Click Here for Update 52
: “She asked me to show her your picture though… apparently, um… she thinks you look a little lame… she told me that my boyfriend isn’t in the same league as her Tsukasa.”
: “But I think she’ll change her mind once she sees you in person. Don’t worry, I’ll back you up.”
: Makoto’s Rank 6 requires that we have a maxed Charm stat. Thankfully, we’re way ahead of schedule on that.
: I looked it up out of curiosity, and gay host clubs are apparently very much a thing in Japan.
: What I’m saying is that they should’ve put in a showtime attack with Joker and Yusuke where Yusuke goes to Joker’s host club and requests him and then they get into a shootout and throw a molotov in a champagne bottle at the enemy.
: “Y-Yes, I am.. totally…”
: “Y-Yeah…”
: Tsukasa’s like “Why is he gritting his teeth and muttering ‘Yusuke’ over and over?”
: “…”
: “Um, there’s something I’d like to ask you… are you serious about pursuing a relationship with Eiko?”
: “…I just wanted to make sure you’re good for her.”
: I hate that the game has to bash you over the fucking head with the fact that Tsukasa’s an asshole. This confidant almost could’ve been interesting if they hadn’t gone the predictable route.
: “Huh?”
: “I-I, um…”
: “I do have one more question to ask… you’re not going to bring Eiko to your club, are you?”
: “I hope he’s not tricking her.. but no matter what I might think, I still don’t have any proof… and above all, Eiko seems to be happy. Am I just.. getting in the way of their happiness?”
: I don’t care that we can all see the “plot twist” coming a mile away, I will take any opportunity I can to dunk on Makoto. Seriously though, she has no personality.
: “You may be right.. in the end, I know this is just a hunch.. but my father always stressed how important it is to trust hunches.”
: “It seems that host has sent me something already. …What is this supposed to be saying? It’s full of emojis.”
: I am going to actually transcribe this with the emojis in question, because otherwise it’d look weird due to the site not being able to handle the * action here * thing properly.
: “It’s meee, Tsukasa. 
I no we just met but I cudn’t wait 2 
u. Im so haP to B friends with U, Mako-chan 
”
: “That was barely a coherent sentence, but I’ll need to get used to that if I’m going to help Eiko… by the way, I’m glad you were here with me. I would have really panicked had I been alone.”
: “But I’m working through that with your help, so… thank you.”
: We now have Harisen Recovery on everyone but Morgana.
: “We should get going too. I’ll let you know if anything else comes up. Goodbye.”
: “I feel strangely exhausted. It reminds me of when we went to the red-light district… even after we split ways, that host kept sending me messages.”
: “He uses these weird symbols - I have no idea what he’s saying. I want to ignore him, but I shouldn’t for Eiko’s sake..”
: Makoto complaining about other people talking too much but saying very little is like the Allansons complaining about bad writing and spaghetti code.
: “Oh, yeah. That’d be a good excuse to ignore him. You have some great ideas. Thanks, I’ll try responding with that.”
: Ten minutes later, Makoto IMs Joker. “Wait.. so all those times I tried to call you and you said you were on a date…”
: “…I just can’t shake these doubts about Eiko’s boyfriend. I can’t tell if he’s a bad guy, but he doesn’t seem on the level either… I’ll need a little more information. Thanks for all your advice. I’ll talk to you later.”
: Joker’s village has been burned to the ground by the villain, because he’s an RPG protagonist?
: “I suppose all you really need to change fate is a strong will, like what you have. I wish I could do more though…”
: “By the way, Kurusu-san.. this man here is Fukurai-san. He’s um.. the chairman of the ADP. Oh right, you don’t know about the ADP yet! It stands for..”
: Adaptability? Yeah, that stat was one of the reasons Dark Souls 2 sucked. That and Soul Memory. Fuck anything that inhibits my ability to invade.
: This is why I don’t like Chihaya’s confidant much. Sure, the abilities you get from it rule - but she comes across as kind of a total dumbass.
