honor!
: We have just learned of another person involved who may have been the murderer! In this new light, I hold that it’s impossible to judge the defendant. You agree, Mr. Edgeworth?
: Who! Who is this “other person”!

: None other than Miss April May!

: Eh!? Have you heard nothing that has transpired so far!?
: She has an alibi! She was in the hotel at the time of the murder!
: Oh… right.
: Mr. Wright!
: S-sorry, Your Honor! Give me one more chance!

: It was the bellboy and none other!
: Well, this comes as some surprise…
: Your Honor, Mr. Wright… It was the bellboy who confirmed Miss May’s alibi…
: And this in turn confirms the bellboy’s alibi! He was in the hotel!
: Well, s-sure… if you put it that way…
: I do put it that way, and I trust you will too!
: But what if they were in cahoots!
: You have evidence of this?
: Um… no, Your Honor.
: Mr. Wright!
: S-sorry, Your Honor! Give me one more chance!

: The man who checked in with Miss May!
: Oof!
: Your Honor! As has been previously revealed, Miss April May was tapping the victim’s phone. Yet Miss May herself has an alibi at the time of the murder.
: However, that does not clear the man that was with her!

[morsrattus]

: M-my, what a convenient little setup… but it’s too late…
: “Too late”? I suppose you’d like it if it was too late, wouldn’t you…
: After all, it was you who hid the presence of the other man from this court!
: Oof! Upstart… amateur…! T-these accusations are… ludicrous!

: Enough!
: The court acknowledges the defense’s argument. I expect the prosecution and defense to look into this matter fully! Am I understood?
: Yes… gasp Yes, Your Honor.
: That is all today for the trial of Maya Fey. Court is adjourned!

: You were amazing in there!
: R-really?

: Oh, I was just “doing my job” you know… heh heh.
: Then again, that other attorney was pretty cool, too…
: Huh?
: That face of his! With his eyes wide, and trembling lips!
: It sent shivers up my spine!
: Hmm… if you say so.
: So, what happens with me? Do I get to go home now?
: Well, no.

: Oh… I see.

: A “lead”?
: That man with Miss May! He’s the key!
: Oh! I get it.

: Anyway. This case is far from closed.
: Yes sir!
: I’m going to find out more about this man.
: Do you think he was the one who…?

: Sis…
: Don’t worry, I’ll find him by tomorrow. I promise.
: I’m counting on you!

: I thought it might come in handy during the trial tomorrow. But now that I have it, I’m not so sure. Most of her testimony was all lies… In fact, there’s only one part that got left on the record.

: I don’t know how much good this will do me at all, now. Anyway, time to hit the pavement and do some investigating! Maya doesn’t belong in that detention center, and it’s up to me to get her free!

Next time:: Investigation!

@Hawaii Rev. State

263-9 Dangerous flying a misdemeanor; penalty. Any aeronaut or passenger who, while in flight over a thickly inhabited area or over a public gathering within the State, engages in trick or acrobatic flying, or in any acrobatic feat, or flies, except while in landing or taking off, at such a low level as to endanger the persons on the surface beneath, or drops any object except loose water or loose sand ballast, or paper handbills, shall be guilty of a misdemeanor and punishable by a fine of not more than $1,000, or imprisonment for not more than one year, or both.

[morsrattus]

(this is filler until the next day)

[morsrattus]

(as is this)

[morsrattus]

Case 2- Turnabout Sisters
Investigation #2 - Part 1

: I didn’t expect anyone to visit me in such a dank place as this… It’s really quite… moving.
: Not! You stinking lawyer! I hope you die! Have you come to laugh? Yes, laugh at the fallen Miss May!
: No, not really, there’s something I wanted to ask.
: Unfortunately, there is nothing I want to BE asked. Haven’t you done enough questioning, you…! Spiky-head!
: (Here we go again…) Please, you’re scaring the security guard.
: …
: So? What is it you wish to ask of me, then? Hmm?
: (For starters, how did you get to be so totally whacked!?)

So, let’s get asking.

: About the man who stayed with you in your hotel room…
: …
: Can you tell me about him? Where is he? C’mon…
: No way, Jose.
: (Hmm… maybe if I had something to get her to talk…)

: Why did you place a wiretap on Mia’s phone?
: Aww, when you say it like that it sounds so… cold. So criminal.
: Um… tapping people’s phones is a crime, Miss May.
: Oh, and I suppose you learned that in Lawyer School, hmm? Creep!
: (This woman is impossible to talk to…)

: Say… Why are you so… angry? I mean, you don’t look like a bad person…
: Ooh, that does it! Bottom-feeding, scum-sucking lawyer!
: B-bottom…? (I can’t tell, does she have a thing against lawyers… or just against me?)

Even the badge does nothing useful!

: Hey, guess what. Actually, I, um, really hate your guts. So get lost. Because, well, I’m not cooperating.
: (Thanks, I noticed.)

So, we move on.

: Looks like forensics is taking the day off today. Detective Gumshoe’s nowhere in sight. The police really gave this place a working over. I doubt there are any valuable clues left. Suppose it can’t hurt to take a look around, though.

Not that there’s much to see.

: Mia’s favorite potted plant. I guess I’ll have to water it now…

: You couldn’t cram more legal books in here, even if you wanted to. All the cases that the chief worked on are filed here. Hmm. Are some of the files missing…? Nah, I’m imagining things.

So, let’s head out.

: Quite the performance today, if I dare say so myself.
: Oh, um, thanks. Sorry for putting you on the spot like that.
: No, no, not at all, sir! Your efforts today can only help the Gatewater’s “rep,” as they say.
: Huh? “Rep”?
: Yes! Our reputation will swell as the hotel where the murderer used a wiretap! We can charge a premium for the roo, of course. It will be great for business, sir!
: Whoa, whoa! Miss May hasn’t been charged with murder.
: I, too, will become famous! “The Bellboy who brought the murderer ice coffee”…!
: (Why do I feel like we’re both stuck in the same bad dream…)
: So! You are our honored guest. Please let me know if there is anything I can bring you!

: Nice weather again today. I can see the Fey & Co. Law Offices, of course.
: Ah, yes. We plan to install a telescope in that window, of course. Just $5.00 will earn you three minutes of a “view to a kill”!
: …
: J-just kidding, sir. Oh hoh hoh hoh!
: (By that look in his eyes I’d say he was more than serious…)

: A bottle and two glasses rest on the table. Why hasn’t he cleaned these up by now?
: Ah, I beg your pardon, sir, but if you could please refrain from touching those… It’s part of the decor. I call it: “The last drink… before murder!” We’ll be famous! The talk of the hotel industry!

: Huh? There’s still a screwdriver stuck in that drawer!
: Ah, please leave that as it is, sir. That’s the “Drawer of Terror, Hiding Place ot the Murderer’s Wiretap.” It’s set to become one of the most popular attractions here.
: (This guy’s serious! I don’t believe it…)

Now, to chat him up.

: About Miss May…
: Oh, her? Sir, not to boast but I knew the moment I saw her… “She’d do it!” I said!
: (Do WHAT!? I’m starting to think the most suspicious person here is this guy!)

: I wanted to ask you about the man who was with Miss May…?
: Ah, yes… He struck me as a real “Lady Killer,” if you’ll pardon the expression. I knew it from the moment I saw him, sir. He and I are of the same ilk. We both carry the scent of… danger.
: (There we are in total agreement, Mr. Psycho Bellboy.)
: If you had a photo of that man, I’m quite sure I could identify him.
: (A photo. Hmm…)

: Could you tell me about this hotel?
: Absolutely! And on that subject, I have an excellent idea, sir! Currently, this hotel is known as the “Gatewater.” I propose that we add a subtitle!
: A subtitle!?

: Well? What do you think?
: Um… sounds great! (Whatever floats your tea set…)

And, naturally, we present the badge.

: I’m sorry… All I could think about during the trial was the hotel… I wasn’t paying much attention to the evidence.

Time to move on, for now.

: (Huh. Looks like Grossberg is out today… again. Maybe he’s avoiding me for some reason?)

Well, we can at least look around.

: Wait a second… Wasn’t there a giant painting hanging on that wall…?

The choice here doesn’t matter.

: Wasn’t it? It wasn’t a very memorable painting, anyhow.

: What’s this? Old photos? There are two lying here. Something’s been written in pencil on the backs. “DL-6 Incident - Exhibit A,” “DL-6 Incident - Exhibit B”…

: I’m sure I’ve seen this person somewhere… Perhaps I’ll borrow this photo. I’m sure no one will miss just one little photo. And it might be a valuable clue… I’ll take it for now.

Maybe this photo is what we need!

: Hey, the only reason I’m back here is because YOU won’t talk to me!
: Oh, so it’s MY fault now? You don’t just have spiky hair, you also have a spiky heart!
: (That does it. When this case is done I’m shaving my head.)

When we present the photo…

: … Who’s that? Your mother?
: (… sigh Looks like I’ve just been wasting my time.)

No good.

: About the man who stayed with you in your hotel room… Can you tell me about him? Where is he?
: I’m not telling!
: Look, he’s being accused of murder! I don’t think you want to be protecting him.
: Hmm. Would you have sold out the late Ms. Fey to the cops?
: No.
: See?
: (Damn! Hmm… maybe if I had something to get her to talk…)

Maybe the bellboy knows something. Certainly we can try showing him the photo.

: Well, it’s a fine photo, sir. However, the person Miss May was accompanied by was, well, a man.
: (Oh… yeah. Right.)

Okay, maybe we took the wrong photo.

: I think I’ll swap them…

Let’s try this again.

We present the new photo…

: Look, I’ve said several times, I’m not telling you…
: ! Where did you…?
: (Ah hah! A reaction!) This is him, isn’t it?
: What? Who? When? Why…?
: It IS him. This is the man who stayed in your hotel room the night of the murder!
: No! No, that’s not right.
: (Nice try, Miss Cooperative.)
: D-do you have proof that was him? Hmm? Y-yeah! Proof! Show me proof!
: (I’m so close!)

We’re on the right track, but we need a bit more.

: … That’s him, Detective.

: Um… I’m the lawyer.
: Oh, I know that! I just wanted to say “Detective” once. You know how it is.
: (No. No I don’t.)
: Without a doubt, that is the man who checked in with Miss April May. How about I write an affidavit swearing that that’s him!

: Well, sure. Why not?
: Yes! I’ve always wanted to write an affidavit, sir. From hence forth I will be known as the “bellboy who swore the affidavit”!
: Just hurry up and write it.

: (Not even Miss May can play dumb to this!)

Now we can present the affidavit.

: What’s that?
: The bellboy’s affidavit! He told us everything he saw. He told us about the man you checked in with.

: …!

: (Okay, okay… she’s vulnerable now. I should be gentle.) Miss May… It would be easy for me to hand this affidavit to the police.
: …
: If they get involved, wouldn’t your boss be even more… er… inconvenienced? All I want to do is have a little chat with him. You won’t tell me?
: …
: Is that all you have to say?
: Yes.
: If it’s so easy for you to “get the police involved,” then why don’t you? Somehow I think you’re not up to it, hmm?
: (Show them a little kindness and they jump all over you! That had the opposite effect to what I hoped…)
: Aww. smirk Poor little lawyer… And you were so close!
: (This isn’t working… I think I’ve worn out this piece of paper’s usefulness.) Dammit!

