Click Here for Update 61
: “I never thought I would have the chance to go on the one this year as well…”
: “It barely even felt like I was outta the country though.”
: “Even Yusuke showed up.”
: “I’m simply glad the storm didn’t make its way over here…”
: “It may not have been the most exciting trip, but we still had a good time.”
: “Honestly though, I’m thankful we didn’t have to deal with the storm. They truly are dreadful…”
: “So, what’d you end up doin’ yesterday? You keepin’ secrets from me? That’s against the bro code!”
: “Dude, for real!? …Actually, don’t say anything. Last thing I need is your secret lover comin’ after me with an axe.”
: “It felt like this trip went by in a flash. I’m not sure if I want to go home or stay here longer at this point…”
: “Hey, why don’t we shop for souvenirs together before it’s time to go?”
: “Ooh, count me in!”
: “Allow me to join you as well… although I have no funds for souvenirs.”
: “The traditional souvenir from Hawaii is usually chocolate… oh, but Morgana can’t eat chocolate. Well, he tells us that he’s not a cat, sooo maybe it’s fine?”
: “If we’re gonna get 'em souvenirs, we gotta pick stuff they’ll really wig out over.”
: “Why don’t we split up and look around, then?”
: Butter coffee is an actual thing done by various low-carb diet programs (shit like Atkins that’s half jangly key man bullshit) where you replace the cream or sugar in your coffee with butter to reduce carb intake.
: “There’s acai powder over here.”
: “Doesn’t it feel like you could just spend forever at one of these places?”
: “I know what you mean.”
: “Ooh, well said. In that case… let’s find somethin’ we wouldn’t buy ourselves, but we’d be happy to get as a gift.”
: “I mean, this is Futaba and Morgana we’re talkin’ about. Their standards for happiness are way too high. Yusuke, you find somethin’?”
: “Uhh… wh-why?”
: “Well, Futaba loves instant yakisoba. It brilliantly meet the requirements of an item I wouldn’t buy for myself, but would please me to receive.”
: “But can’tcha just buy one’a those in Japan? Aw, crap! We’re almost outta time!”
: “Okay, Yusuke and I will find Futaba’s souvenir and we’ll leave Morgana’s to you.”
: Joker just puts in a phone call to Sonic and gets the number of that hostess club that caters to animals that are thirsty for human women.
: Someone made a joke about the writers finding a reason for every single confidant to be here, and they kinda did.
: “Ahaha, that’s a much more appropriate greeting. Aloha!”
: “Huh?”
: “Who’s that?”
: “Find anything suitable?”
: “Hmm? That girl…”
: “Ah… sorry to be a bother! I’m Yoshizawa, a first-year. It’s nice meeting you all.”
: “…Oh! You’re that gymnast!”
: “The last meet was only a short while ago, though - you’re already training for the next one? You seem to be making quite the effort.”
: “Well, I absolutely have to get the results I’m looking for at the next competition. The team’s been training with a famous coach who lives here on the island.”
: “She’s working us especially hard… we end up in tears almost every day.”
: “Your dedication to training even when overseas is admirable. We should all learn from your example.”
: “Yup!”
: “Good luck at the next meet - we’re all rooting for you!”
: “Thank you! Your kind words may be what keeps me from crying today.”
: "Hey, uh… it’s fine if you do cry, though. You know what they say: ‘what doesn’t thrill ya makes ya stronger.’ "
: I never took Ryuji for a Kelly Clarkson fan.
: “…Agh! I almost forgot we’re outta time here. Ah, welp, I’m gonna go pay for my stuff.”
: “Ooh, I oughta do that too. See you later, Yoshizawa-san!”
: “Yes, it was nice meeting you all!”
: “Mmhm, I think so too. Well, I know I’m going to win for sure this time. I’ll prove to everyone what I’m made of.”
: “I bought it earlier today at this branch of a Japanese shrine here in Hawaii. I always used to buy some kind of charm before a big competition.”
: Wikipedia tells me that there are exactly eight Shinto shrines in Hawaii - four in Honolulu, one in Hilo, one in Maalaea, one in Wailuku and one in Waipahu.
: Incidentally, up until recently there was only one Shinto shrine in the entire mainland United States.. run by a white guy in Washington state and not affiliated with any actual shrine.
: Since then, exactly one more has been constructed: the Shusse Inari Shrine in LA, which is a branch of a shrine by the same name in Japan.
: Basically what I’m saying here is that unless Kasumi went island-hopping, there’s no chance she ran into a Shinto shrine in Waikiki.
: “My sister was even more stringent with her own superstitions. The thing is… I forgot to pick one up before the last meet. I’ll be fine now, though. I just know it…”
: “I should probably get going. I almost forgot that I still need to pick up souvenirs for my family. Sorry for keeping you so long.”