: The other problem is that this entire plotline is something that’s been done before. I don’t get how Persona as a franchise goes from Persona 1 (which was pretty unique at the time) to this.
: “Fukurai-san, um…”
: “Y-Yes. I’ll cover the decrease in revenue with my fortune-telling fees. Um, Fukurai-san… I, um… I’m not sure how effective these Holy Stones really are..”
: “W-Well…”
: “Th-That’s not it…”
: “I…”
: “Kurusu-san…”
: “…Hahaha. I-I’ve never actually worked at a night club! I did get tricked into walking into one though… anyway, the chairman is known for exaggerating details.”
: “You must think I’m weird, huh? All this talk about me being a maiden or a monster…”
: “Huh…? Nobody’s ever treated me so nicely before… by the way, it was pretty amazing how we stood up to the chairman back there. I would never have been able to talk to him about the Holy Stones had I been alone…”
: “But your strength helped me speak up. I need to be strong like you more often…”
: “Even so, the chairman seems serious about the whole Holy Stone issue. He’ll make me pay a fine if I don’t meet my quotas… and there’s a huge penalty for resigning from my post…”
: “I suppose my fate is impossible to change after all… anyway, I should close up for today! Good night!”
: You might ask why the game doesn’t immediately give us Chihaya’s Mementos request when it’s obvious what it’s going to be. For some reason, we don’t get the request until Rank 7 - and just like with Kawakami, we need to waste a night to pick it up.
: “I already know what I must do in order to change my fate.. but whenever I face the Chairman, I can’t find the courage to say what I need to…”
: “Oh…! You’re absolutely right. Nothing will come of making excuses. I’m the only one who can change my weakness.. you’re so strong, Kurusu.”
: I wish you could change your weaknesses in this game, because that would’ve made evolving the party member Personas worth it.
: “…I’m going to think about all this a little more. Thank you once again for today. I’ll see you next time.”
: We get another one of those cutscenes where Joker is on his phone, but it’s a duplicate. Instead, let’s go right to Chihaya, because we need a luck reading for Kindness.
: We also need to bribe Chihaya for confidant points.. with Chihaya. I’m really surprised there’s no unique dialog for this.
: Speaking of which, I mentioned last update that I wasn’t sure how many affinity readings we actually needed with Ann. The answer is we did need one - but only one.
: We’re working at the florist’s today for two reasons. The first is that we need it for a Mementos request (and thus for Mishima’s confidant) but also because it’s custom bouquet day and we get seven points to Kindness out of this.
: And.. oh fuck, it’s custom bouquet day.
: “This guy has ‘I forgot my anniversary until the last minute’ written all over his face.”
: “Let’s start with a blue jasmine. They symbolize honesty and trust. I had a few in the corsages Tatsuya and I wore at our wedding - they’re great for arranging.”
: “Next up.. white orchids. They symbolize elegance and beauty. If you cut them just right, you can take them right out of the bouquet and grow them as cuttings.”
: “And to top it off, let’s add some yellow freesia. They represent joy, renewal, and friendship. I used to wrap them into the ribbons I’d put on the gifts I’d give Tatsuya every year for our anniversary.”
: “Then one day, I stopped by his garage to drop his lunch off.. and right above his workbench is a frame with a beautiful arrangement of pressed freesia in it. He’d saved every single one I’d given him.”
: It’s amazing how everyone has the full names and descriptions of all these people but never report it to anyone.
: “It sounds like everyone’s starting to get anxious… but considering how fast the days are closing in, the best thing we can do is stay calm.”
: This is the last crossword we need to do. I’ll still probably do them anyway.
: Tonight, for the first time in months, we meet up with Mishima again. I can tell you exactly why this is: it’s because there’s no one else available tonight.
: “This book here is all about the latest security techniques, and this is, um.. a model gun. It cost me a lot of money…”
: Of course Mishima would buy a Glock. You can buy any model gun you want.. and you buy a Glock.
: “Well, yeah! That just goes to show how special it is! I heard they had to completely halt production because people kept mistaking it for a real gun.”
: Joker: “Mishima, that’s a Glock 17. It’s one of the most common handguns in the world. There is nothing special about it.”