: (Why did April May not want to talk about it… she must know him!)

: You’re wasting your time!
: Miss May’s lips are sealed!

And from here, we’d need to go and talk to Grossberg and find another way to identify the guy. But we didn’t do that.

: (This is it, all or nothing! Time to do a little bluff.) No use playing dumb! (If, indeed, that’s an act.)

: Whaaaaat!?
: Even though he should be a witness to murder, this man is in hiding. I’m sure the press would have a field day with his reputation!
: …! Ooooh! Fine! I’ll talk! You… you win, Lawyer.
: (Yes! Man, that felt good! It’s great to be alive!)
: Why are you pumping your fists in the air?
: cough Now, tell me about the man you were with.

: Redd White, the president of the information gathering conglomerate, Bluecorp.
: (Redd… White?) “Information gathering?”
: Well… I suppose you could call them a detective agency.
: Hmm… So this is the man that was with you the night of the murder?
: … I’m… I’m scared to talk. I don’t want to end up like her!
: i[/i] It’s okay, I’ll just ask Mr. White himself. Can you tell me where Bluecorp is located?
: …

: (Finally, a lead on this guy!)

: Time to take action!

Next time: Bluecorp!

[quote="Idaho Code Ann. Section 18-5003]CANNIBALISM DEFINED - PUNISHMENT
(1) Any person who wilfully ingests the flesh or blood of a human being is guilty of cannibalism.
(2) It shall be an affirmative defense to a violation of the provisions of this section that the action was taken under extreme life-threatening conditions as the only apparent means of survival.
(3) Cannibalism is punishable by imprisonment in the state prison not exceeding fourteen (14) years.[/quote]

[morsrattus]

Case 2- Turnabout Sisters
Investigation #2 - Part 2

So, we’re off to Bluecorp today.

: … (What’s with the surreal decor…?)

: (What the…?)

: I was just inquirably asking the title that you go by.
: Uh… Wright. Phoenix Wright. i[/i]
: Mr. Wright, is it? Right, I see… Splendiferous. Perhaps I have intimidated you with my giantesque vocabulary…?
: (What is this guy’s problem!)
: I’m Redd White, CEO of Bluecorp. You know, Corporate Expansion Official? My business dealings bring me into contact with the elite of the elite.

: (What a fruitcake!)
: Hmmm, let me guess… You are an attorney fresh out of law school, are you not? That’s the only explanation for why you would come to meet me like this!
: (What does he mean by that?)
: No matter. So, what business does a “mighty” lawyer have with a man such as myself?
: (Yipes! This guy’s arrogance meter is off the scale!)

Let’s take a look around.

: …? Haven’t I seen this somewhere…? Is this a replica?
: Ridiculosity! I have no interest in anything but originals. That right there is a bona fide original! Worth five million, for sure.
: Hmmm…

: An impressive line-up of trophies. “Judges Special Runner-up” “Best Participation” “Judges Cooperation Award” “Special Good Try PRize” Hmm. The words “Judges” and “Special” kind of stand out.

: A statue of a man holding up the world. The “Bluecorp” sign certainly stands out enough… The model for the man is, of course, Mr. White.
: Truly a work of art! But, probably too beautacious for you to appreciate, correct?
: (I think it’s a little too “beautacious” for just about anyone to appreciate.)

: I’m guessing this is supposed to be a desk? My my… This is quite the… thing.
: It is modeled on my body, see? Well? Does its sleek roundature not… inspire you?

: This is the top floor of a 20-story building. The view is quite… presidential.

Time for a chat.

: Miss May is an employee of Bluecorp, is she not?
: Correct. She was my secretariat.
: What a shock it was to hear what she has done!
: “What she has done”… You mean the wiretap?
: Indeed! She is paid to answer phones. Tapping them is NOT in her job description. She does gather information for us as part of her duties.
: But, I assure you, we do not condone illegal methods! It is ineffable that she would do this.
: (It sounds like he’s trying to turn Miss May into a scapegoat…)

: On the night of the murder were you in April May’s hotel room?
: Who can say? I seldom pay attention to mundane details such as time and place.
: My motto is: “Don’t worry, be happy!”
: Still, Mr. White… The hotel bellboy has stated on the record that he does remember you very clearly.
: …
: No matter! The bellboy can say what he pleases. I still won’t talk to you. If you want me to speak, put me on the witness stand!
: Although I doubt you’d be capable of doing that.
: (Hmm. He raises a good question, actually… Why didn’t prosecution call him as a witness? He should have “seen” the same thing as April May!)
: Oh hoh hoh. The police… the courts… To me they are mere toys. Playthings for my amusement!

: What kind of company is Bluecorp, anyway?
: Ah, excellent question! We buy and sell various kinds of information. We are a company of the future! You might say, we ARE the future!
: (Sell… information?)
: In just 10 years, I’ve built this business up into the grand office you see now. Ah, in case you were wondering, Bluecorp was named after the color “blue”!
: I, Redd White of Bluecorp, as founder and CEO, named it so! And why, you ask? Because I like the color blue of course!
: Fantabulistic, is it not?

: Uh… there’s something that’s been bothering me.
: Yes? What might that be?

: It’s a very striking piece of art.
: Magnificentatious, isn’t it?
: Yeah. … (Why am I making small talk…?)

: You know, I’ve actually seen that painting before.
: Oh?
: Just yesterday, actually.
: Your point being…?
: My point is simple. Er, rather, my question is simple: Why is that painting hanging on your wall?

: Say, when did you get that painting?
: … Hmm… no idea! I forgot!
: I’ve seen that painting before. Yesterday, in fact. Why do I find that painting here today?

The two above options converge here.

: … Mr. Wrong, was it?
: Wright.
: It appears you do not fully grasp your position here.
: I ask again. Who are you?
: Umm… huh? A lawyer?
: No, my feeble friend, A “mere” lawyer. Worth nothing. Zilch. Zippo. Nada!
: Just like that sorry excuse for an attorney, Grodyburger!
: i[/i]

: Well, Mr. Lawyer. What will you do, eh? Charge me with assault?
: Charge away, I welcome it! For it is YOU who will be found guilty!
: What…?
: Heed my exposition! The police, the courts, they all do my bidding.
: (So you say… But I wonder… Is that kind of control really possible?)
: I don’t expect you to understand. It is a world beyond your compensation. … You came here from Grodyburger’s, I presume?
: Mr. Grossberg’s… yes.
: Then you must ask him: Why is it that this painting of his hangs here? Perhaps then he will tell you?
: Perhaps he will explain how a man can live life purely for personal profit! …
: Go now! Skedaddle! there is nothing more to discuss!

He’s right about that, at least.

: … …
: (Huh? I don’t think he’s noticed me standing here. Maybe I should… clear my throat?) Aaa-HHHEM!
: Jumping Jehosephats! Oh! You!
: What’s wrong? You looked so pensive… like an old man at the end of his days.
: Hmm? I’m not senile yet! I was just thinking about this whole mess…
: (Something’s really bothering him, that much is clear.)

Let’s see what Grossberg has to talk about.

: So you came to see the trial?
: Yes, yes I did. Something was bothering me all last night, you see, couldn’t get a wink of sleep.
: Really? What was that?
: Well, you see, it’s just… Mia’s sister, that poor girl.
: My boy, I owe you my thanks, truly. I don’t know what I would have done if things had gone poorly for the girl.

: I asked before, but, why did you refuse her request for defense? I think I have a right to know.
: A right, Mr. Wright? No, no, I’m sorry. It’s just, I need more time to think about it, my boy.
: … (He does seem troubled about something… I’m starting to have a feeling I know what it is.)

: So, I paid Bluecorp a visit.
: Oh? Oh, I see.
: Mr. Grossberg… I have to admit, something has been bothering me.
: Oh? What is it? Well, out with it, my boy!

: Mr. Grossberg, sir… There was a giant painting hanging right there the other day, was there not? The one you said you had “no intention of parting with”? Well, I saw it. Today. It was in the CEO’s office at Bluecorp. Redd White’s office.
: … So… you noticed. I suppose I should have guessed you would. It is a large painting…
: Mr. Grossberg, I know you and Mr. White are connected somehow!
: C-connected, you say?

: You’re his client, aren’t you? He’s giving you information!
: What’s that now?
: You’ve been protecting him all along. You protect him because you need his services!
: …
: You gave him that painting in exchange for some valuable information, didn’t you?
: Utterly ridiculous. Me, his client? I would never willingly deal with that man. Never!
: (Huh? Did I get it wrong?)

: Mr. White has something on you doesn’t he? Blackmail?
: …!
: I think that painting is fairly gaudy proof.
: … Very well. This may be the chance I’ve been waiting for. Maybe it’s time to get this off my chest, so I can finally rest easy again. After all, you were Mia’s understudy. Perhaps it was fate?
: (What’s he talking about…?)

: It’s not something I can claim to understand… But you and Mr. White are lovers, aren’t you!
: W-w-what! My boy!
: You sent that painting to him! As a sign! A sign of undying love!
: M-m-my boy, please! You’re letting your fancies run away with you! Where do you get these bizarre ideas?
: I… I don’t understand how you could…
: That’s because I’m not, we’re not… Don’t be ridiculous! …
: Enough. I’ll swallow my pride and tell you all.
: (I knew it! They are lovers!)
: N-no! We are NOT lovers!

: That photo of Mr. White… Why would you have his photo, Mr. Grossberg?
: Umm… yes, well. It’s been a long time since then…
: A long time ago? I’m sorry… but I think not. I think you still have ties to Mr. White, even today.
: R-really! Whatever gave you that idea! W-what connection could I possibly have to an individual such as he?

: You go drinking together! You’re friends, aren’t you?
: … Now you’re being foolish, my boy. Why in the world would I ever drink with the likes of him!?
: (Huh? Whoops… maybe that wasn’t it.)

: Mr. White has something on you doesn’t he? Blackmail?
: …! I don’t… I don’t know what you’re talking about!
: Mr. Grossberg, sir… There was a giant painting hanging right there the other day, was there not? The one you said you ahd “no intention of parting with”? Well, I saw it. Today. It was in the CEO’s office at Bluecorp. Redd White’s office.
: …
: So… you noticed. I suppose I should have guessed you would. It is a large painting…
: Mr. Grossberg… tell me what happened.

: Redd White is supplying you with information, obviously!
: What’s that now?
: You’ve been protecting him all along. You protect him because you need his services!
: … Now you’re being foolish, my boy. What possible use could I have for the services of the likes of him!?
: (Huh? Whoops… maybe that wasn’t it.)

: I thought it was strange. Here was Maya, your own apprentice’s little sister, in desperate need… Accused of killing her own sister no less, and you wouldn’t take the case! I finally realized why.

: I’ll bet you and White go way back! He’s your boss now, and was before, I bet!
: My what? Boss? Are you serious?
: Yeah! you both have that sort of “we’re in the same club together” feel to you.
: Please, stop. You have a very peculiar sense of humor, Mr. Wright. Very well, I’ll talk.
: (What does he mean… “sense of humor”? I was serious!)