: You know, there’s something kinda off about the principal - I mean in his design. His head almost seems like it’s on the wrong body - you’d expect him to look like the Duke from Resident Evil 8 with a head that big.
: It’s funny how Capcom got a fat character right in a game that has no real plot, but Hashino, a writer for a JRPG series almost ENTIRELY driven by its plot, can’t.
: What I’m saying is we need Persona 6 made by the Resident Evil team. It’d probably be a better action game than whatever the fuck Strikers is.
: Aww shit, the shrooms just kicked in.
: I think earlier I mentioned that when Futaba’s mother had a shutdown it should’ve been really fucking obvious. This is why.
: Uh-oh, here comes the Isekai Truck.
: I’m just picturing Futaba with her mother going “Okay, her eyes are rolled back into her head and she’s drooling black shit, that’s perfectly normal.”
: And now I’m wondering what the point of the “Make it look like a heart attack” was.
: “You get tanned a bit?”
: “How was Hawaii?”
: “You left the country and it was just ‘normal’?”
: “While you guys were off having fun, things here have gotten a bit more complicated.”
: Nah, masks haven’t really been hot since the vaccines hit - that’s more a 2020 thing.
: “I didn’t know they sold that kind of stuff.”
: “Should we try too? I mean, selling phantom thief merchandise.”
: “I don’t think we need to worry about that. They’ll get caught the second they try to sue. Not like I’d actually wanna sell their stuff anyway.”
: If I was that one guy who does cocktails based on game stuff I’d probably do one for P5, but you know what, let me try anyway.
: First, you take vodka. This represents Persona 2. Then you dump a capful of the vodka into a gallon of lemonade. This represents this game defanging fucking everything to the point that nothing means anything anymore and having characters that are at best bland copies of the ones Satomi Tadashi wrote.
: Now you might say “Timrod, that’s just a vodka lemonade recipe you stole” and you’re absolutely right, congratulations, you now understand Hashino’s entire modus operandi.
: “Well…”
: “There he is, the anti-thief detective. I hope he slips up and self-destructs.”
: “I can sense some chivalry behind their actions. They are clever to take the silent resentments of the public into account and relieve them. I believe that may be the secret to their popularity.”
: “This doesn’t change the fact that they are dangerous. However… no, I shouldn’t say any more..”
: “Oh no, I won’t be falling for that. I’ve learned my lesson after the previous backfire…”
: “These thieves are more popular than the police or politicians. What’s the world coming to?”
: “Rude!”
: “What’re you so angry about? Hey, I’m gonna go to the bathroom. Take care of any customers that show up.”
: “Seriously? Jet lag? Fine then. Tomorrow.”
: Oh, right! Recently, they announced a Part 6 for Lupin III. Guess what the color scheme on the poster for it is? Black and red.
: What Hashino steals, Monkey Punch steals right back, and I love it. I’m just hoping they don’t go the dumbass “Current Events Lupin” that happened in Part 5.
: “…You look sleepy.”
: “…Oh, that’s right. Maruki did stop by.”
: I mean, it’s kind of obvious he couldn’t be because that plot thread gets resolved in the base game.
: Yusuke is the single most genre-savvy character in this game.
: Now, if you’ve been following along, you might notice that Maruki has had a cutscene with every single party member.. except Yusuke. I wonder why that is?
: There’s an optional IM thing right after this one, so let’s go through that.
: I’m surprised Ryuji would even have enough hair to hold a flower, given how short his hair is.
: And this is why Ryuji cannot find a girlfriend.
: I saw this and I’m like “There is no way this shot exists and no one has done Yusuke as Crash Bandicoot”. No one has. Once again, Deviantart is a disappointment.
: Of course, the question remains: if Yusuke is Crash, who gets to be Coco? Futaba’s a strong candidate, but Ann has the hair for it.
: “Never mind, you should probably get some rest. Don’t worry, it’s nothing important.”
: “You just got back from your trip and you’re already studying? How diligent.”
: “I have souvenirs for you.”
: “He suddenly stopped while crossing the road and was struck by a large vehicle. Death by external trauma. They say suicide was a strong possibility…”
: You know what would’ve made this more effective? If they had saved the principal’s death cutscene until now.
: “Principal Kobayakawa commited suicide!?”
: “But would someone about to kill themselves try to go to the police station? He even used a taxi to get there.”
: The other LP asked the question of “Why is the principal even in the shadowy cabal in the first place”, but I think a better question is “If he knew he was part of a shadowy cabal that can kill people remotely, why would he not have written something down?”
: “Do you mean… this might be another incident?”