: “It was suggested to me by this military buff from the Phandom. I figured I could use a bit of security, since I’m the sole admin of the whole Phan-Site.”
: “I mean, you guys are getting really popular. There’s been a lot more info on the forum lately too.. some of the stuff up there is pretty scary, so it seemed like I might need a little protection.”
: So you’re going to do.. what exactly, draw your fake Glock.. and then what?
: “I mean, people might come after me if they found out I was working with the Phantom Thieves, right? It’s important I have a way to defend myself in those situations.”
: “But as I was saying, we’ve had a pretty massive influx of new posts on the forum lately. One of them seems particularly worthwhile. It’s bigger than anything we’ve done so far…”
: “But if we want to really make the Phantom Thieves famous, we’ll need to go after some flashier targets. Leave this to me though. I’ll get all the info we need, even if I have to put myself in danger to do it!”
: “By the way, um.. do I look any different to you? People keep telling me it seems like I’ve changed recently. I guess I can’t hide my newfound confidence, huh? My true worth will finally-”
: “Y-Yeah, haha…”
: “Huh? N-No, I haven’t…”
: I mean, why change your number? I spent the better part of two years scrubbing mine after I got it, no thanks to the previous owner who had cleaned out one of those TV rental places and fled the state.
: I remember getting dozens of phone calls a day about credit cards and rentals and missed child support payments and having to convince idiots that it wasn’t the same person.
: “R-Right… ahaha…”
: I’d say this is almost a Chad/Virgin meme given that Akiyama is blonde-ish, but that didn’t really take off until 2017.
: “It’s not what it looks like.. okay? You know that one guy in every class who ends up being the butt of all the jokes? That guy was me.”
: “I’m not going to be that boring guy anymore…! …Sorry about that. Anyway, it’s getting late. We should probably head home. See you later.”
: “Just so you know, I’m going to work even harder. Not just in managing the Phan-Site, but also help make the Phantom Thieves household names!”
: “I’m gonna do everything in my power, so you can just kick back and relax!”
: “What…? N-No, not really… you just go ahead and focus on changing those bad guys’ hearts! Okay, I better go. But we’ll talk again soon, okay?”
: Regrettably, it’s Makoto Day again.
: “His days and nights at work are reversed due to his work, so he often sends me a ‘good morning’ late at night…”
: "I’m not sure. I’d definitely tell Eiko if he asked me on a date… but for now things are generally pretty normal. Mostly messages like ‘how’s ur bf’ and ‘hope u had a gr8 day 2day.’ "
: “…Do you think their relationship could actually be serious? Was I just biased to think that all he wants from Eiko is her money?”
: “I mean, it does sound like a TV show. A lying host that tricks women into debt, then forces them to sell their bodies… but.. those kind of things exist in reality as well. Immoral hosts, human trafficking rings..”
: “My father even mentioned to me about gangs of men that look specifically for depressed women in Shinjuku.. they take advantage of the loneliness those girls feel to force them into horribly abusive situations..”
: “Then after ensuring the girls are buried in crippling debt, they make them sell their bodies to pay it off. There are other ways they force girls into it as well. Blackmail, illegal immigration..”
: “There are countless victims of schemes like that… countless gangs as well. My father was going after a particularly notorious one when…”
: “…The impact killed him instantly.”
: He got isekai’d? I wonder if her dad had any kind of ambition to be the President of the United States, because that’d explain a lot.
: “At first it was thought to be an accident.. but at the funeral, I overheard my father’s supervisor speaking with my sister. He was saying my father had likely been assassinated.”
: “They suspected that the gang he was investigating hired the driver..”
: Joker’s like “Was it the Taiwanese Mafia, because I mean, at this point you’re so much of a Persona 2 ripoff that I wouldn’t be surprised if they just kinda tossed Baofu’s storyline in there.”
: “I don’t know. The driver died on impact as well… but apparently, they found drugs in his bloodstream.”