: Mr. White has something on you doesn’t he? Blackmail?
: …! I don’t… I don’t know what you’re talking about!
: Mr. Grossberg, sir… There was a giant painting hanging right there the other day, was there not? The one you said you ahd “no intention of parting with”? Well, I saw it. Today. It was in the CEO’s office at Bluecorp. Redd White’s office.
: …
: So… you noticed. I suppose I should have guessed you would. It is a large painting…
: Mr. Grossberg… tell me what happened.

: It’s not something I can claim to understand… But you and Mr. White are lovers, aren’t you!
: W-w-what! My boy!
: Mr. Grossberg. The other day, there was a giant painting hanging on that wall. I saw that painting again, today. It was in the CEO’s office of Bluecorp. It was a present, wasn’t it?
: Well, my boy, you have a splended imagination!
: I… I don’t understand how you could…
: That’s because I’m not, we’re not… Don’t be ridiculous!
: (Hmm… I guess I was wrong. But it just seemed so right!)

And all of that, eventually, converges here.

: Redd White is a man who makes his living through intimidation. Bluecorp is a company that excels in finding people’s weaknesses, I’m afraid. I’ve been paying them for 15 years now…

: (15 years…!)
: All because of the “DL-6 Incident,” as you may have guessed.
: (The name on the back of those photographs!)
: As you suspected, I could not stand in defense of Maya because of this. White would have destroyed me if I did.
: (So that’s the connection!)
: It is hard for me to tell you this, my boy. But arresting Redd White will be nigh on impossible.
: Impossible? Why!?
: He has information on everyone. It gives him an iron grip! He owns judges, attorneys, prosecutors, police… and politicians.
: What!?
: They are bound, unable to do harm to themselves, and therefore, to him. Don’t look at me like that. What you see is nothing more than the weight of many years.

: What is the “DL-6 Incident”?
: “DL-6” is nothing more than the sorting code the police gave the case. It was 15 years ago now… I received a request from a medium. A spirit medium.
: (A medium…?)
: Her name was Misty Fey.
: i[/i]
: Indeed. She was Mia’s mother. She had been investigating a murder at the bequest of the police. And… she failed. As a result, the police called her a fraud.
: (This is what Maya was talking about the other day!)
: I did all I could for her, and in the end, cleared her of wrongdoing. That murder case, however remains unsolved to this day. That case, is the DL-6 Incident.

: But why were you blackmailed over this, Mr. Grossberg?
: The DL-6 Incident was top-secret at the time. It made sense. The police didn’t want people to know they were using a medium! They couldn’t let people know. But one person found out.
: I… I told him.
: You told White?
: He offered me riches… It is an embarrassment to me now. Because I talked, the police were mocked far and wide. In secret, they began looking for the one who sold them out. Of course White heard about it, and he came to me. Only this time, the offer was blackmail.
: … I see.
: … White controls the law of this country as he sees fit. Yet if you would still challenge him… Have a close look at Mia’s office.
: Mia’s office…?
: She followed his every move for years. She may have recorded something of what she found.

That’s a good idea.

: Hard to imagine a murder took place here. Mr. Grossberg said there would be clues… Maybe I should have another look.

: All the cases the chief ever worked on are filed here. They’re in alphabetical order. Let’s take a look…

: Let’s see if there’s “A” recordi n this file that catches my “I.” “A”… “B”… “F”! “Misty Fey.” That’s Mia and Maya’s mother.

: “‘I have tarnished the Fey name.’ Leaving only these words, my mother vanished. I was determined to find the ones who had made my mother blame herself in this way. Using the E.S.P. that runs in my family, I held an audience with the dead. Finally, the names of two men surfaced. One was Marvin Grossberg, a lawyer who sold my mother’s information for riches. The other was the man who sold that information to the press. This parasite, who makes his fortune on threats and coercion… His name is…”
: Hmm. The record stops there. … So Mia knew Grossberg…

: Let’s see… “J” through “S”… Nothing much in here.

: sigh Well, no harm in flipping through a bit, I guess… The biggest part’s here at the end in “S”… “Suicide”? Eww… She has a collection of suicide reports. There’s politicians… policemen… … …! There’s writing on most of these in pencil. “White”…? This is Mia’s handwriting. Wait, I get it! Mia thought he was involved in these “suicides”! White drove them all to…

: … I can use these newspaper clippings. Hmm… let’s find the most disturbing one…

: “T”… “U”… I know, “W”! “White”! … ! The entire “W” section is missing! Was it taken…?

: Sorry, but there’s something I have to ask you.
: Mr. Lawyer, I really hate having to repeat myself…
: But it seems the message has not yet penetrated your thick skull… Stop bothering me!
: If you try my patience further, I fear a nasty accident may occur. Do I make myself clear?
: i[/i]

: (This is the onlky clue that Mia left me… I’d better make this one count!) Mr. White… see this?

: …
: He was embezzling secret government funds. Then, one day, word get leaked to the press. The very next day he took his own life.
: And this concerns me how…?
: I found this article in Mia’s office.
: Miss Mia…?
: She had a file filled with articlesl ike this. Every one of them was labeled with a single word… “White.”
: …!

: You bribed him!
: B-bribed!? …
: What exactly has led you to say this?
: (Um… gee, that’s a good question. I guess I got ahead of myself there…)
: Hmph. You certainly have an active imagination.
: i[/i]

[morsrattus]

: You were spying on him, weren’t you?
: “Spying”…?
: You snooped on him, and found out about the embezzlement. Then, when you revealed it, he was driven to suicide!
: Mr. Lawyer. I know nothing of this. And, even in the highly unlikely event that I did do such a thing…
: All I would have done is provide “information.” That is not a crime in this country.
: (Gah! This guy’s as cool as a cucumber…!)

: You were blackmailing him!
: Blackmail?
: Not just him, either. You were threatening and coercing hundreds of others! You were involved in all of the suicide cases that Mia investigated! This company is built on blackmail! I’m right, aren’t I?
: What a bizarre accusation. Mr. Wrong…
: What is it that you should be doing now? Investigating me?
: No no no. I think not!
: You should be searching for the one who killed Miss Mia!

: Mr. Wrong will be leaving now.

: You are absolutely right. I should be looking for the killer now. And actually, I’ve done better. I’ve found him. He’s sitting right in front of me.

: You’re wrong, Mr. White.
: Excuse me?
: What I should be doign now is going after you!

Convergence.

: Just what are you insinuating?
: Mia was on to you. She was keeping tabs. For this reason you had April May tapping her phone. Then, Mia was murdered, and all the documents about you mysteriously disappeared. So, the culprit would be…?
: …
: Even a child could work it out, Mr. White. You did it!
: …

: We won’t be needing an escort for Mr. Wrong. Instead, please conncet me to the public prosecutor’s office.

: Hello. Chief Prosecutor? I’ve changed my mind. I want to testify tomorrow.
: What’s this about?
: The Mia Fey case. I witnessed the murder, you see.
: And, thus, as a very important witness, I would like to testify.
: What? Why now? I thought you said you didn’t want to go to court?
: Quietude…! I told you I changed my mind, didn’t I? Oh, and one other thing. Send the police over here right away.
: The man is standing right in front of me. He looks dazed but could be violent!
: What? What man?
: Are you even listening?

: What!?
: Mr. White… this isn’t another one of those…
: Chief Prosecutor.
: I do not believe you are in a position to freely offer your opinions to me, correct?
: I’m telling you to send the police, now!

: … Did I not tell you, Mr. Wrong? You are a mere lawyer!
: As was Miss Mia.
: How dare you!
: I’ll point the finger at you, and you will be tried as Miss Mia’s killer! The case is as good as settled. No lawyer of any worth will defend you. I have friends in the local lawyer’s association, you see.
: You’ll be given a lawyer so stupendously inept that they make even you look competent.
: (I… I feel faint.)

: Aaa! Butz! Hairy Butz!
: Wright, actually. Phoenix Wright. And my friend’s name is “Larry”…
: Oh, right! Sorry, pal. Butz was that murderer, right?
: Detective Gumshoe.
: I present to you, the man who killed Miss Mia Fey!
: W-what!?
: Take this despicable human being into custody. …
: Farewell, Mr. Wrong!

: My trial begins tomorrow. White’s going to set a trap for me. And the prosecution will be in on it, of course. Edgeworth, included. An attorney was assigned to me by the state, yesterday. I refused. I had an idea.

: Wright! Mr. Wright!

: Great, they let you out of detention.
: Just now, yes. It’s all thanks to you!
: Hah. Now I’m afraid we’ve switched places.
: What? You mean, you…?

: …

: How many people does that man need to destroy before he’s satisfied!? My mother… My sister… And now you!
: This has gone too far! Mr. Wright, please tell me, is there anything I can do?

: Alright, you can be my defense lawyer tomorrow!
: Alright!
: Huh?
: Leave it to me! I am Mia’s sister, after all! Lawyership runs in our blood!
: (Wasn’t it E.S.P. that ran in your blood…?)
: I’d better run to the bookstore and pick up a copy of “Law for Rookies.”

: Well, you could cheer for me in court.
: Cheer for you? You mean… like a cheerleader?
: Huh? Um, yeah, like that.
: Alright! Leave it to me!
: Huh?
: I’d better go get a uniform and some pom-poms…!

: Right. Okay, listen up. I want you to help me break out of here!
: You mean… a jail break?
: Yeah. Tonight’s our only chance!
: Alright!
: Huh?
: Oh, I’d better go get a hacksaw while the stores are still open. Oh, oh! And a rope ladder, and a getaway car! Can you drive?

Convergence.

: W-wait. Wait wait wait.

: I’m kidding! It was a joke!
: No way!
: No really, I was kidding. But thanks. It’s good to know you’re on my side. (And there really isn’t anything you can do for me anyway…)
: But… but I can’t just sit here and do nothing!
: I’ve got to give that man a piece of my mind!
: (Just a piece…?) Okay. Then, come to the court tomorrow.
: O-okay! I’ll be there!
: I’ll show them a thing or two!

: In fact, it’s gotten worse. Lengthy court preceedings are no longer realistic. Beginning a few years ago, a limit of three days was put on initial court trials. Almost all finish in a day. Most with a guilty verdity. I never thought I would end up in the defendant’s chair myself.

: This is it! It’s me or him!

Next time: Phoenix Wright on Trial.

[quote=255 Illinois Comp. Stat. Section 605/18.1]The notice regarding safe reptile-handling practices [shall contain] all of the following statements:
(A) “As with many other animals, reptiles carry salmonella bacteria, which can make people sick. Safe reptile-handling steps should be taken to reduce the chance of infection.”
(B) “Always wish your hands thoroughly after you handle your pet reptile, its food, and anything it has touched.”
© “Keep your pet reptile and its equipment out of the kitchen or any area where food is prepared. Kitchen sinks should not be used to bathe reptiles or wash their dishes, cages, or aquariums. If a bathtub is used for these purposes, it should be cleaned thoroughly and disinfected with bleach.”
(D) “Don’t nuzzle or kiss your pet reptile.”
(E) “Keep reptiles out of homes where there are children under 5 years of age or people with weakened immune systems…”
(F) “Pet reptiles should not be allowed in child care centers.”
(G) “Pet reptiles should not be allowed to roam freely throughout the home or living area.”[/quote]

[morsrattus]

(filler to next day)

[morsrattus]

(more filler)

[morsrattus]

Case 2- Turnabout Sisters
Trial #2 - Part 1

: Yeah. One way or another, this case gets decided today.
: Aaa! Ph-Phoenix! Look!