: “Even if he had a sudden shift in his state of mind.. it’s still unnatural. I can only suspect that he had a ‘change of heart’.”
: Oh boy, this scene. Makoto’s being THE SMART GIRL again.
: This should’ve been a dead giveaway the way Akechi’s “pancakes” line was.
: “W-Well… in prior cases, the changes of heart seemed to be done to make people confess their crimes. It’s hard to explain, but this incident seems contradictory to their usual modus operandi…”
: I’m surprised she didn’t stick an “our” in there by accident.
: “Did Principal Kobayakawa seem any different to you lately?”
: “I don’t really know. He rarely contacted the students, after all…”
: “I see… could something have happened during the school trip? Ah, you’re studying. I’m sorry to bother you.”
: And yet somehow, Sae has no suspicions about Makoto until we fucking tell her outright that Makoto was with John Persona.
: yawn “I’m so sleepy. You over your jet lag?”
: “For real? That was quick… oh yeah! Never mind that. Did you know about this? The Phantom Thieves are popular now! I was surprised when we got back to Japan.”
: “People’re actually payin’ attention to who we’re gonna target next. Ain’t that amazin’? I’m gettin’ really psyched. This is where we work hard!”
: “Let’s do something big again and surprise the world!”
: “Oh, mornin’. You’re back today too, huh?”
: “Yes! It’s good to see you both. Um, may I join you two on the way to school? I want to talk a bit more about the trip - and I want to hear all of your stories from Hawaii!”
: “You got it! Should I start with all the heroic stuff me and this dude did for the people in Hawaii?”
: You’re in the wrong timeline, Ryuji. This is the More Like Yusu-Gay timeline, not the one where you hit on every single woman in Waikiki.
: “Hell no. We didn’t do jack shit.”
: “Are people gonna blame us for this too?”
: The broken film reel effect where the date rapidly advances is getting slower. At the beginning, it was skipping several months at a time.
: I don’t remember if they made it so that when you get past Okumura’s palace the date stops at the day the entire Sae/Joker conversation takes place or not.
: “No matter how I think about it, that would’ve been impossible unless Makoto was helping you… but.. she would never do anything so foolish…”
: “And is it true that you were completely uninvolved with the Kobayakawa case?”
: “What does this mean…? But I suppose targeting someone at Shujin again and actually taking their life would be nonsensical.”
: Come to think of it, wouldn’t this entire plan have been broken if the principal had just wrote something down? The first thing the police would do is search his office. How would they know he wouldn’t do it?
: “I have no reason to believe everything you’ve said. …However, it seems you aren’t the type of person who would lie just to protect themselves.”
: “I will acknowledge what I must. It’s more efficient that way.”
: “…In any case, let’s move on to the topic at hand. If you saw my investigation data, you would’ve had the same suspicions I did about Okumura.”
: “And if you looked into his Palace, you should’ve seen the answer to those suspicions. Tell me. What did the Phantom Thieve do to Okumura? What did you learn from him?”
: “Why did it turn out as it did? I need you to tell me everything.”
: You can probably guess what’s going to happen, but oh boy you haven’t seen how bad Okumura’s palace is. It’s supposedly godawful even after the overhaul it got in Royal.
: “People are already talking about it online.”
: “Nobody’s saying it’s 'cause of the Phantom Thieves… so far.”
: “People think he did it because that tabloid exposed how he was covering up Kamoshida’s abuses.”
: “Could it be that.. we’re responsible for Principal Kobayakawa’s suicide?”
: “Whaddya mean?”
: “If we hadn’t changed Kamoshida’s heart, maybe this never would’ve happened…”
: “But then Kamoshida woulda kept doing what he did if we didn’t go and take him down.”
: "The comments I’ve seen are similar as well. ‘Only the Phantom Thieves are on our side!’ ‘I wish the Phantom Thieve would take down the police and the politicians of this country!’ "
: “It’s not just the news. There’s even Phantom Thieves merchandise now… I never expected we’d end up as such a big deal…”
: I mean, you were only in a highly anticipated sequel to one of the best JRPGs of all time that was completely botched because of Hashino.
: “It seems like the public would rather believe in us than in the adults. People are trying to get the Phantom Thieves to solve societal problems, not just personal ones.”
: “I mean, the principal was coverin’ up stuff, right? I guess.. he got what was comin’ to him.”
: “That’s…”
: Makoto’s been surprisingly quiet this cutscene, and I think it’s because she just used all her SP (Smart Points) on that last cutscene with Sae.
: “Whoa, guys, let’s get back on topic. Weren’t we going to discuss the data we obtained from Niijima?”
: “You tell them, Inari..”
: “Why me? First, Prosecutor Niijima has been looking into the continued cases of people suddenly collapsing. It seems she is searching for a common thread to tie them all together.”