: “Either way, that gang has been pushed back into the shadows thanks to the Shinjuku clean-up operation… I’m not sure any of it would have happened if not for the incident with my father..”
: “He truly was, wasn’t he? I wish I could be a little more like him myself… instead, I’ve just been hesitant. That’s actually why my sister became a prosecutor to begin with.”
: “She couldn’t stand by and watch as evil prevailed over justice.. that passion undoubtedly came from our father.”
: Joker: “Did she want to become a pastry chef before she became a cop, or does her story at least have an ounce of originality injected into it?”
: “Our mother passed away many years ago, so when our father was killed, we had to survive on our own. The responsibility.. the pressure of that all fell on my sister.”
: In the base game, this scene wasn’t that bad - but remember, we already know most of this from the scene Makoto had with Maruki that was added for Royal.
: Sure, Royal’s writers could’ve re-written this event to be less repetitive, but instead they’re giving us the usual “Can’t be helped!”
: “Because of that, she can’t help but talk down on our father at times… she says death is no different than surrender. But… I still look up to him.”
: Now this line, this one’s just inexcusable because the scene with Makoto and Sae during the Kaneshiro arc (remember, the one where Sae outright said that?) was in the base game.
: “I was often lonely because of how much time he spent at work… but seeing him tirelessly pursue one case after the next was nothing short of incredible.”
: “That was how my father chose to live his life… trying to bring justice and order to the world around him.”
: "Yeah… come to think of it, there was something he used to say to me all the time.. ‘the most important part of your life is how you choose to live it.’ "
: “Hm… how have I chosen to live? And more importantly, how do I want to live…?”
: “Now…? You’re right. I can still change my path going forward… to be honest, I’ve been determined to follow the path my sister laid for me.. after my father’s death, I wanted to lighten the burden as much as I possibly could…”
: “O-oh, we were supposed to be talking about Eiko here. Sorry for going so off-topic… you know, I’ve never actually talked to anyone about my father.. it’s such a painful memory to look back on…”
: “But I feel comfortable discussing it with you. And beyond that, I think I understand my life a bit better now.. so.. thank you.”
: Just like the earlier ability by the same name, this ability doesn’t reveal repel/null/drain but shows it in the targeting menu if you already know what they are for whatever you’re targeting.
: “Mayb I’ll like, skip college n just get married 2 Tsukasa insted… I guess she’s choosing how she wants to live too. As long as she’s sure she’ll be happy…”
: “U serious abt Kurusu-kun? Wanna hav a double wedding?”
: Unfortunately, we’re forced to pick this top option for points. We all know Makoto is going to end up marrying a man-sized baked potato with no sour cream or cheese.
: Speaking of marriage, I got a third artist by the name of Yoko (or Yokobox) to do the fourth part of More Like Yusu-Gay, which we’ll see in October.
: giggle “Don’t be ridiculous. I couldn’t even begin to think about marriage at this point in my life. By the way, can you keep pretending to be my boyfriend for a bit longer?”
: “That’s the best method I have of keeping tabs on Eiko and Tsukasa. At any rate, thanks for listening to me today. I’ll let you know if anything urgent comes up. See you later.”
: “I just wanted to talk about Eiko, but I got a little off-topic.. thanks for still pretending to be my boyfriend, too. I don’t trust Eiko’s boyfriend yet, so… can we keep this up until I can make a call one way or the other?”
: “Thanks, I’m counting on you. Let’s see how convincing a boyfriend you can be. I’ll talk to you later. Bye.”
: And now it’s time for another Caroline and Justine outing. This day is probably the longest one we have in this update, because we already did Ann’s Rank 10 last update.
: “Listen closely: the place we wish to evaluate for your rehabilitation is.. a present-day Tower of Babel.”
: “It looms high in the heavens - so high that the humans below on earth are no longer even visible to the naked eye.”
: “Such a grand structure would be far too dangerous for humans.. we find that we have a duty to investigate. Does this location sound at all familiar to you?”
: “Well? If you know where it is, then escort us there immediately!”
: “So it’s named the Skytree, huh? That’s pretty impressive-sounding! It’s no Tower of Babel, but still, quite fine!”