: (Prosecutor… Edgeworth.)
: I received a call from the public prosecutor’s office yesterday.
: ?

: If I raise an objection, I have it on good faith that the judge will listen to me.
: (What, does White have the judge in his pocket, too!?) So… you’re saying I’m going to be guilty. End of story?
: … I will do anything to get my verdict, Mr. Wright. Anything.
: Why… Why!? How can you torment an innocent person like this!?

: How can we know that? The guilty will always lie, to avoid being found out.
: There’s no way to tell who is guilty and who is innocent! All that I can hope to do is get every defendant declared “guilty”!
: So I make that my policy.
: Edgeworth… You’ve changed.
: Hmm? Phoenix! You know him!?
: Don’t expect any special treatment, Phoenix Wright.

: Well… court will be opening for session soon.
: What? But wait!
: Your defense attorney isn’t even here yet! He’s not…
: I’ll be defending myself.

: Okay, let’s do this.

: The court is now in session for the trial of Mr. Phoenix Wright.
: The prosecution is ready, Your Honor.
: The defense is ready, Your Honor.
: Mr. Wright… Are you sure you’re up to doing this?
: Yes, Your Honor. I will be defending myself.
: Understood.
: Very well. Mr. Edgeworth, your opening statement, please.
: As the details of the event are already quite clear to the court, today we will hear the testimony of another witness to the defendant’s crime.
: I see. The prosecution may call its witness.
: (That went far too smoothly!)
: (Why didn’t the judge ask Edgeworth why his witness didn’t testify before!? It’s like… it’s like he already knows why!)

: Mr. Edgeworth, you owe an explanation to the court! Why didn’t this witness testify in the trial against Ms. Maya Fey!?
: Hmph. I’m ever so sorry! Mr. White is a busy man, and besides… at the time, I thought that Ms. May’s opinion was all that would be needed. Again, my sincerest apologies to the court.
: Excellent, Mr. Edgeworth. I appreciate your demeanor.

: (Great. He gets to show off and I get nowhere.)

: (Forget it. I smell a trap.)

Convergence.

: I would like to call Mr. Redd White to the stand.

: Please state your full name.
: You wish to know the title of my personage?

: Er… your name?
: Yes! That is what I said! Oh dear, do my locutions confuse?

: (These two are great together…)
: My name is Redd White. But my friends call me Blanco Nino. I am the CEO, or to use a more common term, the President, of Bluecorp.
: Did you know the victim, Ms. Mia Fey?

: … You were at the Gatewater Hotel the night of the murder?
: Correct.
: And you witnessed the murder from there?
: Ahem. Why tell you what you already know?
: Very well, Mr. White. You may begin your testimony.
: (If I can’t rip this guy’s testimony apart, I’m done for.)
: (Why do I always feel like it’s the end of the world and I’m the last man standing?)
: Ho hoh hoh.

: I hope you have made your peace with God, Mr. Lawyer!
: …!

: Hmm…
: If things occurred as you testify, then I’m afraid the defendant is guilty.
: Very well, defendant… er, I mean, Mr. Wright.
: Your cross-examination…
: Yes, Your Honor.

: How do you know what time it was?
: Because I am always abso-posi-lutely perfect, you know?
: No no no, you’re not getting away with that!
: You are so mistrusting, Mr. Lawyer! So… what was the proper term for “secretary” again…?

: It happened soon after the room service arrived.

: True, the bellboy who brought the coffee saw Miss May.
: But he testified that he did not see you at the time!
: Ahem. This is your concern?

: i[/i]
: Tell us, what were you doing at that time?

: By window, you mean the one directly across from the Fey & Co. Law Office?
: Correct! That is the only window, you see.
: And there you were reading… papers?
: Correct!
: The Gatewater is a businessman’s hotel, and I am a busy man who had business to do!

: A “bedlam”?
: It must have been when you attacked, I assume.
: We see. Continue.

: So you were reading your papers until you heard that sound?
: But of course. I am no snoop, peeping out of windows at night.
: (No snoop? Yeah, right! You’ve made a career out of snooping!)

: S-spiky-haired!?

: What you just said directly conflicts with Miss May’s testimony! Miss May clearly stated that the assailant looked like a “girl”!

: Just what is your eyesight?

: Counting both eyes… 40!
: 40!? Don’t add them together!
: I think the witness is trying to say his eyesight is good.
: (Hey, whose side is the judge on, anyway?)
: And what did you do then?

: What was Miss May doing at that time?
: She had just finished watching a soap opera on the TV, and was weeping openly.
: Did you know she had been tapping the Fey office phone?

: Irrelevant! That has nothing to do with the case at hand!

: Miss May was acting alone when she tapped the phone of this Fey woman.
: You’d make a good politician, Mr. White.
: Ho hoh! After all, I am “El Presidente.”
: Please continue.

: Can you be a little more detailed about that? I think it’s worth knowing exactly what happened.
: Of course! Comprende! I understand!

: You gave chase, and struck her down!
: Are you sure?

: As you know, I am always abso-posi-lutely perfect!
: Perhaps you could change your testimony to reflect this new detail.

: Are you sure about that?
: How many times must I say it?

: I am abso-posi-lutely perfect! End of story!
: (How many times must I hear that?)

: Doesn’t something about that strike you as a little odd?

: Um… “impaction”? Don’t you mean just “impact”?
: Ridiculosity! I think you need to brush up on your language skills!
: (On second thought, perhaps I’d better leave the whole language thing alone…)

And we loop.

: (Did Edgeworth “prep” this guy, too, I wonder? Anyway, I’d better find a weakness in there…)

Have you spotted it?

: Wait right there! Mr. White, you’ve dug your own grave!
: What is this!?

: But that directly contradicts Miss May’s testimony!

: …! Oh hoh hoh. It is simple. You have misheard her.
: I think not. Look at the floor plans…

: She would have been running directly away from the door! She would have been running into a dead end! Don’t you find that odd?

: I did see her run to the left… I did.
: Phoenix… look at his face. I don’t think he’s lying about this one.

: (Maybe he really did see the victim run left…? So he did witness the killing…? Wait a second!)
: Mr. Wright?
: Yes, Your Honor?
: Miss May says “right,” and Mr. White says “left.”

: As Mr. White has testified, Mia ran to the left.
: But… But if that’s the case…
: Why would she run in the opposite direction from the door?
: She did not. She was running towards the door, Your Honor.
: Bwah! Now you’re the one making a contradiction, Mr. Wright!
: Not at all.

: As Miss May has stated, Mia ran to the right after she was attacked.
: What is this? I am not fashioning fabrications, I assure you! That lady ran to the left! I am sure of it!
: Then there can be only one explanation.
: Eh…? And that is?

: Both witnesses are telling the truth. (For once…)

: Er, rather, that does not clear up the contradiction.
: There is one scenario that would explain their conflicting accounts.
: What!?

Convergence.

: Obviously, the witness was not viewing the crime from the hotel!

: Mr. Wright! What do you mean?
: Yes, what do you mean, he was not “viewing the crime from the hotel”!?
: If he was not in the hotel, where could he have been!?
: In the law offices of Fey & Co., of course!

: More specifically, he was standing here!

: This is where he was!

: If he was watching from this point, to him it would appear that she ran to the “left.”
: Please! This is no time for jokes in ill taste!

: Order! I will have order! Anyone disturbing the order of this courtroom will be held in contempt!
: Mr. Wright! What are you suggesting?

: The postulations of the defense are a distortion of the truth, Your Honor!
: Indeed. They do seem a bit far-fetched…
: …

: You provide us with so much entertainment, Mr. Lawyer!
: (What now!? He’s… laughing!?)
: The hilarity of the moment made me remember something… It appears I have been unclear, and for this, I apologize.
: Mr. Your Honor… Might I be allowed to testify once more?
: Very well, let’s hear your revised testimony.
: (Good luck. You can’t fix a broken testimony, buddy!)

: Hmm… That does seem to make sense.
: Will you be cross-examining the witness’s testimony?
: You bet I will! I mean, yes, Your Honor.

: What do you mean by that!

: You Americans, always so impatient! It does not become you.
: (Hey buddy, you’re an American, too!)

: What do you mean “first”?
: “First”? That is what comes before what happens “next.” You do speak English, right?
: Please, sit back, relax. I will try to use simple words for your benefit. First, she ran to the left, and then…

: I didn’t hit anyone!

: I’m not hiding anything!

: The prosecution requests that the defense refrain from interrupting the testimony!
: Mr. Wright, you have been warned.
: (Why’s he mad at me!?)

: What do you mean “next”!?
: “Next” is what comes after “first.”
: I know that!
: Then that is all you need to know, Mr. Lawyer.
: As I said, she turned and made a desperate dash to the right.

: Stop saying it was me!

: But, it was you.

: Mr. Wright! If you claim that it was NOT you, then show us proof!
: (Argh! Can I do nothing right? Nothing!?)
: May I continue?

: So each of you saw different parts…?
: Abso-posi-lutely! That’s right, of course!
: (Where did he pick up that annoying phrase…?)
: Anyway, moving along!

: So were you watching both times?
: I suppose I was.
: And please excuse me for not testifying to this sooner!

And we loop - they actually cut off the last bit of his testimony for some reason.

: What do you think Phoenix?
: I think we’ve got him right where we want him! He slipped! Let him laugh for now. I’ll soon wipe that smile off his face!

Next time: Doing that. But how?

[quote=Louisiana Rev. Stat., Section 4:81]Open betting or quoting of odds; insulting or abusive remarks [related to boxing or wrestling matches]
A. There shall be no open betting or quoting of odds in the club or arena where the exhibition or contest is being held. Whoever does so shall be ejected.
B. There shall be no insulting or abusive remarks made by seconds, managers, or spectators and directed at the contestants. The officers of the club and the attending member of the commission shall at once eject persons who violate this or any other provision of this Chapter.[/quote]

[morsrattus]

Case 2- Turnabout Sisters
Trial #2 - Part 2

: Mr. White!
: The victim died from a “single” blow!

: What do you have to say to that?
: Er… Erp!
: (Now’s my chance to hit him where it counts!)
: Mr. White. Wasn’t it you who told the court you were “abso-posi-lutely perfect”?
: Mmph. I will refrain from using this phrase from now on.
: Your Honor, if you could ask the witness for a new testimony…

: The witness is obviously confused, Your Honor! I would like to request a 10 minute break!
: Yes… yes, quite.

: The witness is confused because he’s lying!

: Very well. If the witness would care to revise his testimony…
: (The crowd’s on my side! No slipping out of this now, White!)
: Mr. White?
: O… okay…

: Hmm. “Thwap” indeed.
: Very well, you may begin the cross-examination.
: Mr. Your Honor… My stomach, you see, it is hurting…

: This is almost over.
: …!

: You heard “that thing fall”? What exactly was “that thing”?
: Huh? Oh… oh, that? Umm… the glass light stand!
: (Right… the one that had fallen over at the scene.)
: Phoenix!