: “Some parts seem to be speculation, but she has cited a beneficiary of the majority of these incidents.”
: “Okumura? I feel like I’ve heard that name somewhere…”
: “From Big Bang Burger.”
: “Big Bang Burger!? For real!?”
: “You know, they only got famous sometime in the past few years. They even had a branch in Hawaii.”
: You.. do realize that you’re saying this to a room full of people who were there - except Futaba, but she had the magic phone hack.
: “It says here they benefited both from scandals and the resignations of their competitors’ executives.”
: “That would seem to be the case.”
: “This is too suspicious though. Only one CEO is profiting from these seemingly accidental incidents. I think it’s natural to suspect he’s intentionally causing them.”
: “I get that, but still…”
: “That settles it then! He’s totally our next target!”
: “That’s right. Okumura is at the top of the rankings, after all.”
: “Hold on. That doesn’t necessarily mean he’s evil. If we jump into this too carelessly… beyond that, this Phantom Thieves fad is… unsettling.”
: “Yeah.. the excitement levels don’t feel normal. We might want to let things calm down a bit first…”
: “You too, Ann!? You’re just gonna go against what people want!?”
: “Huh? No, but…”
: “For real…?”
: “Even you, Ryuji! You just back down the second someone disagrees with you!”
: “What?”
: Wait, what? He was all for it until he realized Ann and Yusuke wanted more time due to whole dumbass Chronicle thing they have going on.
: “I guess all you’ve been talking about is using the Phantom Thieves name to pick up girls anyway. Being hyped up because of the popularity is fine, but getting conceited over it is unacceptable.”
: “Hey, aren’t you actin’ for your own benefit here too?”
: “My appearance might have changed, but I’m still an admirable human! At the very least, I’m more admirable than some carnal blond monkey!”
: “You little…!”
: “Fine. I can take on some small-time target like Okumura on my own. Sorry, but it looks like I’ll be getting the credit for solving the mental shutdown mystery.”
: Is it both of you? Because I think it is.
: “All right then! Bring it on!”
: “Ryuji, stop!”
: “Morgana, wait!”
: “…See you.”
: “I bet he’s back in no time… dammit!”
: “All right. I’ve managed by myself before, and I can do it again now. I just need to take down Okumura before those guys do!”
: I mean, if by "managed by yourself’ you mean you got thrown in a cell in Kamoshida’s palace, then..
: “The public believes in the justice of the Phantom Thieves. They have no interest in that principal.”
: I don’t know if that was meant to be a pun or not.
: “I’m experiencing equal levels of frustration. My comments on TV turned everyone against me. Then again, I won’t allow mere criticism to break my spirit so easily.”
: “My suspicion after the hacker’s case last month is now conviction, thanks to the principal’s death. The mental shutdown cases and the psychotic breakdowns are surely the Phantom Thieves’ doing.”
: “I remember the data you showed me about Okumura Foods. Is that the basis for these beliefs?”
: “There have been frequent occurrences of mental shutdowns surrounding Okumura recently. If only there was a clear connection between him and the Phantom Thieves…”
: “Well, it would be problematic if there wasn’t one.”
: “So you’re jumping the gun here. You really told a man you would terminate his parental authority based purely on your speculation?”
: “I’m surprised you would say such a thing to the owner of a cafe you frequent…”
: “It’s all for the sake of the case.”
: “You may have the backing of the SIU’s director.. but you’ve been far too aggressive, Sae-san. You’re trespassing into police territory. Don’t say nobody warned you if it becomes an issue later.”
: “We first need to know what methods the Phantom Thieves are using. The police can’t make a move unless that becomes apparent, after all.”
: “The opponent can’t be caught by following the rules. What need is there to stick to formalities?”
: It really did not take him long to get fucking owned, did it?
: It’s almost like this game’s trying to have a message but forgets the whole “Bonds between people are the real power” thing from Persona 4.
: Well, now we know that Haru has access to the Metaverse. Next time, we’ll see visit Okumura’s Palace, see Haru’s Phantom Thief form, and fail to simply shoot Morgana. We’re still on cutscenes until 09/18.
: Please also go vote in the poll, because I’m cutting it off three updates from now, on the update that contains the Mementos visit on 09/19. As it stands, the game will be migrated to the PS5 for the final few dungeons and I will be making my gamebreaker.
: You know though, I wonder where the principal got isekai’d to.
: “Oh, absolutely. Of course, you don’t want to just run in and stab him - that’s not going to work. Do you have a sniper rifle?”
: “Okay, the sniper rifle’s a no-go. What about.. poison? You’ve got that, right? Just dump some in his food and be as far away as possible when he eats it.”
: “To kill the king.”