: “Yes, the boldness of the moniker is quite promising. Take us there at once.”
: “And the metal box that took us here.. my ears were so tortured by its sounds, I thought I would faint.. but as a trial for reaching this place, it was mere child’s play.”
: METAL BOXESSSS? Warhammer was a mistake on multiple (simultaneous) levels.
: “Oh my, what could that tiny thing in the sky be? …An airplane? They truly do appear to be quite cramped inside!”
: If Joker ever introduced the twins to 40k, Caroline would absolutely play Chaos. Justine would probably pick Dark Eldar or the Tau.
: “This is quite the view… it almost appears as if we could crush the people below like insects.”
: “Oh! Justine! Look at that!”
: “Loud as ever.. what is it?”
: I’m not sure what exactly they’re talking about. It’s probably because I’ve never been in one of those towers.
: “Are you insane!?”
: “It is most assuredly a trap, Caroline. Any passerby that comes too close to it is clearly doomed. By the way, Inmate…”
: “I’ve heard this Tower of Babel has a path that leads even higher than where we are now, all the way to the heavens…”
: “WHAT!? Is that true!? Take us there immediately!”
: “Yes, we can see well past the city from here, almost to the ends of the earth. However… Caroline, are you attempting to back out of this?”
: “Wh-what do you mean by that!? Why would I suddenly get scared after already coming so close!?”
: “Ah, I see… then why not go even closer and enjoy the view?”
: “Wha-!? Cut it out! If you wanna look so badly, then go DO IT!”
: I like that they ask this and not “Why are they in police cosplay?” or “Why is that one carrying a collapsible baton?”
: Joker’s like “Wait, you mean you two aren’t invisible to everyone else? But wait.. no one in the party can see you.. how the hell does this even work?”
: “What a burden… you are the one who should feel humiliated.”
: “What a great view, though. I see how looking down from here could make a person feel like a god. Hmph. Human desire really knows no bounds, does it?”
: “Yes. It’s no wonder their hearts grow twisted when they’re living in a city frothing with so much desire.”
: “Well, we’ve learned the secret of the Tower of Babel, so we’ll consider this assignment complete.”
: “You’d better keep up this progress, Inmate!”
: “Now you will accompany us for our return.”
: The 19th is when we were scheduled to do Ann’s Rank 10 event, so I did that off-camera. Instead, it’s burger time.
: Correction: It’s burger time after we back out of this dialog and get a luck reading for Guts.
: The final burger requires rank four in every social stat except Kindness.
: If this was a point and click adventure game, there would be a puzzle where you have to steal the Twins’ selective invisibility to make Ryuji and Yusuke invisible so you can cheat.
: We then get seven points to Guts and five to all other social stats that aren’t Kindness. What I wasn’t expecting..
: Was that this would rank up our Knowledge to 5. For the record, we were not supposed to get this until the 25th. I have no idea how we went from being behind on Knowledge to being nearly a week ahead. I know those extra luck readings helped, but not by that much.
: Of course, social stats aren’t the only thing we’re going to be finishing this update.
: “By the way, the track team’s up and runnin’ again. Yamauchi got taken down pretty quick. You know Takeishi’s mom is the PTA prez, right? He told her everything.”
: “Wish I coulda seen the look on Yamauchi’s face. I mean, the school can’t ignore the PTA. And as a result, the track team’s back. Our old coach’s fillin’ in for now.”
: Wait, what? You said in your Rank 9 that you weren’t going to join the track team again! Which is it!?
: “Man, it serves that dick right! What a great feelin’! I think they might even go far in the meet.”
: “Hell yeah! Aw crap, the ramen’s gonna get soggy. Let’s eat!”
: “To tell the truth, I was scared of facin’ those guys straight up. I couldn’t stand how much they hated me. It only just made me think of how stupid I was…”
: “Most of all, it made me remember how I lost my place with them. Hey, this ain’t like me, but… I managed to change ‘cause you were here helpin’ me.”