: (Yeah, that is odd. I’ll press further.) Mr. White.
: Huh? W-what?
: You’re saying you saw the glass light stand?
: Y-yes.
: Then change your testimony to reflect that!
: S-sorry. My bad…
: The witness will revise his testimony.
: Okay okay. Of course.

: The “glass stand was lying on the floor”? That’s the first I’ve heard of this.
: Why didn’t you tell us about the stand before?
: W-why? Me? W-well… I was instructed not to… wait!
: One moment! Give me a minute to gather my thoughts.
: I am so… so confused.
: (White’s falling apart.)

: Your Honor! Please, I ask that you do not allow the witness to be badgered any further!
: M-Mr. Wright. Please refrain from badgering the witness…

: Very well. The witness may continue his account.

: “Miss Mia”…? Mr. White, did you know the victim personally?
: No no no, triple no! How would I? How could I!

: I see nothing odd about the witness knowing the name of the victim.
: Mr. Wright! I will not have you harrying the witness!
: (You’re looking a little flustered, Edgeworth!)

: Now before, you said that she was hit before she ran.
: Y-yes, I must have been confused. But don’t worry! We all know what happened now.

: What did you do then?
: I gave chase, of course!

: Mr. White, please try to remain calm.

: Oh… oh right. Thank you, Miles.

: “Thwap”…? That doesn’t sound like the “savage” attack from your earlier testimony…
: Ho! Hoh hoh! Yes, well, I am a man of peace, you see.

Loop!

: Phoenix! He’s getting a lot less talkative.
: He’s probably afraid I’ll catch him on something! (But it won’t be easy!)

What to catch him on, though?

: Mr. White.
: It was impossible for you to have seen the glass stand!

: These are the floor plans to the scene of the murder, yes?

: This is the area you would be able to see!

: Well…? Note that the stand is not within the visible area!
: Well, Mr. White!
: What do you have to say to that!?

: Er… erp!
: Ri… dicu… losity…
: Mr. White.
: If you were in the Gatewater hotel as you claim, you could not have seen the stand before it fell over! In fact, you wouldn’t have been able to see it after it fell, either!

: So, when did you see the stand, Mr. White?
: It must have been the moment that it fell! And the only place you could have seen that from… is inside the Fey Law Offices!

: Mr… White?

: Mr. White.

: You did it, didn’t you?

: (Heh. Looks like we’re about to get our verdict!)

: That’s far enough, Phoenix Wright!

: Mr. White…

: I think the time has come. Shouldn’t you confess your crime now, hmm?
: W… what?

: Ergo,
: confess that you placed the wiretap!
: The w-wiretap!?

: Order! Order!
: Mr. Edgeworth! Explain to the court what you mean by this!
: Distinguished members of the court… Mr. White is slightly confused. Allow me to explain.
: (I really don’t like the way this is headed…)
: As you know, Mr. White is the CEO of Bluecorp. He ordered his secretary, Miss April May, to tap the law offices of Ms. Fey.
: What does that have to do…?
: Your Honor.
: The question is: when was the wiretap placed in the office, and by who?
: No! You wouldn’t!
: Mr. White. In order to place the wiretap, you entered Ms. Fey’s office. Am I correct…?
: …
: !
: C-correct! You are most correct, Miles!

: Yes… in order to place the wiretap, I breached the Fey & Co. Law Offices!
: That is when I saw that accursed light stand!

: Now I’m confused. Please explain to the court what all this means, Mr. Edgeworth!
: Gladly, Your Honor.
: Mr. Phoenix Wright has made his position quite clear. He has determined that Mr. White knew the glass stand was in the office. He has shown that there was only one time Mr. White could have seen the stand: At the very moment of the murder! Thus, Mr. Wright would like you to believe that Mr. White was the murderer!
: I see.
: However!
: It is a fact that Mr. White had been to that office well before the murder took place! He went to place the wiretap! He could have seen the glass light stand then.

: Mr. White! You will testify to the court about this wiretap!

: Ahem. Leave it to me!
: (I… I feel faint.)

: Hmm…
: So you saw the stand before the night of the incident…
: And this is how you were able to identify what had fallen over. By the sound?

: Correct! That is right.
: I see. Very well, Mr. Wright, you may cross-examine.
: (Gah! What am I supposed to do now…!?)
: Good luck, Phoenix…

: D-do you have proof!?

: Miss April May knew the details of Ms. Fey’s phone conversation! This proves that the wiretap was placed before the murder!
: Huh… right.

: Was it really you that went into the office? Or was it Miss May?

: Unidentified fingerprints several days old were found in the Fey & Co. Law Offices.
: Those were obviously Mr. White’s.
: (And if I know Edgeworth, he’s already run a check on those prints…)

: Now, Mr. White. Tell us why you went to the Fey & Co. Law Offices.

: Why did you tap Mia’s phone!?

: This has no bearing on the current case, Your Honor.

: We have a responsibility to protect client confidentiality!

: Why did you notice something as innocuous as a light stand!?
: The light stand was made entirely out of glass. It was quite stylish, so I guess it made a lasting impression on me.
: Such a beautacious thing deserves attention, does it not? That is all.

Loop.

: (Dammit! There’s nothing there for me to press him on! Oh well… maybe he’s rattled enough that I can bluff something out of him!)

However, when we go back through the testimony…

: (Uh oh! Don’t tell me I’ve run out of ammo!)
: Tsk tsk. I’m afraid that’s as far as you go, Mr. Wright.
: The time has come for you to admit your defeat! You fought… honorably.

: (No more… I can’t take this anymore…)
: Mr. Wright? Are you giving up?
: … Y-yes, Your Honor.

: …?
: (Phoenix! Over here!)
: (I know that voice! …)

Next time: ???

[quote=Louisiana Rev. Stat., Section 14:312]No person shall dive or jump off of any public bridge, constructed or owned by the state or any of its political subdivisions, where the object and purpose of the act is to gain publicity.
Whoever violates this Section shall be fined not more than twenty-five dollars, or imprisoned for not more than thirty days, or both.[/quote]

[morsrattus]

Case 2 - Turnabout Sisters
Trial #2 - Part 3

: What happened? … Oh, right… I lost the trial. I was… hallucinating. …

: Ah, you’re finally awake.

: … “Gak”? That’s no way to greet an old friend! Phoenix, I want you to look at me.

: Y-You’re… M-Maya…?

: When you accepted your defeat in court… It appears that was enough of a shock to awaken Maya’s true powers.
: So… Maya is channeling you, Mia?
: That’s right. I am Maya, but I’m also Mia.

: Maya never gave up. You can’t either! That’s what I came here to tell you.
: …! B-but!
: We don’t have much time, Phoenix. Now listen. You’ve already won.
: Huh…?
: You have that Receipt in the court record, right?

: Phoenix! White wrote that, not me!
: So… so what do I do with it?
: Look at the front of the receipt!
: The… front?

: (Looks like it’s from a famous department store. “$1,000.00”… wow, big spender! “Item”… “glass light stand”…! “Date of purchase”… “September 4”…) …! September 4!
: That’s right, Phoenix.

: I bought that stand the day before I was killed!
: Whoa!
: Now, what did Mr. White say in his testimony?

: There you go! I think the court is about to reconvene!
: Go do it, Phoenix! You know you’re innocent, now you just have to prove it!
: Right!

: The court will now reconvene for the trial of Mr. Phoenix Wright.
: Is the defendant… rather, are you alright, Mr. Wright?
: Yes. Sorry, Your Honor. I’m fine now.
: Then, let’s start where we left off.

: Your Honor.
: There is nothing to go back to! The cross-examination of Mr. White is finished!
: All that is required now is for you to pass judgment on the defendant Phoenix Wright!
: Hmm…

: Your Honor! Please, give me one more chance. I promise you, this is the last time I’ll ask you!
: Hmm…
: But, as Mr. Edgeworth has noted, the trial is more or less finished.
: Mr. Edgeworth, do you have an opinion on this matter?

: I say… let us give Mr. Phoenix Wright his “last chance.”
: Very well! You may begin your cross-examination.

: Do you have proof!?

: Miss April May knew the details of Ms. Fey’s phone conversation! This proves that the wiretap was placed before the murder!
: Huh… right. (Gah! I have to show him the evidence Mia gave me!)

That’s about all that changes - that line gets appended to the end of everything,

: See the word “Maya” written in blood…?

: I think not. Look at the other side of the receipt.
: Th-the other side?
: Your Honor. Would you tell the court what is written on the other side of that receipt?

: Well! A “glass light stand”! And the date of purchase… Why, that’s the day before the murder!

: Mr. White. When you allegedly entered Fey & Co. Law Offices at the beginning of September…

: Well, Mr. White? Can’t get out of this one, can you?

: (Uh oh… he’s losing it.) …
: Well, Your Honor. I understand there must be quite a bit of PRESSURE on you.

: But I think you’ll agree you can’t judge me “guilty” under these circumstances.
: ! … Very well.

: Then, that is all for the trial of…

: Not so fast, Phoenix Wright!

: Eh? (What! No way can he worm his way out of this one! Oh wait… I forgot. It’s Edgeworth.)

: There is a certain thread of logic to the defendant’s claims.

: However! There is no concrete proof that Phoenix Wright is innocent!
: i[/i]
: Ergo!
: I would like to request one more day before Phoenix Wright is granted his freedom. I need time to make one more inquiry into this matter.
: Hmm…!
: (Another inquiry…!? This isn’t going to be another one of those “updated autopsy reports”! This guy just makes up evidence as he pleases!)

: (Hmm. I don’t know where he’s going with this. I’d better hold back for now.)
: I see…
: Very well. As there is no objection from the defense, I grant Mr. Edgeworth his extra day.

: Mr. White’s guilt is obvious! There is no need to prolong this trial any further!
: Hmm.
: Well, Mr. Edgeworth?

: If anyone is going to call Mr. White to trial, it would be me, the prosecution.
: I need a day to ascertain whether your claims have any basis in factual evidence!
: Hmm.
: I see. Objection denied!
: Whaaaat!

Convergence.

: The completion of the trial of Mr. Phoenix Wright will be postponed until tomorrow.
: (No! There’s no telling what will happen if I can’t end this now!)

: (Edgeworth is sure to come up with–or just make up–something! And after Mia showed up to help me and all…)

: Mr. Your Honor!
: May I go home?
: Of course. Thank you for your time.
: i[/i]

: i[/i]

: Read this note out loud.
: Mia? What’s this…?

: Your Honor. If I may…?
: You’re quite persistent today, Mr. Wright!
: (You bet I am! My life is riding on this one!)

: Many of them sounded strangely familiar. People in finance, famous celebrities… That’s when it happened.

: P-please, stop! Make him stop! How… how did you get that list!?
: Mr. White. Admit your guilt, right here, right now. Or else this list will be released to the press!

: Case closed, Your Honor.

: Well, I see no reason to continue this trial.
: Mr. Wright?
: Yes, Your Honor.
: You’ve done it again! that was quite a spirited defense!
: Yes, Your Honor. I guess you could say that. (If only you knew how “spirit”-ed it was!)
: Hmm. Well!
: This court finds the defense… Ahem! Rather, the defendant, Mr. Phoenix Wright…

: That is all. The court is adjourned!

: But, congratulations! You’re lucky I was born a Fey!
: I’m lucky I had both you and Maya on my side.
: I’m glad you made it. … Thank you, Phoenix. You risked a lot to help me… and Maya. I won’t forget it as long as I live!
: (As long as you “live”…?)
: … My time here’s running out.
: Huh?
: Maya’s powers are still weak.
: I can’t stay here that long.
: W-what!? No! There’s still so much to say!
: Don’t worry. I’m sure we’ll meet again.
: Ch-Chief!
: Hee hee. I’m not the “Chief” anymore.
: Phoenix? Can you come to the office tonight… say, 9:00?
: The office…?
: I’ll see you later.

: You came!
: Mia…
: I was kinda worried you might not.
: Huh? Of course I came…
: Well then! I’m pretty hungry. How about a burger?
: M-Mia…?
: … Bwah hah hah! You should see your face!
: Mia!

: M-Maya…?

: (Look like… you WERE her!)
: Hmm! I might be able to use that. “Oh, Phoenix! Go to the store and buy me lunch, would you?”
: Uhm, Maya… Why are you here?

: See? Mia wrote me a letter. “Take care of Phoenix for me.”
: Take care of… huh?
: She means the office! This office!
: Someone has to help with the new Wright & Co. Law Offices, right?

: Wait, no, on second thought, let’s make this casual!
: Yo, Nick! Maya here, ready to get down to business! You… don’t mind me calling you “Nick,” do you? It’s a great name! Mia said that’s what your friend Larry calls you.
: i[/i]
: You know what this means? We’re partners!

: It is Maya’s fault I’m here now. But… If it wasn’t for her I’d probably be in jail! “Wright & Co. Law Offices.” It’s got a good ring to it. Yeah! Thanks, Maya!

: (Good luck, Phoenix. I’ll always be here… watching.)

: Huh? Do… what?
: Burgers, dummy! Burgers! There’s a great burger joint just down the street. C’mon! Time’s a wasting!
: O-okay! Wait up!

Next time: Turnabout Samurai

@Louisiana Rev. Stat.

Theft of an alligator is the misappropriation or taking of an alligator, an alligator’s skin, or a part of an alligator, whether dead or alive, belongong to another, either without the consent of the other to the misappropriation or taking, or by means of fraudulent conduct, practices, or representations. An intent to deprive the other permanently of the alligator, the alligator’s skin, or a part of an alligator is essential.

[morsrattus]

(this is filler, and apparently I have a limit to edits???)

[morsrattus]

(i’ll just have to add the links to the top post later I guess)

[morsrattus]

(anyway, case 3 now.)

[morsrattus]

Case 3 - Turnabout Samurai
Investigation (Day 1) - Part 1

Video intro

: The pale moon in the sky cries for your blood!

: The moon? No, it is you who should gaze upon the moon… For it will be the last moon you ever see!

: See you in hell, Evil Magistrate!

: The warriors’ swords gleam and strike in the moonlight! One has fallen… but who? Only the moon knows! Don’t miss next week’s exciting episode: “The Dark Messenger Returns!”

: “See you in Hell, Evil Magistrate!!!”
: Whoa! Stop waving that broom around!
: Oh, Nick! I didn’t know you were here!
: Of course I’m here! What was that surreal show you were watching?

: Young…? Like, how young?
: Umm… 10 years old?
: Then what the heck are YOU doing getting all excited!?
: Hey! I’m only 17!

: Hey! Don’t talk to me like I’m your grandpa or something. I’m only 24 myself.
: Then watch it with me! He’s really cool! And… it’s really popular!
: When they asked grade school kids what they wanted to be, “Steel Samurai” was no.1!
: I really worry about kids these days.
: Gramps!
: Well, the Steel Samurai’s over. I guess it’s time to close up the office.
: I guess… Wish we had some clients!

: Mia’s murder was the talk of the town for some time… But no one paid any attention to the Wright & Co. Law Offices… How am I going to pay the rent this month?

: I’m sure some big client is just around the corner!
: Hmph.

: H-hello? This is Phoenix.
: N-N-Nick!!!
: Maya? What? It’s still early…
: I-it’s the Steel Samurai! The Steel Samurai got arrested!
: Huh? You mean the guy on that show?
: Yes! They’re saying that the Steel Samurai killed a villain!
: … Umm… Isn’t that what he’s supposed to do?
: Yeah, on TV!
: Yeah, on TV.
: No! I mean, he actually did it! In real life! He skewered a villain with his Samurai Spear!
: I have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about.
: Just come to the office, quick! Please, Nick!

: (Maya’s here… watching television.)

: The actor Will Powers was arrested yesterday. Powers plays the lead role in the popular kid’s show “The Steel Samurai: Warrior of Neo Olde Tokyo.” He was arrested on suspicion of murder. The victim was Jack Hammer, who plays the villain known as the “Evil Magistrate.” His body was found still inside the Evil Magistrate costume. The “Samurai Spear” was also found stuck through the body. Police believe this was the murder weapon, and are investigating further.
: …
: This has to be a joke.
: No, no, no! It’s a nightmare! The Steel Samurai is over! The world is over!

: Yes… Wright & Co. Law Offices. …
: What!? Nick! I-it’s the Steel Samurai!
: W-what!?
: Yes… yes, of course! We’ll be right there!

: Let’s go, Nick!
: Go? Go where?
: They have the Steel Samurai down in detention!
: So what!?
: So, I’ve decided this will be our first case!

But before that, let’s take a look around.

: It’s a nice day outside. The hotel across the way is always full these days. There’s the bellboy, happily cleaning the room.

: Mia’s favorite potted plant. Maya has been watering it so much lately it looks a little… swollen. She’s either trying to make it grow… or she’s perfecting her water torture technique.

: Mia’s desk. Actually… it’s my desk now. Sitting here always makes me feel like a professional.

: A poster of an old movie that Mia liked. I was thinking I should go see it myself. Then I realized that the poster doesn’t actually say the title of the movie.

: There’s a horrendous amount of legal books here. Scarier still is the thought that I have to read all of these now.

And we can chat with Maya. Usually, Maya has some vague advice on the current situation, but I doubt I’ll ever remember to check back in with her between investigation events beyond those that bring us back to the office.

: Well, what should we do?
: What should we do!? How can you just sit there like that!? We have to get down to the detention center and meet the Steel Samurai!
: (Does she want to investigate this case or just do some sightseeing, I wonder? My money’s on sightseeing.)

: We don’t have enough information to make a case yet.
: Just admit it: you don’t have a clue what happened.
: No! We just don’t have enough information!

And the badge…

: You like showing that off, don’t you, Nick?
: (My poor, poor ego…)

And let’s check the Court Record.

Okay, let’s get moving.

: …
: What’s wrong, Maya? It’s him! In the flesh!
: Umm… Is that guy really him?
: Whaddya mean “that guy”? Of course it’s him! Will Powers, our client! That’s him.
: Um, maybe I shouldn’t be saying this…
: But he definitely did it. Murder. At least once. Maybe twice.
: Whoa whoa whoa! What are you saying!?

: Y-yes!?
: Something wrong…?
: N-no! No!
: (This is getting off to a great start.)

: D-disappointed!? Oh, no. Oh no.
: No, it’s okay. This is the real me. When I got the part of the Steel Samurai, with that mask… I decided I would never show my face in public until the job was over. It’s the kids, you know. I didn’t want to wreck their dreams.
: Oh…
: I guess it didn’t matter. So much for dreams. I wonder what they think of the Steel Samurai now. sniff Uwaaah!
: Nick!
: What?
: He’s a good guy! I mean, he’s good!
: Yeah.
: He didn’t do it!
: …

So, let’s get cracking.

: Smile for the camera…

: This guard monitors the visitor’s room. He seems frozen in awe of Will Powers.

: Maybe you could start by telling us what happened.
: Y-yes. Of course. It seems like it was only yesterday. Actually, it was only yesterday. The cast had come down to Global Studios for a run-through. We went through a few action sequences at 10:00 that morning. There was a rehearsal scheduled for 5:00 in the afternoon. But when 5:00 came around, and the staff gathered at the studio… The Evil Magistrate was found lying in a crumpled heap near the set.

: And discovered that it was Jack Hammer… dead! He had been expertly skewered with the Samurai Spear.
: The “Samurai Spear”…?
: Yes, it’s a long spear that I… that the Steel Samurai uses as a weapon.

: Maybe you could explain to me just what “the Steel Samurai” is.
: Nick! How could you say such a thing?
: I-I’m sorry, sir, I apologize for my partner!
: He’s new to this, and a bit OUT OF TOUCH with the world.
: Hey! Who’s “new to this”!?
: No, it’s alright, really.
: The Steel Samurai is the lead character in a popular kid’s show. He walks the streets of Neo Olde Tokyo… Fighting battle after battle against the Evil Magistrate and his minions. Of course, he never really defeats the Evil Magistrate.
: Although… I guess he did defeat him this time… sniff Uwaaah!
: I-I see. (Neo Olde Tokyo…? Who comes up with these names!?)

: Now, where were you on the day of the murder?
: Well, that morning I came to studios at 9:00.

: Rehearsal was to begin at 5:00, but I was a little tired.

: When I woke up, it was after 5:00! I was late for the rehearsal!

: They arrested me on the spot, and brought me here.
: (So he was sleeping the entire afternoon of the murder? Some action hero!)
: What will the kids think? sniff
: I think I should probably check out the scene of the murder…
: Right… Global Studios. I’ll draw you a map.
: Wow! Nick! Let’s go!
: (I’m willing to bet 10 bucks she asks for autographs.)

Naturally, we end with the badge.

: I… I see. …
: (Let me guess… this guy wasn’t the top student in improv class.)

: Wow! So this is where they make the Steel Samurai show!
: Awesome! Aren’t you excited!?

: You want in, you gotta go through me!
: O-oh… s-sorry! W-we’re, um, lawyers.

: And it’s my job to make sure that gawkers like you stay OUT.
: G-gawkers?
: Gawkers! Sightseers! Tourists!!! I know the type. You heard about the incident and came to snoop around.

: Umm… Nick?
: Will I grow up to be like her? Please say “no.”
: I dunno! It’s possible.
: Hey!
: Listen when you’re being spoken to! Youths today!

As always, our first task is to poke around.

: The main entrance to the studio. There was a big scene here yesterday with onlookers pressuing up against the gate.

: An overhead map of the studios. Right from here is the Employee Area. To the left are the actual film studios.

: The computer that runs the studio security cameras.

: The security guard station. That security lady must like junk food., There’s a mountain of it on the desk in there. I can see the computer that runs the security cameras.

: Looks like a studio van. They probably use it to carry around film equipment.

: So, what do you do here at the studios?
: At Global Studios, we make children’s dreams come true!

: No! You were a star!?
: Only a little twinkle between the stars here, I’m afraid, dearie.
: Wo… wow.
: This place has really gone downhill, you know? But 10 years ago, now that was a studio of dreams!
: Hammer was a big star back then too, he was…
: Hammer…?
: The victim, dummy!
: The Evil Magistrate!
: He’s been reduced to playing villains now. Not exactly the best material to work with…

: Can you tell me about Mr. Will Powers?
: He’s not a bad kid, but don’t be fooled by his mask!
: You wouldn’t want him on the silver screen without it, believe me. Little old ladies watching would lose their lunch!
: That’s probably why he thought that the Steel Samurai was his “big chance.” No one thought he was capable of doing what he did to poor Jack Hammer…
: We don’t know for certain that Will Powers is guilty!
: Powers? Of course he’s guilty!
: How do I know? I know everything! That’s my job.