: “I got you all wrapped up in this shit, but you stayed with me 'til the bitter end. …You didn’t abandon me. So… thanks, man.”
: “Hahaha… it’s funny, huh? This started out as us trainin’ for the Phantom Thieves. How’d it end up like this? Either way, it’s my turn now. If anything comes up, you tell me. I’ll help you with whatever you need.”
: This is just the “If you come here, you’ll find me” scene from FF8. And.. cue music… even though Ryuji’s confidant was so meh it really doesn’t deserve it.
RETURNING PERSONA: Seiten Taisei
Origin: China
First Appearance: Shin Megami Tensei I
Also known as Sun Wukong and Son Goku. Monkey born from a rock who mastered Buddhist magic and ran amok over the heavens until being imprisoned beneath a mountain for five hundred years. Served under the priest Xuanzang on his journey to India. Main character of Journey to the West.
: Seiten Taisei upgrades Ryuji’s electric resist to a null and adds resistance to fire. We’re still never going to use him.
: “First up: the Phantom Thieves! I’ll be countin’ on you, Leader. And you can count on me too! Hey, now that we’re all fueled up, wanna race to the station?”
: “I have to agree with Makoto. Who knows how this might turn out…”
: After another trip to Chihaya (this time for a luck reading in Proficiency that we probably didn’t need) we’re off to see Iwai. Now, what if I told you that we’re going to max out a second social stat this update?
: “I’m s’posd to be runnin’ an honorable business here, y’know. …Though honestly, the customers’ve been runnin’ a little thin lately.”
: “Some guy on the internet’s been claimin’ all my goods’re knock-offs. And once you got a bad rap like that, it’s real tough to shake it.”
: “…You goin’ through somethin’ similar? I guess you wouldn’t be doin’ any of this if you weren’t, huh… don’t gimme any details though. I don’t wanna know.”
: “Anyways, I should prolly fill you in on what’s goin’ on here since you’ll be helpin’ me out. I’d bet anythin’ the guy behind that rumor is Tsuda. You remember his name from the diner, yeah?”
: “Truth is, he’s the second in command of the Hashiba clan. The same clan I was in… back when I was part of the yakuza.”
: Joker’s like “Okay, I need to know who your tattoo guy is. I want a dragon on my back and my boyfriend needs a matching one.”
: “Heh, you got some nerve. Anyways, Tsuda was my sworn brother back in the clan. I got some.. unsavory business goin’ down with him now though.”
: “Problem is, I’m a known quantity in the underworld. One bad step and I’d have guys crawlin’ all over me. That’s why I’ve got you around.”
: “You look normal, sure… but you got balls, kid. Makes you perfect for snoopin’ on Tsuda. …Hope I ain’t scarin’ you off with all this talk.”
: “Heh, idiot. But y’know, I’ve got a bit of a soft spot for idiots like you. Anyways, you get the gist of what’s goin’ on now, yeah? You’ll be workin’ with that in mind.”
: “I expect a lot from you, kid. …Oh, and I’ll add to that special menu, to thank you for getttin’ that info for me the other day.”
: I’m not sure what status effects this lets you access, but I’ll be putting these on once we get new guns before the next dungeon. We all know how devastating status bullets were in Persona 1.
: “…Just go home n’ study, Kaoru. You’ve got entrance exams comin’ up, remember?”
: “That’s Kaoru.. my son. He’s always askin’ me if he can help out here, always worryin’ about what I’m gettin’ up to. sigh But I prolly shouldn’t be tellin’ a kid like you about this…”
: Joker: “Look, as long as it gets me the anime gun, I’ll stay quiet.”
: “Well, you can head home for today. Nice work, kid. See ya next time.”
: When I did the recording for this, I was audibly dumbfounded as to how we got Proficiency maxed so early. We’re nearly a month ahead of schedule on that.. and then I realized it’s because chalk dodges are worth three points each and we got several of those, along with the bonus for crafting.
: Next time, we’ll have two solid days of cutscene as Futaba’s arc comes to a close. We’ll also win the lottery and trade for what I can only assume are severed human limbs.