: What kind of person was Jack Hammer?
: What “kind of person”? Oh… if you only knew!
: Jack Hammer will live on in many hearts as the ultimate action hero!

: (Should I have heard of that…?)
: But… there was an accident during filming five years ago. He got an unlucky break after that. Reduced to playing the villain on a children’s program! What’s more, I heard they were paying him peanuts. It’s enough to make you cry.

: Why are you so certain Mr. Powers is the killer?
: I was standing right here yesterday, I was. I was here from 1:00 in the afternoon, to 5:00, when they found the body!
: Now the studio where the murder took place is to the left here. So if you want to go to the studio, you have to pass by me!
: Only one person went by here between 1:00 and 2:30, when the murder took place!
: And… that person was Mr. Powers?
: Yes. I saw him!
: But Mr. Powers says he was sleeping in his dressing room.
: Oh, I’m sure he would say that. He’s no fool! But he was the only one that walked by.
: He’s the killer, you can bet your biscuits on it. Isn’t it about time for you to be heading home?
: There’s nothing to see here. Move along.
: Um, actually, we’re here at Mr. Powers’s request.
: Hmph! I thought you were suspicious lookin’! Show me a “letter of request.”
: And maybe I’ll just let you in.
: This lady here thinks she owns this place, obviously.

Well, at least we have some new Court Record entries.

And a badge, of course.

: What’s that? You giving that to me?
: (Absolutely not!)

So it looks like we’ll have to go back to Will and get a letter before she’ll let us in.

Next time: We do that thing.

[quote=Nevada Rev. Stat. Subsections 642.470, 642.480, on unprofessional conduct of funeral directors.][U]nprofessional conduct includes:

1. Misrepresentation or fraud …
2. Solicitation of dead human bodies by the licensee or his or her agents, assistants or employees, whether the solicitation occurs after death or while death is impending, but this does not prohibit general advertising.
   […]
3. Gross immorality.
   […]
4. Using profane, indecent or obscene language in the presence of a dead human body, or within the immediate hearing of the family or relatives of a deceased whose body has not yet been interred or otherwise disposed of.[/quote]

[morsrattus]

Case 3 - Turnabout Samurai
Investigation (Day 1) - Part 2

We left off having to go get a note from Will before we could get into the studio.

: They all think I did it, don’t they?
: N-no, not at all! Isn’t that right, Nick?
: Right, not at all. At worst, you’re a suspect.
: sniff

: Mr. Powers, you aren’t hiding anything from me, are you?
: W-what? No! I’d never do that!
: Just now you said that you were sleeping in your dressing room after lunch.
: Yes. Like a baby.
: But the security lady said she saw you that day. She says she saw you heading towards the scene of the crime!
: W-what!? That’s not possible! I… I really don’t know what to say! I was sleeping, I promise!
: Mr. Powers, if you want me to help you, you have to tell me the truth. I’m new to this lawyer business, and I need every advantage I can get.
: I know… I-I’m sorry. sniff But, I swear to you on my momma’s grave, I was sleeping. Maybe the security lady only thought she saw me?
: (What did she see…? He doesn’t seem to be lying.)

: Umm… about the security guard at the main gate to the studio…
: Oh, the security lady?
: She’s terrible! She called me “suspicious lookin’”!
: Y-yes… actually, she’s said the same thing to me before. “Take off that mask!” were her words, I believe. She sucks up to all the bigwigs at the studio… But let her see you stumble once and she’ll never let up on you.
: Grr! She’s got some nerve!
: Do you think you could write up a letter formally requesting my representation?
: Of c-course.

: (I just hope this will get me past that security lady.)

Let’s find out.

: Hmm…? Yes, yes. I recognize the bold, childish scrawl.

: To think he would entrust his fate to youths of such unreliable appearance…
: Really!
: Really?
: Anyway, you may pass. But only left from here, toward the studios! No going to the right. That’s the Employee Area.
: “No one allowed inside, pal” were my instructions. The good detective told me himself.
: Hey, hey, Nick.
: Huh?

: Hey! Not bad!

: 50 cents!

: Aren’t you that murderer from the other day!

: Hey pal, you know Prosecutor Edgeworth is all upset, and it’s your fault!

: Umm… so?
: Hey! If he’s depressed, it’s all your fault for doing sloppy detective work!
: !!! … … …
: Um, Detective?
: I think you hurt his feelings.
: Oh no! I… I’m sorry!
: Well, I think his feelings are easily hurt.
: You’re right, pal. It’s all my fault. I can blame other people all I want, but I know the truth in my heart!
: Hey, hey! Don’t take it so hard! There’s always the next case!
: Yeah, I suppose you’re right.
: Hey!
: What exactly are you two doing here?
: Um, well…
: We’re on this case too, pal!
: Huh!? Hey! You can’t just go saying “pal” like that! That’s MY endearing character trait!
: I’d say he’s a character alright…

Let’s take a look around.

: Detective Gumshoe, what’s down the path to the left? It looks like a tree fell down over the path…?
: Oh, yeah. That way’s kind of dangerous. You should stay out, pal. There’s nothing down there, anyway.
: That’s where Studio Two used to be, they tell me. They don’t use it now, though.

: Hey, there’s a camera here.
: That’s the security camera. It takes photos of people going to the studio.
: All you have to do is look at the data and you can see who went where!
: There’s a number plate on the camera… [ST1-307]. That must be the camera ID number.

: I’m a little bushed. Maybe I’ll take a short rest here.
: Hey, good idea, pal!
: Detective! Aren’t you on the case?
: W-well, yeah, but… Hey, us detectives get tired of standing around too, pal!

: There’s a big welcome sign above the path.
: Yeah, apparently the studio’s fallen on tough times. They’ve started letting people in on days they aren’t filming. They make a bit of extra money by charging for admission.
: Huh. You sure know a lot about this place, Detective.
: You know, you could always quit being a detective and work here?
: Yeah! And what perfect timing, with the monkey’s neck broken and all.
: Huh? Just what’s that supposed to mean, pal!?

: The studio mascot. I guess it’s a monkey of some kind. But what kind of monkey has a nose like that? He’s holding a sign in his hand. [Right: To Studio One. Left: To Studio Two.]

: Oh, the wind was pretty strong yesterday, and the head broke off. It took that tree down with it, too.

: The entrance to Studio One. This is the studio where they found Jack Hammer’s body.
: Let’s go in and check it out, Nick! …
: Hey! It’s locked!
: Looks like you need a cardkey to get in. It makes sense that they would want to keep the non-employees out.

Now we can question Gumshoe.

: So, how is your investigation going, Detective?
: Well, it’s… Hey! I can’t tell you that, pal.
: Nick… Maybe you need to be a little more indirect with your questions?
: Right. So, Detective, mind if I take a look at what you got?
: What I got?
: The autopsy report! The latest version, if you please…
: Hmm… right, right. Sorry about what happened last time, pal.

: Why was Mr. Powers arrested?
: Simple, pal! The murder took place right over there in Studio One.
: Now, the victim entered Studio One at approximately 1:00 PM. At that time, there was no one other than the victim in the studio. According to the autopsy report, the time of death was 2:30 PM.
: Only one person went to the studio between 1:00 and 2:30!

: No one else, pal! If you think I’m lying, ask the security lady at the main gate.
: Nick! If that’s true…!
: Anyone would think that Powers did it with that kind of evidence!
: Thanks for cheering me up…

: About the security lady…
: Oh, that sweet old lady. What a charmer!
: Huh? A-are we talking about the same person?
: When I showed her my badge she gave me a donut and some coffee!
: Remember what Powers said. She’s a sucker for authority.
: She even gave me a piece of valuable evidence!

: What kind of evidence!?
: Well, that, er, photo.
: The photo of the Steel Samurai heading toward the scene of the crime!

: See the camera up on that gate, pal?
: The gate? You mean the one with the welcome sign?
: Yeah. Whenever someone walks by, that camera automatically snaps a photo of them!

: Nick, he has evidence! We’re finished!
: (Funny, for someone with hard proof he doesn’t look too happy.)
: …
: What’s wrong, pal? You seem down.
: Don’t look so happy when you say that.
: Oh hoh hoh hoh hoh!
: Umm… We’d like to ask the employees here some questions…
: Sure thing, pal. Go wherever you like. Of course, you’re not going to find any clues I haven’t already found! Hah hah hah!
: (I’m glad someone around here seems to be enjoying themselves.)
: Nick, let’s go! We’ve got a free pass to the place. Now’s our chance to check things out!

And hey, let’s try the badge for the road.

: Uh huh? Don’tcha think it’s a little sad when you have to explain what your badge means, pal?
: Real men show their P.D. badge and that’s that!
: I’ll admit the design of my badge leaves a lot to be desired…
: Maybe it should just be a big “L” for “Lawyer”?
: Hmm… I’m not so sure about that.

: That security lady is in the guard station stuffing her face with donuts!
: I guess all cops like their donuts!
: Yeah, and they’re soft enough she doesn’t need teeth to chew them…
: Hey, you!

: Well? Are you satisfied Powers is guilty yet?
: (Urk! She had to make my life harder by giving that photo to Detective Gumshoe…)

: Why didn’t you tell us about the security photo, ma’am?
: Hmm? Oh, that? I just thought it would be more thrilling to talk with the detective himself!
: These things are important, you know.

: It’s my job to check the photos every day, you see.

: This guard station is in a central position. No matter where you go here, you pass by my station first! Now poor Hammer, he went to the studio just before 1:00. The murder happened right around 2:30, see?
: The only one I seen go through here between 1:00 and 2:30 was Powers himself! The security camera got a good look at him too.
: If he’s not the one what did it, I don’t know who is!
: Maybe… it was you?
: Gyah hah ha hah! Good one, sonny.
: (She thinks I was joking.)

: Was the victim, Mr. Hammer, a popular actor?
: Oh, he was the biggest star in the studio!
: (“Was”? Past tense?)
: Oh yes! He was great as the “Bearded Samurai”!
: That too, yes. He shone the brightest! Back in the day.
: Making a star like him play the “Evil Magistrate”… It’s a disgrace, I tell you! Hammer took it pretty hard, and who can blame him?

: About the security camera…
: Oh yes, the camera.

: Then it snaps a photo! Apparently, it records the time when it takes a picture too.
: But I don’t bother myself with those details. I just view all the photos on the computer over in the security guard station. I check 'em every day before going home, I do.

: Nick!
: This is where they do all the behind-the-scenes stuff!
: Hey! Look! There’s Powers’s dressing room!
: No one’s here this soon after the murder I guess.
: Let’s take a look around!

An excellent idea. There’s no one here to talk to, of course, but there’s plenty to look at.

: The door to the dressing room. It’s not locked.
: Hey, Nick! Let’s take a look inside! Maybe we can find something as a souvenir…?
: What do you mean “find”!?
: You never know! There might be something like… the Samurai Spear!
: We don’t need a spear! (And that’s the murder weapon for crying out loud!)

: There’s a sign on the dressing room door. “Mr. Will Powers”… it must be neat to be the star and have your own room like this.

: A window into the dressing room. The glass is frosted, so I can’t see inside.

: Let’s see… cola, candy, chips, gum… Huh. It’s so… normal. I was expecting some cool theme snacks or something. Popcorn, at least!
: W-wait! Look! “Samurai Soda”! Nick! Try this!
: (Ladies first…)

: That must be the storage room. That’s where they keep all the film equipment.
: Wow, Nick! You know a lot about the industry!
: Umm, what else would they keep in a film studio?

: The remains of yesterday’s lunch are scattered around. Everyone was probably too shocked to clean up.

: Mmm! T-bone steak! That would have hit the spot.
: You just had a burger!
: Yeah, but I have a second stomach just for steaks.
: i[/i]

We move over to the other half of the area.

: Looks like one of those electric-powered bicycles. I dunno about these. I mean, what’s the point?
: It makes it a lot easier to go up hills!
: Don’t people cycle to get exercise!?

: There’s a half-finished backdrop for a stage here. Looks like a castle. Probably “Neo Olde Tokyo Castle.”

: The metal grate on the drain here has been taken off. That’s a pretty big drain. A kid could fit through there, I bet.
: Yeah, if you snuck in that way you wouldn’t have to pay at the gate!
: Well, if you want to leave that way, be my guest.
: Right!

Nothing left to see here, so…

: (Powers’s dressing room… So this is where he was sleeping? Or at least, this is where he claims he was sleeping.)
: No one actually saw him taking a nap here, did they?
: Right, and there’s a picture of him near the crime scene. (I hope he’s telling the truth… for his sake!)

Let’s get to work.

: Hmm? This must be Powers’s bag.
: Hey, don’t open that.

: An employee cardkey. That must be Powers’s. It says “Studio One.”
: Let’s take it, Nick!
: Borrow it. You mean borrow.

: There’s a vast array of cosmetics here.
: Ooh!
: This is the wig he used in “Samurai Boogey-Woogey”! Nick! Try this on!
: No. And how can you tell the name of a show just by looking at a wig!?
: I, um, kinda like samurai movies.
: i[/i]

: There’s some regular suits in among the costumes here. Those must be his own clothes.
: It’d be fun to wear one of the costumes…
: (I’d say you were already wearing one, myself.)

: There’s a bunch of snacks on the table. They must give these to the employees. Some tea and cookies…
: Nick… I’m hungry!
: You just had a burger!
: Yeah, but I have a separate stomach for sweets!
: (How many stomachs does this girl have!?)

: It’s locked. Looks like he doesn’t open his window much. I guess it is kind of dusty outside.

: Looks like someone was sleeping here. Maybe Powers did take a nap here yesterday…

Well, that seems to be all we can get from here today.

Next time: Studio One.

@North Carolina Admin. Code 04B.0312

A rattlesnake milking exhibition for which an admission fee is charged is subject to the gross receipts tax imposed under G.S. 105-37.1.

[morsrattus]

Case 3 - Turnabout Samurai
Investigation (Day 1) - Part 3

Why are we back here? Well, we have the Studio One keycard now.

: The entrance to Studio One. This is the studio where they found Jack Hammer’s body.
: Let’s go in and check it out, Nick!
: I wonder if this cardkey we borrowed from the dressing room will work…

: It opened!
: Alright! We’re in!
: (She’s way too happy for someone visiting a crime scene.)

: …
: What is it?
: …
: You’re real quiet all of a sudden.
: Doesn’t it give you the shivers, Nick?
: That white tape! It’s so… so real!
: Well, the Evil Magistrate did die here. And the Steel Samurai killed him. The murder weapon was the Samurai Spear. Sounds pretty real to me…

Time to look around.

: Looks like a backdrop for a stage. This must be used in the Steel Samurai show.
: Of course! That’s the mountain, Neo Fujiyama!
: Doesn’t the Steel Samurai take place in Olde Tokyo? Can you even see Mt. Fuji from there?
: Not Olde Tokyo, Nick! “Neo” Olde Tokyo!
: Oh. Right.

: Wow, look at that camera! That must cost a ton!
: Yeah! So don’t touch it!
: Whoa! It’s heavier than I thought…

: Ah, um, sorry, my partner is kind of, y’know…
: “Y’know”!? No I don’t know!
: Umm… who are you?
: Who me? I’m an assistant here. I help with props and stuff. Moving them aorund, ordering new ones, et cetera.
: We’re lawyers representing Mr. Will Powers.
: Oh, you’re WP’s people.
: “WP”…? Oh, Will Powers. W.P., I get it.
: I don’t envy you guys one bit! But… do what you can for WP, okay?

: Don’t worry, leave it to us!

: They outlined where Jack Hammer’s body lay with tape. His body was found still inside the Evil Magistrate costume. I guess that’s why the head part looks like a helmet. Funny, I expected a spear stabbing would leave at least a few bloodstains. I guess the costume must have absorbed most of it…

: Look, a ladder!
: That’s a “step”-ladder.
: So? What’s the difference?
: You need to stop judging things based on narrow-minded cultural assumptions, Nick!
: R-right… sorry. (This girl is OUT there!)

: Hey! Look! That’s the chair the director sits in! I’ve always wanted to sit in one of these.
: Hey Nick, take a look at that. One of those black-and-white boards they clap at the start of filming!
: And look! A megaphone! A real live megaphone!
: …
: Ready, Nick? Action!
: (This girl is more troubled than I thought…)

: What’s this?
: That’s for reflecting light. They call it a reflecting screen or something like that. The assistant holds it during filming.
: Huh.
: What? Where’s your enthusiasm for all things entertainment?
: Well, lighting is fine, but I’d want to be the director. Or maybe the Steel Samurai!
: (I think she’s being serious…!)

Now, let’s question that assistant.

: Could you tell me anything about the day of the murder?
: Yes. I was in the studio the whole day. I was the only assistant on staff that day, you see.
: Only one assistant?
: Yes, well, the studios aren’t doing so well right now. And yesterday was only rehearsal for our action sequences.
: I see. Neat!

: WP and Hammer were there, along with everoyne else.
: The employee area–that’s where Powers’s dressing room is, right?
: Yes, that’s the place.

: Then I saw WP go into his dressing room. But I didn’t see either of them after that.

: Did you know that Mr. Powers was sleeping in his room?
: No! I wouldn’t go in there unless I had some urgent message for him… I mean, it’s his private… What kind of a girl do you think I am!?
: W-what kind…? No, no, I’m sure you’re a fine girl. Um, sorry. (So much for getting a confirmation of Powers’s alibi.)
: What do we do, Nick? We haven’t found anything. If WP was the only one who came to the studio…
: Then he has to be the killer! They even have a photograph…
: Hmm…
: Umm… Sorry… I know you’re busy.
: Not really.
: Actually, there’s been something bothering me.
: Ah hah! That’s what I’m talking about! A clue! A lead!

: Well, I don’t know about that, but that day, just after noon, I sensed someone was here…
: You “sensed”?
: Yes, several times.
: Some other studio employees, maybe?
: No, I don’t think so. The only thing we had scheduled was an action scene run-through. I was the only assistant here that day.
: I have a feeling it was someone from… outside.
: R-really!?
: But wait, if someone had come in here…
: Wouldn’t that security lady have noticed them?
: Yeah, you’re right.
: I’m sorry I don’t have any better information than that.
: No, thanks! That helps us a lot. Anything helps.
: Let’s go put that security lady on the spot!

: So you sensed that someone other than the regular film crew was in the studio?
: Yes… I think.
: (“I think” doesn’t cut it in a witness testimony.)
: Nick! What about that security lady! If someone else came into the studio, she must have seen them!

And there’s Penny’s profile. As for our badge…

: Um, any thoughts about this?
: Sorry… I… don’t really want to think too much about what happened just yet.

: What? You’re still here?
: Really! You look as though you’ve seen a ghost!

: What? I saw that suspicious look on your face!
: I wanted to ask you again about yesterday… You came here at 1:00 PM, correct? And the estimated time of Hammer’s death was 2:30. Are you sure that Powers was the only one to go through here between those times?
: Sure as can be!
: But we have a witness who thinks there was “someone from outside” here that day.
: What!?
: Are you absolutely sure you were here watching hte whole time?
: …
: Ma’am?
: Who was it?
: Who told you that? Who dares question ME!?
: Eek!
: Alright you better tell me and tell me quick, you spiky-haired cretin! Someone’s been complaining about the work I do, eh!?
: Uh… um, we were just talking to the assistant in Studio One.
: Her! She’s not even a full-time employee!

: She left…
: Well, Nick?
: This is our chance to do what we can without her looking over our shoulders!

: The computer that runs the studio security cameras.
: Nick! Maybe we can see that photo of Powers with this computer!
: Yeah, maybe.

: Okay. Let’s give it a try.
: You know how to work these things, Nick?
: Looks like I just have to enter in a few numbers. Let’s see… first, I need the date of the murder. (It looks like the camera turned on at 1:00 PM that day… 1:00… That was when the security lady arrived at the guard station.)

Getting it wrong just has Maya and Phoenix talk about how they should go back and check the camera, not even a joke in there.

: There! Entered! …

: Let’s see what we got…

: … Huh?
: How is this a picture of Will Powers?
: Well, he is the one who always wears that suit… I guess that’s why the security lady thought it was him.
: I don’t imagine the detective was very happy with this photo as evidence.

: Huh? [Oct 15, 2:00 PM, Photo #2]
: What does that mean?
: Maybe there’s more photo data from that day?
: Nope–that’s the only one in the computer.

: Hey, hey, Nick! Can’t we use this photo as evidence for the trial?
: Yeah.
: We’ll put that security lady in her place with this!
: Right, we’ll put her in her place…

: Let’s show her this photo and see what she says!
: Wait. Let’s not.
: Why not?
: It’s never a good idea to reveal your hand to the enemy too soon.
: Nick! You’re craftier than I gave you credit for.
: Why, you could be the next… Evil Magistrate!
: Hey! Why do I have to be the villain.

That’s not my typo.

: Relax, it was just a joke! So, are we done for today?

: Still, it’d be better if we had some idea who the real killer was! Maybe it realy is that security lady…?

Next time: Trial.

[quote=“North Carolina Gen. Stat. Section 20-136”]Section 20-136. Smoke screens.
(a) It shall be unlawful for any person or persons to drive, operate, equip or be in the possession of any automobile or other motor vehicle containing, or in any manner provided with, a mechanical machine or device designed, used or capable of being used for the purpose of discharging, creating or causing, in any manner, to be discharged or emitted, either from itself or from the automobile or other motor vehicle to which attached, any unusual amount of smoke, gas or other substance not necessary to the actual propulsion, care and keep of said vehicle, and the possession by any person or persons of any such device, whether the same is attached to any such motor vehicle, or detached therefrom, shall be prima facie evidence of the guilt of such person or persons of a violation of this section.
(b) Any person or persons violating the provisions oif this section shall be guilty of a Class I felony.[/quote]

[morsrattus]

(filler)

[morsrattus]

(some more filler)